In multicultural societies, the pressure to buy stuff never lets up throughout the year

Every Christmas I get into a panic trying to find the perfect presents to stuff into stockings because people are usually never happy with my gifts.

I trawl the malls looking at wonderful things like bath bomb soaps, wooden, hand-crafted knee massager from Kerala and essential oils that help make your home smell like it was strewn with lemons cut in half.

I pay attention to the gifts I buy in this season of giving, as most of the presents I receive have to be re-gifted and then some poor soul is then left wondering as to what he or she should do with the coffee mug with a picture of a fat, overweight, obese Santa, smiling benevolently.

Greta Thunberg, Swedish environmental activist, would be proud of us, as my wife and I become a one-family recycling unit after each festival. Do you think they will know this gift we are giving is a re-gift? I ask my wife guiltily. Just throw away the box, and wrap the gift in that fancy tissue wrapping paper, says my wife.

(Amazon, Flipkart and Ali Baba, should start a new department called One mans (womans or any other gender) trash is another persons treasure and sell the returned stuff at a huge discount).

By the way, in this age of self-awareness isnt it time that Santa should be depicted as a hot, slim, vegetarian health freak with neon green trainers who goes jogging with his elves?

The pressure to make you buy gifts for the people you care, starts way, way ahead of Christmas, sometime in the beginning of October. The emails start pouring in your inbox and then you think; Should I get the spouse the latest waterproof Kindle, even though you know she does not read books, so you could quietly take it back from her later?

The online retailers know how to cajole you and make you type in the CVS number that is on the back of the credit card. We like your face, take 75 per cent off on any item only for this week and you fall for it.

Living in multicultural societies such as India, or Canada, the pressure to buy stuff never lets up throughout the year.

In India, every Diwali, the festival of lights, the whole family goes to a jewellery shop and buys tons of gold jewellery as if they were savvy investors who knew that the time has come to invest in this metal. (Luckily, you do not have buy gold for your friends and relatives, you buy it for yourself).

In Dubai, another multicultural society, the biggest stress is wondering to which Eid tent you should take your friends to as hotels vie with each other to attract customers with scrumptious buffets and the eating goes on well into the early hours of the morning.

Meanwhile, in India, the Eid parties are extravagant after the monthlong fast and spas and saloons do roaring business and the textile shops are packed and tailors become the heroes of the hour. Newspaper adverts entice people to buy everything from a new scooter to clunky furniture.

Meanwhile, back to gift-giving in Christmas and the courier service, UPS, has dubbed January 3 as National Returns Day as tons of packages are sent back to retailers.

But there are some people who love shopping so much, such as my wife, that returning the gifts becomes shopping too and the fun begins all over again.

I will be keenly following the jolly old gentleman on NORAD Tracks Santa while he delivers gifts to people across the world, but I doubt if he will make another trip to take back returns.

Mahmood Saberi is a storyteller and blogger based in Bengaluru, India. Twitter: @mahmood_saberi

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It's the thought that counts in Christmas | Opinion - Gulf News

Sherronda J. Brown x Dec 16, 2019

This essay contains spoilers for Knives Out and mentions suicide.

The Thrombey family is mourning the loss of its patriarch, Harlan Thrombey (Christopher Plummer), a wildly successful mystery crime writer who was found dead the morning after his 85th birthday party. The question is whether this was a murder or death by suicide, and everyone is a suspect. Lieutenant Elliott (Lakeith Stanfeld) and Trooper Wagner (Noah Segan) arrive to investigate, accompanied by the famous and eccentric Private Detective, Benoit Blanc (Daniel Craig, doing a Southern American accent thats so bad its good). From this scenario unfolds a delightfully smart and funny Whodunnit adventure that is well worth the ride and culminates in one of the most satisfying endings I could ever hope for with a film like this. All in all, Knives Out is a genuinely fun and entertaining watching experience. Its also an unexpected, but very welcomed, commentary on white American nationalism, racism, xenophobia, white liberalism, and the false narrative of self-made independent wealth.

Seems like all his kids are self-made overachievers, Lieutenant Elliott comments while questioning the Thrombey family members. But there is a noticeable trace of sharpness and cynicism in his voice. Its true that several of the Thrombeys think of themselves as self-made and independently wealthy. I built my business from the ground up, says Linda (Jamie Lee Curtis), without a hint of irony or self-awareness, but neither she nor the others would have their financial or social capital without the wealth shared with them by Harlan.

Joni (Toni Collette) runs a skincare company, but she wouldnt be able to do so without the yearly allowance from Harlan. Her daughter, Meg (Katherine Langford), is able to attend a good college without worrying about tuition payments because Harlan finances it. Walt (Michael Shannon) runs the publishing company that Harlan created and funds. When Walt keeps referring to the books as our books at his birthday party, Harlan interjects to remind him, Theyre not our books. Theyre my books. Its very apparent to everyone around themespecially the audiencethat none of them are anywhere close to being self-made. Regardless, the Thrombeys hold tight to their delusions, existing as representations of many white American wealth-hoarders who do mental gymnastics to avoid admitting to how white supremacy, colonialism, and chattel slavery have created a racial wealth gap and how there are systems in place to prevent the socioeconomic mobility of BIPOC.

The film builds with more and more obvious examples of white entitlement, racism, and nationalism throughout. Lindas husband, Richard (Don Johnson), quotes the Immigrants, we get the job done lyric from Lin-Manuel Mirandas Broadway sensation, Hamilton, in a cringe-worthy moment of performative white allyship. But soon after, we see him railing against immigrants and defending Donald Trump. I dont like him, hes an asshole, he insists before repeating the same arguments weve heard from many Trump supporters time and again. But maybe an asshole is what we needed America is for Americans.

Walts wife, Donna (Riki Lindhome), chimes in to say, We are losing our way of our life and our culture. Her hand shakes in a panic as she rants about how Mexicans are coming into the country, taking over, and wanting to have everything their way. Richard agrees, more or less, demanding that they should all have to earn their share, Build something from the ground up just like dad and all the rest of us. To drive his point home, he invites Marta (Ana de Armas) to join in the conversation because he naively believes she will agree with him, noting that she and her family came into the country the right way.

