They say, Time flies when youre having fun, and no disrespect to my daughters, but I dont think it was just the fun part that made these past six years fly by so fast. I would include an addendum to that oft-quoted phrase and say, Time also flies when youre incredibly busy. My days are full to overflowing. After my wife and I return from our full-time jobs, our real job begins at home, making sure our daughters are fed, bathed, and dressed and arent causing too much mischief, e.g., tipping our CD tower over. (Yes, we still have a CD tower.)

Despite all the work, theyre worth it. Of course they are. (Can you imagine this essay if I thought they werent?) Theyre not only worth it because I love them, but because Ive managed to learn a lot in the blink of an eye that constitutes the better part of the last decade. Here are the lessons theyve taught me that I think about in my nonexistent spare time.

Unfortunately, Im one of the most impatient people on the planet, and that doesnt bode well when you have children who insist on flipping over on their changing tables when youre trying to replace their diapers or love to sing high notes at 3 in the morningevery morning. There were times Ihad to walk away and take a breather. This parenting thing isnt easy, and its made me realize I am in definite short supply of the thing you need the most when taking care of children. And Im still working on it. I know itll be a never-ending process until they reach their teensand then I may as well give up. I dont know how single parents do it.

This story was submitted by a Fatherly reader. Opinions expressed in the story do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Fatherly as a publication. The fact that were printing the story does, however, reflect a belief that it is an interesting and worthwhile read.

Im one of the most nostalgic people Ive ever known, but the truth remains that nostalgia isnt real. Actually, let me clarify: the feeling of nostalgia is certainly real, but the idea that the past was always great, and the present/future is and will always be rotten is just a lie.

Nothing makes me realize this more than when Im with my daughters. Theyre enjoying life so much right now, smiling at almost anything they see, but thats mostly because theyre nave. (Ignorance is bliss, as they say.) They dont know that gun violence kills thousands of Americans every year, that racism is a rampant problem, and were still at war in the Middle East after almost two decades. But years from now as they grow up, theyll look back at what they can remember and say the 2010s were such grand times, just like I think 1989 is the greatest year in recorded history when it was equally troubled. (Well, the Berlin Wall came down that year, so there was that.)

I once had a conversation with my Dad when he asked me all these questions about the internet, Microsoft Word, and other technological marvels of our Brave New World. At that point, he was retired for a few years, but even if he wasnt, he never really worked with computers anywayat least not how we use them now. So I was dumbfounded by his questions. Why should you care about all this new stuff anyway? I asked, and his answer blindsided me: Because if I stop learning, I may as well be dead.

He was right.

Being a semiserious student when I was younger, I have to admit I was more interested in achieving high grades than in the actual learning process. What I learned any given week in school was just a byproduct of trying to make it to the next class and the next grade, which I realize now really shouldnt have been the way to go about it. It reminds me of the old Calvin and Hobbes cartoon when Calvin brags to his teacher that he memorized some useless information he learned in class just long enough to pass a test and now will happily forget it for the rest of his life. I used to have the quadratic formula memorized, but if someone stopped me on the street and put a gun to my head in order to extract that information now, Id be dead.

But I can see this process, the literal joy of learning, on my daughters faces. Luckily, they dont seem to be so stubbornly lazy as me when it comes to acquiring new information. From working out simple puzzles in their toys to remembering how to spell the word apple, theyre literally learning dozens of new things every day, even if I cant see all of it yet. Of course, one day I will, and it will all be because they wanted to learn in the first place. After all, like my Dad astutely put it, theyre not dead yet.

When I was a kid in 1988, I watched Happy Birthday, Garfield, a television special dedicated to the 10th anniversary of the titular fat cat, and a little after the intro to the show, creator/cartoonist Jim Davis explained that if theres anything to take away from Garfield the comic strip and Garfield the character, its this: Hey, lifes not so bad.

I was horrified.

Of course, Davis was looking for the opposite reaction, but my mind was moving so quickly that I immediately thought, Well, why would he need to say that unless life is bad? What are the adults not telling us?! I grew into that unfortunate mental attitude as I got older, even suffering several bouts of depression.

Still, my daughters remind me of this line every day, and they also taught me that Davis is right. Life really isnt so bad, at least for most of us. I cant speak about people suffering in third-world countries, but for the majority of us, its not exactly a daily struggleor at least it doesnt have to be (and if youre reading this, it means you have both access to the Internet and the money for a computer and/or smartphone, so your life cant be that bad either). My daughters see things in the world that I forgot to marvel about, which brings me to my last point.

Its easy to forget being amazed at magnets and planes flying overhead but easier to remember when youve got a 3- and 6-year-old living with you. After my wife and I put up our Christmas tree a few years ago, I wish I couldve bottled the look on my younger daughters face. Her eyes lit up like, well, that Christmas tree, and she literally opened her mouth and squealed, Woooah! as if to say, Hey, a tree is growing in the middle of our living room! Howd it get here, Daddy?!

There was a time I was like that, too. I was amazed at flashing Christmas lights hanging across city streets and shiny boxes under the tree. When did I lose that? Not sure, but most us do. I suppose us serious adults are too busy working and paying the bills to take notice, but this Christmas, as I walk home from work and pass The Empire State Building decorated in red and green for the holidays, Im going to at least try to look up in wonder.

Just because life goes fast doesnt mean it isnt beautiful.

Michael Perone is an editor based in New York. He has written for The Baltimore Sun, Baltimore City Paper, and Long Island Voice (a spinoff of the Village Voice),as well as Yahoo!, Whatculture!, and other websites that dont end with an exclamation mark.

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How To Be Happy (According To My Infant Daughters) - Fatherly

A lawsuit brought by his son Jordan Sebuliba at the High court, Civil Division on August 23 2019 roped businessman Mohan Kiwanuka and his immediate family into a legal and media storm that raged for weeks.

But when the final ruling came on September 27, Justice Ssekaana Musa delivered a blow to the applicant Sebuliba.

He said, This issue is resolved in the negative.

The application is dismissed but each party should meet their costs. Since this is partly a family dispute, I would urge the parties to reconcile. (Article 126(2)(d) of the Constitution.)