Marta was Harlans humble and compassionate nurse, close friend, and confidant. Richard and the rest of the Thrombeys see her as a good kid and, essentially, a model minority. They have no idea that her mother is undocumented. They also have no idea which country she and her family immigrated from. Different people throw out different guessesUruguay, Ecuador, Braziland each of them speak with undue confidence in their knowledge about her, her family, and her experiences. Both Linda and Walt express their regret for Marta not being allowed to attend Harlans funeral for some unnamed reason. Independently, they say that they thought she should have been there, but they were out voted. Marta is like family to them, they say. That is, until she becomes a barrier to them receiving the totality of Harlans inheritancea fortune they think they deserve.

Their hypocrisy reveals itself in more ways than this, especially in their mutual disgust for and disapproval of Ransom (Chris Evans) and Jacob (Jaeden Martell). They regard Ransom as the black sheep of the family because he has never had a real job and has always been provided for by his grandfather. While hurling insults like trustfund jerk and entitled prick at him, they refuse to acknowledge that they are all equally spoiled and doted upon by Harlan. But Ransom is seemingly aware of the reality of the situation and the privilege he holds in a way that the others are not. My mother built her business from the ground up with a million-dollar loan from my grandfather, he sneers, the only one who tells the truth about the fact that Harlan is the only reason why the rest of the Thrombeys are so successful and why them insisting they are self-made is complete bullshit.

However, even Ransom carries his own delusions about what his family is supposedly entitled to. He tells Marta, We allowed you into our home and now you think you can steal it from us our birthright our ancestral family home? Benoit Blanc laughs heartily at this, amused by the audacity, responding with the fact that Harlan bought this place in the 80s from a Pakistani real estate agent But Ransom yells at him to Shut up! before he can even finish the sentence, because he doesnt want to hear or acknowledge the truth. It would go against the narrative hes created to make himself into a victim and lay claim to something that he never had a right to.He knows that he isnt self-made but he still thinks he has every right to hoard the wealth that he has been given.

The familys displeasure with Jacob, however, is due to his extreme political leanings as a teenage neo-Nazi and Alt-Right troll dipshit. Its true that he is genuinely unpleasant and overtly racist, even openly calling Marta a dirty anchor baby at one point, but the rest of the Thrombeys are also racists. They think themselves better and more highly evolved, but they are all equally terrible, intolerant, entitled, and selfish people too engrossed in their whiteness and class privilege to see how insufferable, toxic, and harmful their entire family actually is. And this means that, if Harlan was murdered, any of them could conceivably be guilty of the crime.

White supremacy and racism manifest themselves in numerous different ways, and the Thrombeys embody many of the White Racist Archetypeswith Meg as the white liberal Feminist Studies major of some unspecified sort who chastises a cop for asking Marta if she is the help but turns her back on Marta as soon as doing so benefits her, Ransom as the white ally and black sheep who helps Marta escape the rest of the family at one point but with ulterior motives, and Walt as the white savior who offers Marta support but doesnt want her to have the means to support herself. All of them end up betraying Marta in significant ways and actively trying to harm her.

The Thrombeys all despise and resent each other, eager to pass the buck and the blame to divert attention away from themselves and direct it towards anyone elses behavior in order to keep their own secrets and distract from their misdeeds, whether they are relevant to the mystery of Harlans death or not. What unites the Thrombeysthe only thing that unites themis the same fundamental understanding of their place in the world, what they believe they are entitled to, and who must be shut out in order for them to retain their power. The same thing unites most white Americans who believe only they get to determine what is right and fair when it comes to wealth and access.

Besides being a great crime thriller, Knives Out proves to be more socially and culturally relevant than one would expect from a Whodunnit mystery such as this. Its a near-perfect picture representation of white American solidarity against people of color. It directly challenges the myth of the self-made wealth-hoarder with a cleverness and levity that feels seminal and timely, while holding up a mirror to show us how shared whiteness operates as a uniting factor of white supremacy and nationalism.

Every single dollar matters to usespecially now when media is under constant threat. Your support is essential and your generosity is why Wear Your Voice keeps going! You are a part of the resistance that is neededuplifting Black and brown feminists through your pledges is the direct community support that allows us to make more space for marginalized voices. For as little as $1 every month you can be a part of this journey with us. This platform is our way of making necessary and positive change, and together we can keep growing.

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The "Self-Made" Wealth False Narrative Gets Directly Confronted In 'Knives Out' - Wear Your Voice

As 2020 fast approaches, it will soon be time for the advertising community to pause, reflect and reset for the year ahead. The start of a year, like many beginnings, is when we become more intentional, not only about what we want to achieve, but how we go about it.

Think about how you show up differently for a new beginning at work, when someone new joins your team, or when you start a new business partnership. In those moments our behaviour becomes more deliberate, as we look to make a positive first impression.

By bringing that same intention to everyday interactions, it is possible to bring greater humanity to leadership. Its an opportunity for more psychologically supportive leadership that helps people to better navigate the complexity and uncertainty of working in the industry.

This approach can play an important role in bolstering peoples social and emotional wellbeing and is a way of leading that helps to increase performance.

A leaders behaviour accounts for a variance of up to 70 per cent in employee engagement, according to research. For a leader to successfully embrace more psychologically supportive behaviours he or she needs to start by developing their self-awareness.

This includes building a greater understanding of the impact they have on others and how their belief system influences the work environment they create. Self-awareness helps to balance the task and people requirements that come with being an effective leader.

Create a Sense of Belonging Belonging means an acceptance by others that can help us deal with the stresses of organisational life. Leaders play a vital role in creating a sense of belonging by being more deliberate in how they communicate with their team.

Leaders often focus on belonging when they are concerned a valued member of the team is thinking of leaving. By connecting with each person in their team more systematically leaders can foster a sense of belonging. Formal and informal interactions reinforce for a team member that my manager values the work I do.

Intentional leaders take the time to validate peoples internal experiences, by listening to understand their challenges, to create the basis on which to offer direction and support.

In team discussions, leaders who foster a sense of belonging value differences, and encourage diverse perspectives. These leaders facilitate involvement from everyone in the team and are more conscious to recognise people for their contribution, instead of focusing solely on the quality of their ideas.

Show Respect for Others When it comes to fostering commitment, engagement and the wellbeing of employees, one of the most powerful drivers is when a leader shows respect.

Respect starts with the small habits that a leader develops, such as being on time to meetings, giving people their full attention and treating everyone equally regardless of status or role.

A lack of respect often stems from a leaders lack of self-awareness. More often than not, they dont recognise their impact on others.

When a leader delivers performance feedback in a respectful way, they understand how negative feedback, when given poorly, can trigger a flight or fight response. A lack of respect often stems from a lack of preparation for a feedback conversation.

Respect also demands that a leader believes in the resourcefulness of their teams ability to get the job done. These are leaders who look for ways to give people more autonomy in the time they dedicate, and the order in which they complete tasks to help reduce stress and burnout.

Offer a Deeper Meaning People need a reason to care about achieving organisational goals; especially Millennials who are entering the workforce in higher numbers, and are looking for safety, belonging, and a sense of meaning in their work.

Although extrinsic rewards like incentives play a part, we also need the intrinsic reward that comes with leaders giving people a deeper meaning to achieve goals.

We know from research that when people have a clear sense of purpose, it contributes to increased task persistence and encourages them to learn faster.

When people are learning on the job and working towards meaningful goals, it supports their wellbeing, as they are more likely to feel like they are thriving in their role.

A team purpose doesn't need to be altruistic, instead it should be credible and relevant, so each person understands how they are making a difference.

Leaders who seek to provide deeper meaning make the team purpose a part of daily interactions, with regular updates on each persons contribution to achieving the shared goals. When the feedback is fair and consistent with other team members, it positively influences peoples wellbeing and performance.

Socially and emotionally supportive leadership is not about taking a soft approach. It is leadership that recognises what it is to be human in dealing with the industrys unprecedented challenges. To be successful we need leaders who bring self-awareness of their humanity to lead others with authenticity, and a strong desire to help their team thrive.

Andrew Sherman is founderand coach at askcoaching.

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Three ways to be a more psychologically supportive leader in 2020 - AdNews

Handling negative situations just sort of comes with the territory of being a human being, whether theyre just small inconveniences or major problems. While difficult situations and people cant always be avoided, you dont have to get sucked into a negative mindset. Taking steps to seek out positive new relationships and experiences can help you counter negativity and help you to grow as a person.

So how do you begin to banish negativity from your daily life? We asked a panel of Forbes Coaches Council members to give their best advice. Read on to learn how to retrain your brain and embrace positivity.

Forbes Coaches Council members share advice for bringing yourself out of a negative mindset and seeking positivity.

1. Understand The Root Cause Of Your Negativity

Asking questions is key, and not enough people do this. What is the root cause of the negativity? Is it your circle of friends? Is it fear of failure? Unworthiness? You get the point. When you know where the negativity stems from, you are in a position to acknowledge it, tackle it head-on and, most importantly, learn from it. Then go listen to your favorite motivational podcast. - Erin Miller, Erin Miller INC

2. Go On A 'Thankfulness Tour'

When is the last time you went through your day being thankful for every little thing? Go on a thankfulness tour. Find everything that brings you joy, from a sunrise to a good friend. Fill your life with joy because the one person you listen to the most is you! Start practicing positive, joyful self-talk. Eliminate anything negative from your life and watch your life fill with positivity. - Dr. Teresa Ray, PCC, Dr. Teresa Ray

3. Create A Positive Daily Practice

Banishing negativity begins by creating a daily practice of positivity. Establish an enjoyable morning routine that's inspiring and nourishing. This will set a powerful tone for the day. Your daily practice might include gratitude, journaling, meditation and exercise. By cultivating positivity daily, you will move through negative experiences and away from negative people with grace and ease. - Gina Lavery, Gina Lavery Inc.

4. Accept That Negative Thoughts Exist

One thing I see happen when people try to "banish" negative thoughts is that they believe that there will be a point where every single thought will be perfectly positive, always and forever. This is simply not true, and anyone trying to say otherwise is trying to sell you something. When we accept that negative thoughts will come, we can also accept that we don't have to listen to those thoughts. - Cody Dakota Wooten, The Leadership Guide

5. Cultivate A Positive Environment

One way to banish negativity is to establish what you listen to and see all day. Staying away from the news or music that is not of positive disposition is key. We can not underestimate our surroundings. Our environment sometimes dictates how we feel and act. Therefore, pay attention to your environment at home and at work. This will help you grow and stay positive when negativity is prevalent. - Adriana Rosales, Adriana & Company LLC

6. Change The Voice In Your Head

"Fire" the negative voice in your head that is getting in your way. "Hire" an inner-champion. Arm yourself with positive aspirations and personal success stories. Be sure to repeat these often. Take the time to shape a positive vision for your future and gather evidence that you are moving forward. Then, when the voice in your head starts with the negativity, present evidence to the contrary. - Jennifer Owen-O'Quill, Voltage Leadership Consulting

7. Study Your Own Energy Patterns

You attract the energy that you are. If you're able to alter your own energy patterns, you won't have to focus on seeking out positive relationships. Instead of you seeking them out, they'll be drawn to you. Ever heard of "like attracts like?" If your energy system is aligned with universal energy, you won't need to worry about keeping negativity at bay. Growth will be a natural consequence. - Anjali Chugh, Cosmique Global Inc

8. Let Go Of What You Can't Change

At some point , I came to the realization that I was wasting anger on things I could not change. Without any real hacks, I just focused on figuring out if I was burning emotional energy (and making others miserable) on things out of my control. It was an easy fix. Try it, and you will banish a lot of negativity both in you and around you. - Tom Kolditz, Doerr Institute for New Leaders

9. Practice Mindfulness

Practicing mindfulness is one of the best ways to catch yourself before you dive headfirst into a rabbit hole of despair, aka negative habit holes. Instead of replaying negative thoughts, you simply notice the thoughts that are popping up in your mind, observe them and gently let them dissipate, releasing them. Learning to detach from the noisy mind junk is healing, empowering and powerful. - Debbie Ince, Executive Talent Finders, Inc