Sebuliba put his fathers mental health more than anything else at the centre of his lawsuit.Ultimately on September 27, Justice Ssekaana Musa had to determine Whether the respondent (Mohan Kiwanuka) should be examined to determine his medical state of the mind?

Sebuliba in his main plaint claimed, The respondent (Mohan) is believed to be suffering from a debilitating and degenerative condition of Alzheimers or dementia, which is presumed to have been progressive over the last six or so years but has become quite severe and imposing on the respondents health in the recent past.

He asked court to subject the respondent to a medical examination.He said if the examination established that the respondent was of unsound mind then the applicant be appointed as a Personal representative/Manager of the Estate of the respondent.

In his pained determination as to Whether the respondent should be examined mentally? The honourable judge ruled as follows. Below is a slightly edited down version.

========

Final ruling

Applicants Submissions

The applicants counsel submitted that the respondent is not an inmate in the mental hospital nor is he detained in any prison but he is presently residing at Plot 15 Prince Charles drive Kololo in the care of his second spouse Mrs. Maria Kiwanuka.

It is desirable at the onset of this application to have the respondent subjected to medical examinations to determine his mental state on grounds that the respondents caregiver has for a period of three years intentionally and deliberately concealed his medical condition and restricted access to the respondent by his other family members.

The respondent has also barred his family members from accessing and interacting with him at his office. He issued a notice at his office barring four of his sons & daughter from accessing him i.e Jordan Sebuliba who is the applicant, Adnan Ddamula, Jane Kiwanuka, Beatrice Luyiga, who is his spouse and Riad Batanda. That notice was posted at the front gate offices and signed off by the respondent as chairman.

The applicants counsel further submitted that the grounds for belief that the respondent is laboring from a mental defect is in a report from Doctor Farouk Maniyar.

According to the report Maniyar is a consultant neurologist and an honorary senior clinical lecturer. The doctor Farouk wrote his report and says I saw this pleasant 66 years old right handed gentleman who runs his own factory in Uganda, he is visiting the UK with his wife.

He provides for the details of the respondent, his date of birth and the doctor says that he saw the respondent; this was in 2017 when the respondent had visited with his wife in the UK. He goes on to say his wife first noticed some problem with his cognition while visiting their son for his graduation in the USA. For some reason he asked where he was and was a bit confused about it.

The respondent and his wife had travelled to the USA and apparently he had no memory of where he was. Since then his wife feels his memory has gradually worsened. He gets appointments or peoples names, he forgets where he has put his things and uses a diary on which he is quite dependant, he still continues to work.

According to the applicants counsel, this is reasonable ground to believe that the respondent has a mental disorder which impairs him for which he should be medically examined as is premised on this medical report which is dated 2017.

The applicants counsel further contended that the applicant reasonably believes, which belief is based on close and continuous observations and interactions with the respondent together with the reasonable assessment of a doctor in form of a medical assessment report issued to the respondent and the wife in May 2017 that provided clear evidence of some form of progressive cognitive impairment and conclusive proof that the respondent is suffering from debilitating brain degenerative dementia condition otherwise known as Alzheimer disease which medical element has taken firm root and manifested itself in a noticeable decline of the respondents memory, thinking, character and reasoning skills.

It was counsels contention that some of these things are already being manifested in the type of resolutions made in two of his companies.

In the meeting of the directors, the above company held at its premises on 30th May 2019 that: Mrs. Maria Nabasirye Kiwanuka be and is hereby appointed as the director, that Mr. Francis Buwule Kabonge of M/s Buwule, Mayega & Co Advocates be appointed as Company Secretary, and the resolution be filed, the first resolution is in relation to Bwerenga Estates limited and the second one is Summit Limited in which again Mrs. Maria Nabasirye Kiwanuka is appointed as a director.

The applicants counsel contended that this was a grave error since the Directors are appointed by a general meeting but in this case they were appointed by fellow directors, which he believes is contrary to the Companies Act.

Respondents submissions

The respondents counsel in his submission contended that it is a process of inquiry under the Mental Treatment Act that will give this court jurisdiction, the results of an inquiry and a judgment of unsoundness of mind is what will give this court jurisdiction under the Administration of Estates of Persons of Unsound Mind Act.

Secondly, under Rule 3 sub rule 2(d) if a person is not detained in a mental hospital or prison the application must be supported by an affidavit of a medical practitioner stating that he has personally examined the person and found him to be still of unsound mind.

In this case, Mr. Sebulibas affidavit admits that Mr. Kiwanuka and indeed the respondent is not in a mental prison or a mental hospital. Cited these cases Re: Kigundu James Miscellaneous Cause No. 18 of 2015 and Songolo Difasi Mugabo, Miscellaneous Cause No. 16 of 2019.

The respondents counsel submitted that this application is brought under the Mental Treatment Act where a person in issue in this case Mr. Kiwanuka or the applicant alleges to be his father, will be defined as an idiot and to the extent that under Section 4 of that same Act for this court to adjudge a person of unsound mind it has to be satisfied not only that he has any mental impairment but also that he is a fit and proper person to be placed under care and treatment.

According to the respondents counsel, what Jordan Ssebuliba wants is Mr. Kiwanuka to be declared an idiot who should be placed in Butabika by the import of that section. To the extent what the law provides is unconstitutional, it is in consistent with the Constitution, it is no longer good law in Uganda to that extent it is contrary to Article 24 and 44(a) of the Constitution.

It was counsels contention that the nature of process that the applicant has evoked was intended for such persons that lie on the street without treatment and they need somebody to come and care for them. It should never be used to find a person in his peace doing his business and you subject them to forceful mental treatment. See Abiria Emmanuel versus Afema Richard High Court Miscellaneous Application No. 53 of 2007.

Secondly in the same case the judge said that a person living in a home under his peoples care, care of relatives should never be subjected to such an inquiry. In the present case Mr. Kiwanuka lives with his family at Plot 15 Prince Charles Drive with his wife and under the care of Maria Kiwanuka, the wife that means this court has no business inquiring.

There is no evidence adduced to even put court to an inquiry, the answer is no, evidence of unsoundness of mind. The affidavit of Kyamunkubya who the applicant names as his brother gives positive affirmations that have not been challenged, that Mr. Kiwanuka is sober, he is going on with his business, he is running his businesses and he has capacity to understand or manage his affairs.

The only evidence Mr. Sebuliba has put in his affidavit is that he reached a reasonable conclusion of unsoundness of mind based on continuous observation and interaction.

In reply to the alleged report from Dr Maniyar Farooq, counsel for the respondent submitted that the said doctor has disowned the said report/letter. The doctor says I have never undertaken any such medical procedure for purposes of testing the incapacity of Kiwanuka to manage his business or affairs, I have never done it.

To counsel since the doctor said he has never addressed any letters on the relatives that means or would imply such letters were somehow stolen from somewhere, that means they are not genuine and in any case, they dont have that effect that Sebuliba claims.

It would appear they were stolen from somewhere, because they were not addressed to any of the relatives that would have very big ethical issues and right to privacy. They would offend the United Kingdom ethical proceedings. The alleged doctor has disowned the letters, he has disowned the so called finding of the assessment that is the most important thing, he says I have never made such assessment.

In addition, the said letters clearly show there is nothing conclusive and he says I am going to carry out certain tests. Respondents counsel wondered why the applicant run to court to appoint doctors if Mr Kiwanuka has been seeing doctors for his own regular health check. The next letter talks about a score during an examination of 77% only two marks are lost for orientation, only three marks lost for recall. Therefore according to him there is no need for the court to order an examination.

Respondents counsel noted that the applicant and the family need to sit down and talk to Mr. Kiwanuka with Beatrice instead of instituting these hostile proceedings that would continue to impact on the entire family.

Determination

This court noted that the applicant did not follow the procedures set out to the letter under the Mental Treatment Act and the Administration of Estate of Persons of Unsound Mind Act. The Court in exercise of its discretion has proceeded to make an inquiry and come to its own conclusions or findings.

It is in the interest of justice that this court resolves the issue of insanity or soundness of mind that has far reaching implications and consequences against the person of Mr Kiwanuka.

Justice Eva K Luswata, In the Matter of Songolo Difasi Mugabo High Court Miscellanoeus Cause No. 16 of 2019 underscored the importance of such an inquiry or investigation.

The requirement for a proper investigation or inquiry should not be undermined. Nobody should, be adjudged or determined to be of unsound mind when no professional expert advice is available. This would be a serious affront to the personal integrity and would also open them up to fraudulent people, who may wish to take over their property.

Section 1 of the Mental Treatment Act defines a person of unsound mind to mean an idiot or a person who is suffering from mental derangement.

Blacks Law Dictionary Eight Edition defines an Insane to mean; Mentally deranged; suffering from one or more delusions or false beliefs that (1) have no foundation in reason or reality, (2) are not credible to any reasonable person of sound mind, and (3) cannot be overcome in a sufferers mind by any amount of evidence or argument.

In the case of Aseru Joyce Ajju vs Anjoyo Agnes HCMA 001 of 2016, Justice Mubiru noted that;

A person is deemed to be of unsound mind for purposes of these proceedings if he or she is afflicted by a total or partial defect of reason or perturbation thereof, to such degree that he or she is incapable of managing himself or herself or his or her affairs.

This is the standard suggested in Whysall v Whysall [1960] P.52 where Phillimore J, expressed the following opinion as to the degree of insanity which had to be found; if a practical test of the degree is required, I think it is to be found in the phrase..incapable of managing himself and his affairs..and that the test of ability to manage affairs is to be required of the reasonable man. The elderly gentleman who is no longer capable of dealing with the problems of a take-over bid is not, in my judgment, to be condemned on that account as of unsound mind.

The purpose of Mental State Examination is to obtain a comprehensive cross-sectional description of the patients mental state, which, when combined with biographical and historical information of the patients history, allows the clinician to make an accurate diagnosis and formulation which are required for the coherent treatment planning.

The mental state examination is a structured way of observing and describing a patients current state of the mind, under the domains of appearance, attitude, behaviour, mood, effect, speech, thought process, thought content, perception, cognition & sight and judgment.

According to the Principles for the protection of persons with mental illness and improvement of mental health care adopted by the General Assembly resolution 46/119 of 17th December 1991-Office of the High Commissioner for Human Rights .

Under Principle 4.

A determination that a person has a mental illness shall be made in accordance with internationally accepted medical standards.

A determination of mental illness shall never be made on the basis of political, economic or social status, or membership of a cultural, racial or religious group, or any other reason not directly relevant to the mental health status.

Family or professional conflict, or non-conformity with moral, social, cultural or political values or religious beliefs prevailing in a persons community, shall never be a determining factor in diagnosing mental illness.

A background of past treatment or hospitalisation as a patient shall not of itself justify any present or future determination of mental illness.

Principle 5

No person shall be compelled to undergo medical examination with a view to determining whether or not he or she has a mental illness except in accordance with a procedure authorized by domestic law.

According to the Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities, One of the core principles of the Convention is respect of individual autonomy including the freedom to make ones own choices, and independence of persons. The Committee on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities has interpreted the core requirement of article 12 to be the replacement of substituted decision-making regimes by supported decision making, which respects the persons autonomy, will and preferences.

The Special Rapporteur on the right of everyone to the enjoyment of the highest attainable standard of physical and mental health observed that informed consent is not mere acceptance of medical intervention, but voluntary and sufficiently informed decision. Guaranteeing informed consent is a fundamental feature of respecting an individuals autonomy, self-determination and human dignity in an appropriate continuum of voluntary health-care services.

There is an intimate link between forced medical interventions based on discrimination and the deprivation of legal capacity which as a result may result in torture or inhuman and degrading treatment. This results in deprivation of legal capacity, when a persons exercise of decision-making is taken away and given to others under the guise of mental health treatment and care.

The forced treatment or subjection of mental health suspect or patient to treatment or examination may amount to torture. A Special Rapporteur noted: Torture, as the most serious violation of the human right to personal integrity and dignity, presupposes a situation of powerlessness, whereby the victim is under the total control of another person. (See A/63/175, para. 50)

The medical treatment of an intrusive and irreversible nature, when lacking a therapeutic purpose, may constitute torture or ill-treatment when enforced or administered without the free and informed consent of the person concerned. This is especially true when the treatment or examination is performed on persons/patients with disabilities, notwithstanding claims of good intentions or medical necessity.