10. Combine Positivity With Realism And Hard Work

Being positive is a step in the right direction. However, meaningful success requires positivity to be combined with two other elements. The first is realism: the ability to be realistic about the facts and circumstances of life grounds our positivity. The second is hard work because success requires enormous effort. Positive, realistic and hardworking is the most successful combination. - Antonia Bowring, ABstrategies LLC

11. Take Time To Connect With Others

A time management study reveals that one of the four items we neglect is connecting with people. Reconnecting or building new connections allows us to move away from negative relationships. Establishing "good company"a network of people who are tuned into our vibe and have our best interests at heartis not only healthy, but also will force us to evolve through introspection and self-awareness. - Rita Coco, Rita Coco Consulting

12. Affirm And Appreciate Yourself

Embrace the fact that universal principles and people are not developed to give you favor. In daily interactions, claim your authentic self. Make a decision to work on self-awareness skills regarding the transfer of positive and negative energy when interacting with others. You are personally empowered to remove all people, places and circumstances that hinder you from being your authentic self. - Eugene Frazier, EF Choice & Associates, LLC

13. Reframe Your Thoughts As 'I Get To...'

I was recently introduced to the concept of saying, "I get to..." versus the language that we typically use, "I have to..." (e.g. "I have to go to work," "I have to do laundry," "I have to pick up my kids.") Seems like such a simple thing, but shifting that one word shifts the mindset and the outcome from a drudgery to a blessing. Change your language, change your mindset, change your world! - Annette Franz, CX Journey Inc.

14. Switch To A Growth Mindset

Switching your beliefs from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset begins with self-awareness and evolves from a state of wanting something new and different. When we engage in having a growth mindset and focusing on the enhancement and improvement of the process with focused energy, we are open to learning, inspiration, growth and having positive, lasting behaviors, relationships and outcomes. - Lori Harris, Harris Whitesell Consulting

15. Get Off Your Phone

The best way to build positive relationships is still good old face-to-face interactions. While our phones are amazing tools, they're simply thattools. The easiest way to start building relationships with those around you is to put the phone down, look up and smile. The next thing you know, that smile leads to a conversation, and a conversation leads to a relationship. - Alex Rufatto Perry, Practically Speaking, LLC

Link:
15 Ways To Banish Negativity And Embrace The Positive In Life - Forbes

Friends, my time here as a contributing writer for Premier Guitar is coming to a close. My intention was that this could be where the discussion of objects could become a venue for the consideration of ideas. A sincere thank you goes out to PG editors Shawn Hammond, Ted Drozdowski, Tessa Jeffers, and Joe Gore for the opportunity, and their patience with what Ive wanted to say and the manner in which Ive said it.

As readers, sometimes your feedback changed the way I think; at others, it confirmed my suspicions. Like every other piece of technology in our modern age, there is a balancing act between utility, art, design, and commerce where each of us stakes out our preferences and our reasons why. I would hesitate to say theres an objective right and wrongbut I certainly have my own opinions on things, and I thank you for taking the time to consider and reply to them. I leave you with this.

The electric guitar might just be another electronic instrument, but I think its still the best electronic instrument. Keytars are good for conspicuous displays of ironic consumption, but they dont actually look cool. Surrounding yourself with stacks of keyboards makes you Tony Banks of Genesis, at best. Modular synths turn users into 1920s telephone operators. And like someone who feels compelled to operate an imaginary steering wheel in a self-driving vehicle, anyone onstage vigorously moving around their groove production controller that they tap once a song section looks kind of ridiculous.

Much like muscle cars, monster trucks, lightsabers, bazookas, and being a princess with secret world-altering magical powers, guitars still appeal to our base, childlike, lizard brains with a special cocktail of power and cool. Theres a reason any thick fashion magazine full of viral affluenza ads always has at least one expensive-looking photo of a model awkwardly holding whatever guitar the crew could borrow. It hearkens to a legacy of loud defiance that goes back to Cashs middle finger, Hendrixs matches and lighter fluid, the cover of London Calling, and thousands of other images seared into our imaginations.

Sometimes, its just a chicken sandwich because the family is hungry and this is the exit.

But behind the artifice and styleand artifice and style do matterthe electronic content of the electric guitar is still really cool. I once dismissively described the balls to ovary birth story of your favorite tones as the furthest thing from natural, but it doesnt make them any less awesome. A spool of wire wrapped around magnets is no more sophisticated than a fifth graders science project, but the voltage created by its field getting broken by the vibrations of a plucked string can be harmonically rich, dynamically responsive, and immediate in ways that are special and unlike anything else in music. The effects pedals weve described here can vary from the medieval to sophisticated, but there is wonder and liberty in choosing exactly which devices sound best, look the coolest, and feel inspiring and fun to use. And then the amps! Whether you direct your sonic path to your laptop or plug into an old tube amp, each device creates its own magic and constraints for how you want to use it. At their best, each of the tools in your signal chain can have character and personality that contributes towards your sound.

In the end, it really isnt about the gear. It sounds either hopelessly naive or self-defeating for a gear maker to say this in an era where people signal their virtues by their choice in chicken sandwiches, but Im going to say it out loud: You are not what you buy. You are not the tuner you bought right before a show, the fuzz you scored at the flea market, or the amp you ordered after reading pages of effusive testimonials. Im for people making well-informed decisions about the equipment they own and the people who make it, voting with their dollars for things that bring them the most joy and the least dissonance with their values and needs. But sometimes, its just a chicken sandwich because the family is hungry and this is the exit. Sometimes its just the overdrive thats available and you need to save gas money for the drive home after these shows. And sometimes, its the amp you dropped way too much money on that just isnt for you. You dont have to let these things define you, because they dont.

I was genuinely moved by a post from an acclaimed electronic musician who had once been so committed to the traditional ideal of the guitar-playing singer-songwriter that she was making herself miserable. I think its a miracle that she found her voice and joy in other genres and technology, making trash beats and arranging loops until she became really good at it. Id encourage a similar sense of discovery and self-awareness within or outside of whatever instrument you play. In the end, its just the stuff we use to make music and sound. Make the sounds you dream of making, get the tools to do it, and be true to the pursuits that make you happiest. Even if some guy in a guitar mag thinks you look a little ridiculous.