The discriminatory character of forced psychiatric interventions, when committed against persons with psychosocial disabilities, satisfies both intent and purpose required under the Article 1 of the Convention against Torture, notwithstanding claims of good intentions by medical professionals.

The court should be mindful of the international obligations under the different Conventions before arriving at its decision of whether or not to subject the applicant to a forced or involuntary mental examination and or treatment.

Justice Mubiru in the case of Aseru Joyce Ajju vs Anjoyo Agnes HCMA 001 of 2016 quoting the Indian case of Moohammad Yaqub v Nazir Ahmad & Others 1920 50 Ind Cas 617 as follows:-

When a person is alleged to be insane..there ought to be a careful and thorough preliminary enquiry and the Judge ought to satisfy that there is a real ground for an inquisition. It is impossible to lay down any hard and fast rule, but in the first place it is essential that the person making the application should support it ordinarily by an affidavit or by tendering himself for examination to the Judge on oath in support of the allegations in his application.

The Learned Judge would naturally want to know what relationship existed, what previous association had existed between the applicant and the alleged insane person, how long the illness was supposed to have lasted, why no previous steps had been taken and what were the present symptoms and actual causes which had induced the applicant to make the application as when he did.an application of this kind ought to be supported by some medical evidence in the nature of a certificate of some doctor, lady or otherwise, who has had a reasonable opportunity of seeing the condition of the alleged invalid.

If no medical evidence is forthcoming of more recent date eight years before applicationit would be very desirable that the Judge should seek some personal interview with the alleged insane, not with a view to forming a final opinion as to her real condition but to satisfy himself in the ordinary way, in which a layman can do, that there is real ground for supposing that there is something abnormal in her mental condition which might bring her within the Lunacy Act

The importance of such an inquiry was further underlined in Ranjit Kumar Ghose v Secretary, Indian Psychoanalytical Society AIR 1963 Calcutta 261, also cited in Aseru Joyce Ajju vs Anjayo Agnes where the court decided as follows;-

In many cases, and we think that this case is probably one, it would be very desirable that the Judge should seek some personal interview with the alleged insane, not with the view to forming a final opinion as to her real condition, but to satisfy himself in the ordinary way, in which a layman can do, that there is a real ground supposing that there is something abnormal in her mental condition which might bring her within the Lunacy Act.the enquiry which is contemplated..into the alleged infirmity is a judicial enquiry with notice to the alleged insane person and any order passed against an allegedly insane person without such inquiry will vitiate the order to the extent of making the same a nullity. The court should of its own motion conduct an enquiry in accordance with the provisions of that section before accepting the application. It was obligatory that the court conducted an enquiry as to whether the petitioner had become incapable due to any mental infirmity of protecting his interest..

In the present case the applicant is relying on two letters dated 18th May 2017 generated by Dr Farooq Maniyar-Consultant Neurologist & Honorary Senior Clinical Lecturer based in the United Kingdom and he noted as follows;

This gentlemans Addenbrookes cognitive evaluation score (ACE-R) was 77. One needs to point out that English is a second language and therefore some of the estimations may not have been accurate.

He lost 2 marks for orientation, 3 marks for recall, 7 marks for verbal fluency, 6 marks for language naming, 3 marks for language-comprehension, 1 mark for visual spatial ability.

He is himself only partially aware that he has some memory problem but he feels this may be normal ageing and he is aware of any significant issues with his cognition.

On examination, he had a slow effect. He spoke well although limited. His gait was normal with good pendular swing movements of his hands. Eye movements were normal. There were no cerebellar signs in his upper limbs or lower limbs. The deep tendon reflexes were normal bilaterally. There were no extra pyramidal signs including cogwheeling or bradykinesia.

Impression and Management: There seems to have been a change in this gentlemans cognition and I note the problems with the memory domain, visual spatial problems and personality change. A few things are possible including a frontotemporal aetiology or Alzheimers etiology.

In the first instance, I will arrange to meet up again with him for an Addenbrookes cognitive assessment which should also serve as a baseline.

I have asked for an MRI scan of the brain as well as bloods including VDRL, HIV, B12, folate, thyroid function tests, glucose, ANA,ANCA, liver function tests, urea and electrolytes and full blood count.

I will see him with the results

Kind regards,

Dr F Maniyar

The applicant states in his affidavit in support that; There is reasonable belief, which belief is based on close and continuous observations and interactions with the respondent, together with a reasonable assessment of a doctor in form of a medical assessment report issued to the respondent and his wife in May 2017 that provided clear evidence of extensive progressive cognitive impairment and conclusive proof that the respondent is suffering from the debilitating brain degenerative dementia condition otherwise known as Alzheimers disease which mental ailment has taken firm root and manifested itself in a noticeable decline of the respondents memory, thinking, character and reasoning skills.

The applicants belief is not supported by any cogent medical evidence since the Doctor who examined the respondent on the information available never concluded on anything.

This court agrees with the respondents counsel that there was nothing conclusive in the said two letters and the doctor noted at the bottom I will see him with the results

In absence of any new information or report made after the results are handed to the doctor it would be highly speculative of this court to rely on such evidence/report which was inconclusive.

Secondly a medical report or notes obtained in unclear circumstances should never be the basis of instituting mental examination proceedings. Since this may raise other issues surrounding the right to privacy and also reliance on improperly or illegally procured evidence in a court of law.

The conclusions or basis upon, which the applicant is bringing this application falls short for a simple reason, the respondent is equally mindful of his health and that is why he went to see the doctor during his routine check-ups. Alzheimer/dementia is a loss of brain cells and the diagnosis of it is a process and not a one off examination.

There must be a record of history from persons who have lived with the patient for at least 3 years and then an oral examination of the patient before carrying out a mini mental examination focussed on whether, of all possible physiological conditions, dementia was one. There are many other physical conditions that are not diseases of the mind but outwardly mimic dementia. A full examination of the nerves and a review of the kind of medication the patient was taking are also necessary.

The court forced examination of the respondent could indeed be an infringement on his right against torture or inhuman and degrading treatment/ill treatment under the Constitution and under article 1 of the Convention against Torture. The involuntary treatment and other psychiatric interventions are forms of torture and ill-treatment.

It is equally defamatory for a respondent who is performing his duties and running his businesses to be dragged to court for forceful examination in order to determine his mental state in the absence of the conclusive medical evidence or glaring proof of insanity that would lead the person being harmful to himself or people around him or her.

The applicant has stated in his affidavit that the present application is brought for the benefit of the respondent, his immediate family and business in general in order to protect the respondent and his various businesses and family from the growing ravages of dementia and from opportunistic third parties intention of taking advantage of the respondents impaired and failing mental capacity.

According to the applicant, the respondent has lost his business acumen brought on by a severely deteriorated memory and inability to recognise the severity of the deterioration, which has resulted in disastrous management, operation and decision making at his numerous companies which poor operation has resulted in the respondents withdrawal not just from his family but from business and social life.

It would be absurd if this court would allow any businessman who loses his business acumen to be subjected to mental examination. Making or taking wrong business decisions in a business is not insanity or a person should not be condemned on that account as a person of unsound mind.

The applicant decided to bring this application for mental examination after the respondent had removed him from the position of Company Secretary and also appointed Mrs Maria Kiwanuka as a new Director. This means or would imply that if the applicant had not been removed from the said position in May 2019 by the respondent then the respondent was still of sound mind and everything remained normal and fine with him.

The respondent did not file any affidavit in reply, but rather his son, lawyer, finance director and friend deposed affidavits in opposition to the application and they all confirmed that he is of sound mind.

The court summoned the respondent to appear before it in order to carry out any enquiry envisaged under the Mental Treatment Act. The court interviewed the respondent for over 30 minutes in presence of the lawyers and thereafter for about 15 minutes without the lawyers.

From the interview, the court did not find any noticeable mental problem with the respondent. He spoke calmly especially about the dispute between himself and the applicant and at times he would make some little jokes.

It is my settled opinion that the respondent is still in charge of his mental faculties and his only problem with the applicant according to him is that he wants to take over or grab his property which he has worked hard to earn over the years.

Go here to read the rest:
Kiwanuka case: Why judge refused mental examination - The Observer

Sex education was that awkward class in high school for many of us, mostly received with awkward giggles, let-this-class-be-done-with-already glances and a sense ofdiscomfort experienced by teachers and students alike. Sex education in schools, if its present at all, suffers from the consequences of the taboo around the topic of sex in society. With teachers not equipped enough to teach sex ed and burdened with vast syllabi, sex education has largely been a topic thats either quickly glossed over, with no room for any discussion, or just skipped entirely. This leaves much of sex education to organically happen within peer groups or through casual internet browsing.

Sex education classes were (and still are) rather selective in terms of the information they choose to convey.For example, ten years ago, my humble convent school skipped the topic of sex entirely and went right from explaining the menstrual cycle to explaining the period post-conception, with no information about what happens in the middle. It came as no surprise when many anecdotes about sex education classes from peers highlighted how sex education was largely a directive or a speech about abstinence, seeking to induce fear of STIs, laced with heteronormative, moral ideas regarding sexual intercourse within monogamous, heterosexual, marital relationships. They also largely put the responsibility to steer clear from unwanted pregnancies on the woman.

But, sex education is more than that it not only encompasses the biology of sex, and STDs, but is also about providinga space for conversation about interpersonal relationships, learning how to set and express boundaries, and understanding gender and sexuality and its relation to mental health and well-being. With access to technology and larger school curricular reforms, educationists are beginning to envision learning outcomes beyond academic ones, thus equipping learners with critical thinking, the ability to communicateand develop social and emotional competencies that can be applied both within the schools and in society outside.

Related on The Swaddle:

Transgender Kids Brains Reflect Their Gender Identity in Structure and Function

Just like any subject, making sex education relatable requires educators to implement developmentally appropriate curricula, build on their learners prior knowledge, allow for engagement in the learning process, and create a safe space to facilitate and normalize conversations. Reshma Valliappan, founder of The Red Door Foundation, India an organization that works with Municipal schools in Pune believes that creating this safe space to discuss sex, sexuality and health in her classrooms comes with recognizing the stigma and discomfort, and even allowing students to shut their ears, and being open to letting students talk after class hours, as school classrooms can often lack a sense of anonymity. She also points out that understanding (cultural) context is key in student engagement, especially in her work in schools with high rates of violence, drug abuse and bullying.

For Valliappan, sex education is only a vantage point from which to create a space where students find a space to voice their understanding of their ever-changing world, learn how to be empathetic and respectful to people in general not just to the opposite sex. Humorously adding that she is often asked the question Ladki ko kaise pataneka? (How to woo a girl?) by her students, Valliappan asserts that the importance of consent, accepting rejection and establishing boundaries is what students need to see in the light of non-sexual/non- romanticrelationships as well.

Even experimenting with different mediums can make an otherwise awkward subject easy to teach, and easy to consume or learn, such as art. Art is a very comfortable space (that) gets you to start thinking of things in a very real context says Chaitanya Modak, a graphic novelist who facilitated a series of graphic novel workshops titled Comics Epidemic for The Dharavi Biennale organized by SNEHA, an organization that works on issues of maternal and child health in Mumbai with a group of youth aged 14-24 in Dharavi. Not only did these workshops provide a communal space for sexual health information, they also helped the youth create complex narratives from their own lives using comics as a medium. Examples of the comics included a talk show on different views regarding masturbation, and a narrative of a young boy adjusting in a society that doesnt consider him macho enough.These conversations that were part of the workshop show how sex education is moving towards a pleasure-driven discourse that is significant in addressing the silence around sex and sexuality.

Aakriti Pasricha, whose research on womens experiences of pleasure sounds these beliefs when talking about how good touch/bad touch has conveniently kept aside any conversation about pleasure, and especially the pleasure of women. A focus on conversations around menstruation and pregnancy during sex education has also been coupled with little to no information about female reproductive anatomy(more than just the uterus). According to Pasricha, this has not only led to confused notions about the difference between the urethra and vagina, but given little space for women to understand their own bodies or even explore it. Moreover, these misconceptions show that the implementation of sex education curricula has been from an expert-driven (medical) perspective, which focuses only on biology, lacking any sort of experiential knowledge or female narrative. A pleasure-driven discourse in sex education is also crucial in breaking myths formed by Bollywoods romanticized portrayal of sex that is devoid of consent-taking or any kind of negotiation during intercourse.