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State of the Stomp: It's All About Wonder and Liberty - Premier Guitar

With the arrival of season three of the Emmy award-winning Amazon show The Marvelous Mrs Maisel, Tara Ward explains her topsy-turvy love affair with the shows infuriating heroine.

When season one of The Marvelous Mrs Maisel burst onto our screens in 2017, it was love at first sight. After years of watching nightmarish shows about tortured handmaids and Swedish murders, the candy-coloured Maisel was a welcome breath of fresh air. Created by the team behind Gilmore Girls, the show is a gorgeous whirlwind of fabulous costumes, a barrage of rapid fire dialogue that made you laugh out loud, and a feminist story about a brave woman who, when the shit hits the fan, gets her boobs out and starts cracking the funnies.

Rachel Brosnahan as Midge Maisel.

The funny woman is Miriam Midge Maisel (Rachel Brosnahan, who won an Emmy and two Golden Globes for this role). In episode one, Midge is happily fulfilling her destiny as an upper-class Jewish housewife and mother in 1950s New York, but it all goes tits up/boobs out when her husband Joel announces hes in love with his secretary, Penny Pann. Penny Pann! The names as ridiculous as the whole situation, and Midge does what every self-respecting woman does when they realise a tasty casserole isnt enough to save a marriage: she gets drunk, goes out in her nightie, tells some dirty jokes and gets arrested.

Who wouldnt fall in love with a smart, sassy heroine like Midge? While her family and friends reel from the shame of her divorce, Midge steps into the (spot)light and reinvents herself as a stand-up comedian. Comedy gives Midge the freedom to vent her anger and frustrations, and helps her make sense of her new life. She fights to be taken seriously, both as a single woman and a female comic, and shes not afraid to call out gender stereotypes and double standards. Comedy is fuelled by oppression, by the lack of power, by sadness and disappointment, by abandonment and humiliation. Now, who the hell does that describe more than women? Judging by those standards, only women should be funny, she says.

I fell hard for Midge in season one, but like Joels feelings for Penny Pann, something changed. While characters like Midges parents Rose and Abe evolved and grew during seasons two and three (which arrived on Amazon Prime earlier this month), Midges journey of self discovery stalled. Instead of being inspired by Midges bravery, I became frustrated by her lack of self awareness. Her bedroom filled with clothes and her love of shopping annoyed me. She remained naive and impulsive, an immaculately dressed tornado blustering into every room. There was no challenge she couldnt conquer, no crowd she couldnt charm. It was too much. Midge was too much. I was in her corner, but sheesh, Midge could be exhausting.

I began to wonder if Midge and I needed to take a break. I couldnt reconcile the Midge who wants independence with the Midge who leaves her baby in the car on holiday and orders the hired help to bring it inside. Midge gets to kick comedy butt on stage because she lives with her wealthy parents who employ a maid and can babysit at the drop of a hat, privileges which Midge rarely acknowledges. Midge gets older but not necessarily wiser, and its as frustrating as the time she was eliminated from a hectic game of Simon Says in the Catskills for touching her nose when Simon did not say Simon Says. By that, I mean a lot.

If Midges whole shtick is that shes a single mother building a career in stand-up, Id love to see The Marvelous Mrs Maisellean in harder and let Midge face more of the challenges of a working parent, instead of protecting her from them. Im thinking constant childcare juggling or endless loads of washing or being so exhausted you fall asleep at 7:30pm in front of a Love Islandmarathon with biscuit crumbs stuck down your bra that youll discover the next morning all melted and smooshed, but eat them anyway. Or so Ive heard.

Praise be to the Tupperware gods, then, for Susie Meyerson (two-time Emmy Award winner Alex Borstein), Midges wonderfully sarcastic manager. Shes the dark to Midges light, the rough to her smooth, the socially awkward to Midges polished socialite. Its Susie who encourages Midge to do the unthinkable and become a comedian, and when Midge flies too high, Susies brutal honesty keeps both Midge and the show grounded. Susie keeps you coming back for more.

Together, Midge and Susie are the beating heart of The Marvelous Mrs Maisel, because they have faith in each other when nobody else does. They both work in a mans world, each pushing back on societal expectations about how women should behave. Their partnership is tested during season three, but essentially theyre a team taking on the world, one stand-up show at a time. Alone, Im a spittoon. With you, Im a somebody, Susie tells Midge.

Season three ends at a turning point for Midge, which means I cant break up with her yet. Like a good, strong girdle, this is a love that cant be undone, just loosened enough to catch your breath and ask what the fork is happening here? Its not perfect, but The Marvelous Mrs Maiselis still a colourful, sharp-witted show that knows how to spark joy, and thats mostly down its two intelligent and funny heroines. I have faith in Mrs Maisel, because you get the feeling that whatever happens, shes going to do great things. Tits up, thank you and goodnight.

Seasons 1-3 of The Marvelous Mrs Maisel are streaming on Amazon Prime Video.

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No more yuks: Falling in and out of love with The Marvelous Mrs Maisel - The Spinoff

Sterling Brown picked off the pass. He threw ahead to Pat Connaughton. He pushed and then dropped it back to George Hill. He swung to Ersan Ilyasova. He went to the paint and kicked to Robin Lopez.

In those 11 seconds, each of the five players on the Bucks made space and rhythm for a teammate. It culminated in this Lopez triple. There was not a Cavalier within ten feet of him.

This was just one play, but it is representative of bench-based lineups since the start of the year. More than a quarter through the season, the Bucks statistically have the second best bench unit in the league.

Bench: Differential Per Game (201920) 1. Mavericks: +5.6 2. Bucks: +4.1 3. Lakers: +3.7 4. Clippers: +3.4 5. Pistons: +1.8

Their bench also ranks second in the league in minutes per game, with only the Clippers giving slightly more time to their reserves, largely because they technically bring two guys (Lou Williams and Montrezl Harrell) off the bench who are actually part of their core closing lineup.

When the Clippers came to Milwaukee last week, they were outscored by a combined 59 points when Williams and Harrell were on the court. In what was expected to be a showdown featuring not only two of the best starting units in the league, but two of the best benches as well,Milwaukees reserves helped blow the game open. Most of the second half was mop-up time, which for the Bucks means rolling out one of the best benches not only this season but in recent league history.