While conventional sex education focuses on ones relationship with another human being, its interesting to see how a pleasure-driven discourse can help individuals explore and better understand themselves, as well as question and reflect on societal ideals that are otherwise left unquestioned in school.

Nihal Anabel, and his colleagues atthe socio-emotional department of Muktangan Education Trust (Mumbai) an organization that mentors seven municipal schools in Mumbai help students see gender as a social construct and as being way beyond its binary understanding of male versus female. Queering sex education is a step toward a more inclusive sexuality education that recognizes the extent to which conventional sex-education has been propagating a heteronormative narrative, exclusive of LGBTQIA+ lives and experiences. The LGBTIA+ community has not only been victim to inaccessible health and sexual health care but also faces unique stressors on account of societal stigma. Creating a sex education discourse through a queer lens is crucial in fostering a society where all kinds of bodies and sexualities are made to feel safe and accepted, especially within a formative learning space such as the classroom. Anabel and his interns from TISS, Mumbai used the GenderBread Person Model todiscuss how gender identity, expression, attraction and biological sex all lie on a spectrum and arent necessarily connected to each other. While it was a challenge introducing these words to the students, it wasnt something that students were completely unaware of. According to Anabel, this was more a reason to begin conversations on gender in younger grades so that more nuanced discussions on language and gender visibility can be made possible in higher grades.

Related on The Swaddle:

An Increasing Number of Women Are Buying Sex Toys, Thanks to the Internet

There still exist challenges in dealingwith an overload of information, often misleading or false, on the internet, creating the need for an incremental curriculum, coming up with new pedagogical strategies and keeping in mind different learner level (yes, not every child grows or comprehends things at the same pace). However, these means of engagement show that weve come miles from sex education being an abstinence-only discourse, and in incorporating a well-being perspective, beyond just an illness lens. These discussions helpfurther a human rights discourse to sex and sexuality education that imbibes the right to live with dignity for all,and a sense of equality, justice and a non-discriminatory attitude towards both, oneself as well as others.

More here:
Sex Education Should Encompass Biology, Sexuality and Mental Health - The Swaddle

Americans are victimized by episodes of mass gun violence and active shooter events with increasing regularity. The news coverage after each event commonly portrays a perpetrator whose behavior, although negative, was not sufficiently explicit that others could have predicted his violent conduct. Regrettably, this attitude ignores the relevance of numerous validated risk factors for identifying and stratifying individual risk of violence and dismisses opportunities for prevention. (Mother Jones, Oct. 15, 2014, http://bit.ly/2Hn5qBI; Federal Bureau of Investigation. Sept. 16, 2013, http://bit.ly/2Pb9awm; U.S. Department of Homeland Security. April 2019, http://bit.ly/2ZoPNzZ.)

It is certainly impossible to predict future violence from specific individuals, and the majority of individuals with negative behaviors and access to firearms never complete acts of interpersonal violence. We emergency physicians, however, recognize that the confluence of negative risk factors and firearm access often leads to poor outcomes, and we treat the consequences of this unfavorable association every day in emergency departments.

Firearms augment the risk of injury and death from self-directed or interpersonal violence, and may also have a causal role in inciting violent conduct. (JAMA Pediatr. 2013;167[12]:1094.) Emergency physicians commonly care for individuals who demonstrate risk factors for violence, such as previous violent conduct, intoxication, agitation, and impaired impulse control, among many others. If we discover that these same patients also have access to firearms, it may cause us to change our perception of risk and influence our treatment plan and disposition.

An intoxicated patient delivered to the ED by law enforcement for a welfare check following a bar fight, for example, generally presents a threat only to himself. When the same patient stumbles onto the gurney and drops a handgun from his coat pocket, he poses a threat to everyone, including himself. The same may be true for an agitated patient who expresses menacing sentiments against individuals or groups but does not specify a plan or a target. Would firearm access by this individual constitute a public safety threat, and what can clinicians do to mitigate the risk of harm?

Numerous cases in the public domain demonstrate that such individuals cause concern for safety among laypersons and law enforcement, and these individuals are then transported to EDs for mental health evaluations. (Bennington Banner. Jan. 3, 2013, http://bit.ly/2ZokgSL; Jan. 30, 2013, http://bit.ly/2L1sCXc; and Nov. 5, 2014, http://bit.ly/2NtTrWM; and VTDigger. Dec. 18, 2018; http://bit.ly/2NolJ5b.)

The incidence of these cases is unknown, and certainly many more may not be reported due to confidentiality concerns. Emergency physicians in these situations are explicitly challenged with the responsibility of determining how such behaviors with a firearm contribute to clinical status and whether firearm access paired with negative behaviors indicate an unstable mental or physical condition in need of treatment.

We emergency physicians require clarity about our role and accountability in these circumstances. We have legal, ethical, and professional obligations to protect individual and public safety when we are concerned that a patient under our care may pose a threat to himself or others. HIPAA permits disclosure of protected health information without consent when providers believe that such disclosure is necessary to prevent or lessen a serious and imminent threat to the health or safety of a person or the public. (Health & Human Services Regulations, 164.512 [j][i][A]. 5 Jan 2001; http://bit.ly/2TZ0gkD.) In situations where patients do not explicitly endorse an intention to harm themselves or others, clinical concerns about serious and potential bodily harm may fall below the reporting thresholds permitted by HIPAA, which precipitates a dilemma between safety and compliance.

No professional guidelines exist for evaluating firearm access among acute care patients despite the fact that access possibly contributes to the clinical estimation of risk. There are also no guidelines to advise us how to diminish the risk of firearm violence when present. The treating physician must weigh the dynamics of risk v. protective factors that can influence individuals toward or away from violence even though that is not a common component of emergency medicine training.

Understanding risk factors for firearm injury and interpreting them in clinical practice will require a systematic, multidisciplinary effort based in science. As long as the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the National Institutes of Health persist in not funding firearm injury prevention research, the American Foundation for Firearm Injury Reduction in Medicine (AFFIRM) will try to fill the void.

AFFIRM was founded in October 2017 to reduce the incidence and health consequences of firearm victimization, injury, and death through research, evidence-based practice, and community partnerships. AFFIRM is the hub of a growing network of more than 20 of the nation's leading physician, nurse, and public health organizations, including the American College of Emergency Physicians, the American Academy of Emergency Medicine, and the Emergency Nurses Association.

We as health care providers must address the epidemic of firearm violence in the same manner that we address other public health concerns. By investing in science and putting the house of medicine to work, we can create evidence-based strategies to understand which behaviors and cognitions about firearms are unsafe and how a patient's access to firearms should inform our work to identify, stratify, and treat patients at risk of self-directed and interpersonal firearm violence. It is up to us to create the change we all need to see.

Dr. Barsottiis the founding chief executive officer of the American Foundation for Firearm Injury Reduction in Medicine (AFFIRM) and an emergency physician at Berkshire Medical Center in Pittsfield, MA. He is also the immediate past chair of the trauma and injury prevention section of the American College of Emergency Physicians, and a member of the Massachusetts Medical Society committees on preparedness and violence intervention and prevention. Follow AFFIRM on Twitter @ResearchAffirm. Find more information about AFFIRM athttps://affirmresearch.org.

AFFIRM and the Coalition on Psychiatric Emergencies are holding a pre-course on gun violence and threat assessments in the ED at the ACEP Scientific Assembly this month. Care Under Fire will be held Sat., Oct. 26, 1-5 pm, at the Colorado Convention Center. Registration is $99 at http://bit.ly/CareUnderFire.

Emergency Medicine News41(10):14, October 2019.

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Standing AFFIRM: Putting the House of Medicine to Work:... : Emergency Medicine News - LWW Journals

A Girl with Aspergers has been crowned a princess for her top mental health tips after helping her mum through cancer.

Angelina Peoples, 10, was named Mental Health Princess at the Miss Shining Light pageant after sharing her advice in a video.

Her mum Natalie Dickson, who has battled breast cancer, has told of her pride at the brave little girl.

I started crying, said the Co Antrim woman.

She did it to raise awareness for Me 4 Mental - a charity for mental health. I think they raised over 11,000.

The video round was the last one and I just broke into tears for her.

I was delighted for people to understand that she hasnt had it easy and there are kids out there that have no choice but to care for their parents and have their own wee battles.

With me having breast cancer Angelina had been to quite a few groups through Laurel House in Antrim, explained the Larne woman.

It was a course of six weeks, mainly for kids to understand cancer doesnt mean death or the end of the world.

It tries to break it into a simple form for a child that staying positive is the best thing for anything in life.

Over the past year, so much has happened and she has had no choice but to grow up and try to be more mature.

The video to me has a lot of things Angelina wrote herself - things she had learned along the way in different counselling sessions and therapies.

A couple of wee things she has maybe put her own twist on it, she added.

I was really pleased that she got the appreciation for it. She won the title for Miss Mental Health princess 2019.

Natalie said her daughter started doing pageants in 2016 because she really enjoyed them and was diagnosed with Aspergers - an autism spectrum disorder the following year.

Her diagnosis was in June 2017, she added.

She has always been very well spoken and quite intelligent for her age (but) her anxiety levels are through the roof - especially since Ive been sick, with fears of me leaving her or that shell never see me again.

Natalies breast cancer diagnosis in February 2017 - just a month before her daughters eighth birthday - heaped extra pressure on the family.

You just go into survival mode, she continued.

There are a lot of people who dont survive cancer but I have always had a (positive) attitude and would be a bit sarcastic.

I would look for the silver lining and think, maybe Ill lose a wee bit of weight with this chemo.

I was always someone who tried to be strong and at the same time think, theres always worse in the world.

And Natalie said her daughter was a great help through it all.

Whenever I was having treatment, Angelinas younger brother (Craig, six) has autism so he was still in nappies and stuff, she added.

She would do wee things like that, empty the dishwasher, tidied up, changed nappies, bathed her brother because I was lying really ill. She never complained.

I felt that six months of chemo took that childhood away from her, so gradually I have tried to bring it back.

I want her to be a child again and I took them to Disneyland at the end of my treatment.

She carried the worries of the world on her shoulders.

1. Always stay positive

2. Learn from difficult times - they do not last forever

3. Be grateful - gratitude means showing appreciation

4. Focus on what you can control and not what you can't

5. Give yourself credit for what you have done

6. Be kind to yourself

7. Never compare yourself to others

8. Be your own hero

If you feel that you need support, please contact the Samaritans on 116 123 or Lifeline on 0808 808 8000 .

Keep up-to-date with all the very latest news, what's on, sport and everything else in Belfast and beyond with the Belfast Live app.

Only select news that interests you by picking the topics you want to display on the app's homepage. Plus, our enhanced user experience includes live blogs, video, interactive maps and slick picture galleries. Download it now and get involved .

Click here to get it from the App Store or here for Google Play .

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Watch: 'Mental Health Princess' with Aspergers shares top tips for healthy mind - Belfast Live

SHARNAE HOPE/STUFF

Shining Light on the Dark Matamata-Piako organisers Amber McGrail and Briarley Stephens.

Phrases like "harden up" and "take a concrete pill" aren't welcomeat amental health awareness event next month.

Matamata localAmberMcGrail, with the help ofBriarley Stephens, Melissa Martin and Kat Ross haveestablished an non-for-profit organisation in Matamata-Piakoto support rural folk "trudging through the mud" of anxiety, depression andsuicide.

Shining Light on the Dark originally started on the West Coast after the suicideof a Hokitikarugby club member in 2017. The initiative has since branched out to South Waikato and now Matamata-Piako.

"I attended theSouth Waikato event last year in memory of mybest friend who committedsuicidealmost 11 years ago, and instantly felt inspired to create something similar," McGrail said.

READ MORE:* Government sets up Suicide Prevention Office as part of national strategy* Edge radio hosts in tears, share heartfelt message after friend's suspected suicide* Why 'harden up' is no help those with depression

"It's a real different grief [losing someone to suicide]it affected me and it still does. I think about all the things he's missed out on."