Bench: Differential Per Game (since 2000) 1. Mavericks: +5.6 (201920) 2. Bucks: +4.1 (201920) 3. Spurs: +3.9 (201516) 4. Spurs: +3.8 (201314) 5. Spurs: +3.7 (201112) 6. Lakers: +3.7 (201920) 7. Raptors: +3.6 (201718) 8. Bulls: +3.5 (201112) 9. Spurs: +3.4 (201617) 10. Clippers: +3.4 (201920)

They are up there with some memorable bench squads. Kyle Korver was raining threes for that Bulls team, on a bench that also included prime Taj Gibson and rookie Jimmy Butler (who was not yet getting rotation minutes). The Raptors featured budding Pascal Siakam and Fred VanVleet, guys who would figure centrally in bringing them a title the next season. Pick your favorite Spurs bench: The 201314 title-winning supernova brought Manu Ginobili, Boris Diaw, Marco Belinelli, and Patty Mills off the bench, while the 201112 version had Kawhi Leonard coming off the bench for 25 games in the regular season before blooming in the playoffs.

The Bucks are 100 this season when they are missing a starter, and withEric Bledose expected to be out for approximately two weeks, their depth will be tested. Outside of the core starting five,Donte DiVincenzo has filled in as a starter most often among the reserves and has played very well in that role. He is a natural when it comes to understanding the pace and the angles of the game. Here he freezes the defense before delivering a handoff to set up Giannis for an easy finish.

Coming off excellent postseason runs last year, George Hill and Ersan Ilyasova might be the headiest and steadiest bench duo in the league. Hill leads the NBA in three-point percentage (by far, at 53.4%) and has the fifth-best assist-to-turnover ratio in the league, while Ilyasova as always ranks among the league leaders in charges drawn and self-awareness.Sterling Brown still has the best Defensive Rating in the NBA. Robin Lopez is starting to hit threes. D.J. Wilson has taken another step forward. Kyle Korver still has defenses lunging. Pat Connaughton still blocking jump-shooters, still cramming on the unsuspecting is having the best year of his career (again).

Statistically, the Bucks so far are one of the most dominant teams of all-time based on point differential. As a result, for the second straight season, they have a built-in, natural load management approach. Which is to say, they are killing teams, their bench comes in and makes it worse for opponents, and along the way Giannis plays like one of the best players ever, in a modest number of minutes. This season, he is averaging the fewest minutes since his rookie season.

Giannis: Minutes Per Game 201314: 24.6 201415: 31.4 201516: 35.3 201617: 35.6 201718: 36.7 201819: 32.8 201920: 31.1

Depth will help the Bucks push for homecourt advantage throughout the playoffs. Once they get there, some might be thinking, well a great bench is great, but what you really need is an elite starting lineup.

Bad news for people who are looking for bad news about the Bucks:

Starters: Differential Per Game (201920) 1. Bucks: +9.4 2. Lakers: +5.9 3. Sixers: +4.7 4. Heat: +4.0 5. Clippers: +3.5

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The Bucks Have A Great Bench | Milwaukee Bucks - Bucks.com

Childrens services in West Sussex will be run by an independent trust after a Department for Education report found there had been inadequate and ineffective leadership from the county council.

On the back of the report from commissioner John Coughlan, Becky Shaw, the chief executive officer at East Sussex will also take over the running of West Sussex.

In his report, Mr Coughlan said: The conditions required to support the essential sustainable improvement in West Sussex childrens services, regrettably, do not currently exist within the county council.

Further, the extent of the current malaise in the organisation strongly indicates that those conditions will probably not reliably exist for some considerable time.

Mr Coughlan, who is also chief executive of Hampshire County Council, will lead the process for the next 12 months, with his council acting as an improvement partner to drive forward the improvements needed.

The report was published by the Department for Education less than one hour before it was due to be discussed at County Hall today (Tuesday December 17).

Members spoke of their shame at the contents, with leader Paul Marshall saying it was not pleasant reading.

The work of Mr Marshall, in his then role as cabinet member for childrens services, and John Readman, interim director of childrens services, was arguably the only highlight of the report.

The rest spoke of a local authority that had not only lost its way on this matter but was not interested in hearing that things had gone wrong.

Mr Coughlans report spoke of a lack of organisational self-awareness and a refusal to accept criticism or bad

news and then to address problems.

He describeddisturbingly low levels of awareness of what good social work practice looks like, a perception among current and former staff of a significant bullying problem and a systemic and prolonged failure of childrens services in the county.

Some 150 detailed interviews with staff were carried out while the final report was being prepared.

When it came to former chief executive Nathan Elvery, Mr Coughlans report said the over-arching theme of his submissionwas less anargument about some of the findings of this report and more a contention about where the cause or blame may lay for those findings.

The lack of stability among senior management has long been cause for concern and was described as alarming by Mr Coughlan.

In her submission to his report,former leader Louise Goldsmithimplied that blaming herself and other politicians for any recruitment and retention issues is unjust and solely intended to damage her character.

A Freedom of Information request revealed that, as of October 15, eight positions within the children and families leadership team were only being filled on an interim basis at a median rate of 800 a day.

Mr Readman himself will be leaving the council in January to take up a post at Cumbria County Council.

A spokesman said the search for a permanent replacement had already started.

Mr Marshall said: The Department for Education report is painful to read and shows the scale of the problems we face. We acknowledge and fully accept the recommendations.

I apologise to the children and families we support and council staff right across the authority for failing to create the environment where our childrens services can run well and effectively.

I want to personally thank our staff in particular our childrens services staff for their professionalism and dedication to our residents during what has been an uncertain time.

We accept and understand the secretary of states decision. I want what is best for the children we support in West Sussex.

The rest is here:
Childrens services in West Sussex will be run by an independent trust - Chichester Observer

caption Major artists released both excellent and lackluster singles in 2019. source Aidan Cullen / Maroon 5/YouTube

2019 was an incredible year for music especially for women, as it was peppered by career highlights from artists like Ariana Grande, Billie Eilish, Taylor Swift, Lana Del Rey, Halsey, and Dua Lipa (honorable mentions include Selena Gomezs comeback ballad Lose You to Love Me, Rosalas eclectic stream of singles, and excellent albums from Charli XCX and FKA Twigs).

Other songs, however, marred the years reputation. Respected artists like Miley Cyrus, Kanye West, and Maroon 5 had some major missteps.

Keep reading for Insiders roundup of the highs and lows from the past year in chronological order, starting with the very best.

Needy is one of the most arresting and moving songs in Ariana Grandes catalogue. The sparkling, synth-laden ballad is the tender heart of Thank U, Next, Grandes best and most personal album to date.

The intimate song evokes the impending doom of a failing relationship: apologies sent via text, going to bed without saying goodnight, the lonely echo of an empty apartment. It clocks in at under three minutes, and yet manages to synthesize a veritable feast of emotions: longing, guilt, resentment, desire, quiet dread. Put simply, Needy is mesmerizing, acting as both confession and catharsis.

Sucker was the perfect comeback song for this centurys most beloved trio. After an agonizing six-year breakup, the Jonas Brothers couldve released any kind of catchy radio hit or Burnin Up knockoff and it wouldve been embraced by fans. Instead, they returned with a delightfully weird, tropical pop-rock banger and triumphantly asserted their dominant role in 2019 as more than a nostalgic fluke.

This is one of the rare times that an artists song one that wasnt even released as a lead single for her album, one that she actually thought people would hate has eclipsed the one that made her famous.

Bad Guy has become Billie Eilishs defining anthem, illustrating the unconventional spooky pop that has made her so beloved.

Released just before we head into the next decade, Bad Guy already feels like something well remember as the inspiration behind many copycats, as a song that paved the way for a new kind of radio hit and perhaps as more than Eilishs defining anthem, but a generations. Insider previously ranked it as the 41st best song of the 2010s decade.

Earfquake is best heard within the context of Igor, Tyler, the Creators best and most cohesive album to date. As with many albums that, in the words of Pitchforks Matthew Strauss, succeed in communicating mood as their own sense of logic, the song elevates and is elevated by the songs that surround it.

However, as the albums lead single, Earfquake also stood on its own before it existed within the context of Igor and it clearly succeeded, having become Tylers best-selling and highest-charting song to date.

Earfquake introduced us to Tylers newest alter-ego and, after 2017s Flower Boy was hailed as his most mature album yet, proved that hes nowhere near done evolving.

Earfquake illustrates Tylers talent for innovation and artistic growth, especially as hes the sole producer and only one of two writers on the song. His pitched-up falsetto, gliding through the songs mutating, colorful chords, make listening to Earfquake feel like a surrealist experience (in Tylers own words, the harmonies sound like a cloud melting).

Lover already feels like an indispensable addition to Taylor Swifts discography. The dreamy, Mazzy Star-esque ballad, written entirely by Swift herself, has been nominated for song of the year at the 2020 Grammys and was ranked by Insider as one of the best songs of the 2010s decade.

After years of singing about love stories based in fantasy and embellishing the details of failed courtships, Lover sees Swift grow into herself. She writes with striking maturity but maintains her characteristic flair for drama, beautifully capturing the atmosphere within a lasting love a place of security and frustration and comfort and understanding and persistent, abiding, Ill-run-away-with-you-if-you-ask passion.

Its extraordinarily difficult to pick a best song from Lana Del Reys enchanting album Norman Fing Rockwell! her most poetic, consistent, and critically acclaimed to date.

That being said: Godd manchild, you fed me so good that I almost said, I love you.' If that isnt an ingenious way to open an album, then I dont know what is. Most artists dont achieve momentary, transcendental brilliance like that ever, let alone within the first 45 seconds of track one.

Halsey is as much a writer, if not more so, than a singer or hitmaker. She often describes her onstage career as a way to ensure that people listen to her words and understand her emotions a drive thats never been more apparent than on Clementine, an intimate, glittering ode to self-awareness that started off as a poem about having a black eye.

The spare production allows Halseys theatrical charisma to take center stage: When my hair stands on end its saluting you is a standout line, as well as the songs central refrain: I dont need anyone, I just need everyone and then some. The latter is echoed by pouts and wails in the background (I dont need anyone! I dont need anyone!), giving the song a weird, slightly unhinged quality that makes it all the more brilliant.

Dua Lipas disco-infused single Dont Start Now maximizes everything the pop star does best.

Lipa reunited with the team behind her formidable, catchy breakthrough hit New Rules, but Dont Start Now takes her sound to a higher level, Rolling Stones Brittany Spanos wrote. Above one of the years strongest bass lines, Lipa vocally struts her way through a Studio 54 fantasy. With biting sass, she tells a lover who has left her scorned that she has happily moved on.

The song is the peak of pop catharsis: it unfolds into one of the years most glamorous new tunes. You wish you could see Bianca Jagger ride into the club on a white horse as this song plays in the distance.

When Insiders entertainment team ranked every solo song Harry Styles has released, rating each song on a scale from 1-10 and then averaging the scores, we near-unanimously decided that Cherry is his best song yet. Courteney Larocca gave it an immediate 10/10 after one listen, while Paige DiFiore and I both ignored the 1-10 rule to come up with a 100/10 and 11/10, respectively.

As Larocca wrote, Theres a tenderness in Styles vocals on Cherry that, along with the Camille Rowe voice note at the end, helps drive home the beautifully melancholic tone.

With lyrics like, I, I confessI can tell that you areat your best / Im selfish so Im hating it, and Does he take you walking round his parents gallery? Styles leans into his jealous side, crafting the most powerful moment on Fine Line,' she wrote. Cherry is an instant classic that elevated Styles artistry to new heights.

This soulless, phoned-in pop song tries so hard to be a female empowerment anthem, but mostly just feels like fodder for the Avril Lavigne was replaced with a body double conspiracy theory. I refuse to believe the emo queen of my childhood, the punk-rock genius who brought us Complicated and My Happy Ending, also brought us Dumb Blonde.

Not for nothing, it was also a weird choice for Nicki Minaj to cosign a song that prominently features the lyric I aint no dumb blonde / I aint no stupid Barbie doll when she has spent her entire career creatively reclaiming the Barbie image (her fans literally call themselves Barbz).

First of all, theres already a dance track from a DJ called Light It Up and its way better. Marshmellos is empty and colorless. Second of all, has Tygas voice always sounded so nasally and weird?

Thirdly and most importantly, as Ive noted before, nobody benefits from Chris Browns continued presence in the music industry. Considering his growing list of disturbing accusations over the years including but not limited to assault, abuse, and rape its a mystery and a disgrace that artists continue to insist on collaborating with him.

Earlier this year, Insiders own Courteney Larocca listed Me! among Taylor Swifts worst songs ever.

Longtime fans know Swifts lead singles tend to be red herrings, and Me! might be the best example of a leading track expertly masking the overall feel of the album its meant to promote, she wrote. But on what has been described as Swifts most indie-leaning record to date, Me! is a sugary, too-sweet outlier fit for the Frozen demographic and not much else.

Of the six songs on Miley Cyrus eclectic EP, as Idolators Mike Nied wrote, Cattitude is her most glaring stumble. But the song isnt just the worst of the small bunch its downright unlistenable. Put next to some of Cyrus most enticingly edgy music in years (Mothers Daugher, Unholy), its even more cringey.

Cattitude is proudly unserious, but its also kind of embarrassing. Turn up your gratitude, turn down your attitude / I love my pussy, that means I got cattitude packs the energy of a self-help slogan and a rejected Lizzo track, Pitchforks Anna Gaca wrote. Cattitude is entertaining, sure, but whos being entertained?

If theres a worst song on Iggy Azaleas terrible album In My Defense, Clap Back comes pretty close. It sees Azalea addressing hatin broke h whove accused her of cultural appropriation with super sophisticated insights like, Cause I talk like this and my a fat / They be saying Iggy tryna act black. Um, right!

As Dani Blum wrote for Pitchfork, the song offers only a garish caricature of rap music: They call me racist / Only thing I like is green and blue faces, she sneers, managing to corrode and embarrass herself in one line.

Hot Girl Bummer isnt just a transparent attempt to ride the coattails of Megan Thee Stallions motto-turned-anthem, Hot Girl Summer (giving something a name thats similar to an already-popular search phrase is an easy way to get extra eyeballs or, in this case, ears, on it). Its also just an inauthentic song with a gimmicky, uber-repetitive hook.

At least Girls Like You was catchy and featured a Cardi B verse. But Maroon 5s newest single Memories is desperately generic. Theres just nothing to it; no meat, no intrigue.

Although its very touching that Adam Levine dedicated the music video to Jordan Feldstein, the bands manager who died in 2017, the actual song doesnt contain any touching details or any specificity at all, preferring to parrot tiresome clichs.

Its hard to believe the man behind lyrical masterpieces like Black Skinhead and Runaway actually wrote and released a song thats all about comparing his iconic wife to Chick-fil-A.

Its nice that Kanye West feels like hes found his purpose, but did that mean he had to become such a mediocre songwriter? Some of Wests best songs (Jesus Walks, Ultralight Beam) are gospel-heavy records, directly inspired by his religious devotion, so Im not sure what his excuse is for such a weak and, honestly, offensively deficient metaphor. (Kim Kardashian West is an effective prison reform advocate and business mogul whos changed the fabric of fame as we know it. Chick-fil-A is a fast food joint thats best known worldwide for being owned by a homophobe. Spot the disparity?)

Even aside from the songs central references to fried chicken and lemonade, theres nothing here of interest.

Closed on Sunday, you my Chick-fil-A / Hold the selfies, put the gram away / Get your family, yall, hold hands and pray, West recites lazily, sounding like hes even boring himself. Thats your life-changing insight, Ye? Yikes.

Aside from being a baseline bad song, Both Ways the 10th track on Liam Paynes new solo album is a pretty gross depiction of women being attracted to other women.

Lovin the way that shes turning you on / Switching the lanes like a Bugatti Sport / Nothing but luck that she got me involved, yeah / Flipping that body, go head, I go tails, Payne sings in the songs refrain. He also brags that he wont judge and that his girls sexuality makes every day feel like his birthday.

The lyrics have drawn heavy criticism from the LGBTQ community. As explained by Cosmo UKs sex and relationships editor, Paisley Gilmour: Bisexual women and femme-presenting people are so often subjected to this kind of fetishization the idea that their sexuality exists to arouse straight, cis dudes. Its a misconception that contributes to bisexual erasure (when bisexual peoples sexuality is repeatedly ignored, denied existence or just plain questioned).

Original post:
The 9 best and 9 worst songs of the year - Business Insider

* Cole Lauterbach at the Center Square on Mayor Lori Lightfoots unsuccessful veto session bid to change the state gaming law to help Chicago land a casino

But her lobbying efforts hit a roadblock when news broke that a state lawmaker had been arrested for allegedly offering a state senator who had been wearing a federal wiretap a series of bribes in exchange for supporting another piece of gambling legislation.

It didnt help that, on the very first day of veto session, there was a criminal charge announced of a legislator around gaming, Lightfoot told the Economic Club of Chicago. I felt like at that point we may not even be in the conversation.

As the veto session came to a close, it became clear that Lightfoot would come up short. She revealed Tuesday just how close it was.

By our whip count, we had fifty-five votes in the House and we needed sixty so we were close despite those odds, she said.

One of the difficulties she said her team ran up against was a legislative effort to add what she called tinsel to the Christmas tree, or markup the bill with add-ons they wanted.

They saw this piece of legislation, particularly around casinos, as their one opportunity to get something that they felt they were promised, she said. People came out of the woodwork with their letters to Santa.

The impetus for the change in the already passed gambling legislation was a report that said the tax and fee structure for a Chicago casino was too high to attract a developer.

Lightfoot said she was confident an agreement could be reached when lawmakers return to Springfield in 2020.

Legislators were, indeed, asking for a lot of stuff. Some thought they had an agreement with the mayor and then others jumped in when they saw goodies being passed out.

Its never easy to pass a gaming bill, particularly a stand-alone bill like this one which the mayor tried to muscle through in a hurry.

Adding Some good points here

Yep.

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Your Illinois News Radar Lightfoot on gaming bill failure: People came out of the woodwork with their 'letters to Santa' - The Capitol Fax Blog