On top of the death of her best friend, McGrail, a mother of three,has also suffered from severe anxiety after experiencing a stillbirth when she was 21 andseveral miscarriages.

"When it [anxiety] starts coming you often don't know what it is, when I first started gettinganxiety I was like what the hell is this. I thought I was a looney!

"It wasn't until someone told me...whenthey said that's anxiety, it all started to piece together."

SHARNAE HOPE/STUFF

Amber McGrail and Briarley Stephens have both lost loved ones to suicide.

Stephens said support is also more important than ever in the rural community with more farmers struggling with mental health.

"Ruralsuicideand mental health is quite massive. There's the attitude of harden up and take a concrete pill, with men especially, but it's not that easy," Stephens said.

"Around 680 people inNew Zealand lost their lives to suicide in the last year.

"We don't know how many of those are in the district, but we know ourselves quite a few people who have lost their lives to suicide and we felt like now was the time for us to help the community out."

Shining Light on the Dark gumboot fun run will be on November 1 at 5.30pm at Bedford Park in Matamata.

There will be an obstacle course to weave around and the first lap will be a non-silence lap- where everyone canmake as much noise as they want.

There will also be food stalls, performancesand the event will be hosted bycomedianTom Sainsbury.

"We will also have service providers coming around to talk to people about mental health and maybe give people tips on where they can go from there for support," Stephens said.

"Any money we raise will go towards this event, we're not doing it as a fundraiser.But any surplusmoney we are hoping to inject into the community hopefully by way of a support group."

For more go toshininglightmatamatapiako.co.nz

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Shining a light on depression and suicide in Waikato's rural community - Stuff.co.nz

Thriving when you don't love your work

You know that to grow your career, you must perform with gusto in your current role. That can be tough, however, if it doesnt seem like a great fit or if it doesnt inspire you. Sometimes the path to your next opportunity can be a bit rocky or a bit bland.

Either way, a reset may be necessary. Heres how to not only bide your time until your next role, but to thrive as you strive toward the next career step:

Make Friends

Find people at work you can build a relationship with and whom you appreciate. If your job is total drudgery, the people slogging through next to you can be the most important part of your survival. Misery likes company, yesbut even morepeople can help pick you up when youre down.

Focus On The Positive

If youre not loving what you do, focus on small, positive elements. Perhaps the commute is easy or the hours are good. If you dont like the content of your work, maybe at least the company has a constructive culture. Being grateful for (even) small things will do worlds for your attitude and your survival until the next opportunity presents itself.

Focus On Whats Next

While todays work may not be all you hoped it would be, youre always on a path toward whats next. Intentionally set your vision on your next role. Imagine what you will do, how youll build your skills, and the ways youll reach out to gain support from mentors. The clearer you are about whats next, the more you can make positive effort toward that next step.

Push Your Patience Button

When his son whines for what he wants, we have a friend who tells him, Push your patience button. This is good advice for adults too. Not every job will be roses and butterflies, so be patient with where you are. All careers need to grow over time and time can be the operative word. All careers also go through ups and downs. So, whether youre developing toward the next step or in a rut in your career journey, be patient. Know things will changeoften faster than you think.

Learn What Not To Do

We tend to think the best learning is through positive experiences. But, in actuality, some of the deepest learning comes from tough situations. If your boss is a tyrant, focus on what you can learn about your own future approach to leadershipwhat youll do differently. If your company doesnt value people or foster a positive culture, focus on what you can learn about what to look for in the best companies. Youll have a list of criteria at-the-ready when youre seeking your next role. Learning through negative experiences can be as powerful as learning through positive ones.

Get All You can From The Company

Perhaps you dont love your job, but the company offers great benefits. Now may be the time to get that elective surgery or complete your degree using the companys tuition reimbursement program. Youre contributing through your good work, so its fair for you to leverage all the company has to offer in the meantime.

Focus Your Extra Energy

If your job isnt stimulating, take advantage of the brain capacity your role doesnt require. Mentally develop that novel youve been wanting to write or envision the ideal house youll design and build. Our mental functions can be as stimulating as those in the physical world, so embrace the cognitive opportunities.

Overall, know that a not-so-great job wont last. The leader will change. The company will evolve. And the content of the work will certainly develop. Hang in there and your positive approach over time will certainly pay off in your next great opportunity.

Follow this link:
How To Thrive In A Job You Dont Love: 7 Strategies - Forbes

Its a glorious late summer day in Greenpoint, Brooklyn. Vinnie Caruana is sitting outside a bar just a few blocks from where he singer lives with his wife, Laura. Theyre going on honeymoon in two daysthe sun is shining and the beer is flowing, and The Movielife and I Am The Avalanche singer is talking about death. A lot. But then, deathand mortality in generalhas been on his mind a lotrecently.

Not that hes letting it slow him down at all. In a week or so, Constant Elevationthe hardcore band formed by Vinnie and scene (and former Movielife) drummer Sammy Sieglerwill play their first ever gig. A week or so after that, Vinnie will see in his 40th birthday (a milestone for anybody, but especially a punk musician) with a solo show in Brooklyn. Its all evidence that the title of his new solo EP, Aging Frontman, is more of a joke than a fact, despite the somber nature of its songs and the contemplative, mortality-obsessed mood Vinnie is intoday.

Six tracks long, Aging Frontman is, to some extent, the culmination of the two decades Vinnie has spent playing in bands, something that started after his older brothers introduced him to the Long Island hardcore scene when he was a teenager. It begins with the brooding Better, a slow, savagely melancholy lament that drips with the kind of regret only felt by someone who feels that the good old days are long gone. Yet at the same time, theres a hope there, too: that we can always make more good old days, that no matter how tough things canget.

Thats an attitude shared by the EPs five other songs anddespite admissions about a downturn in his mental health and his preoccupation with mortalityalso by Vinnie himself in conversation. For though he will later admit that this is the most depressing interview hes ever done, his defiance, his happiness, and his love for his wife undeniably shinethrough.

Obviously the title of your new EP is slightly tongue-in-cheek, but are there some deep-rooted fears there, too?

Vinnie Caruana: Yeah. Its not like Im being melodramatic about turning 40, but it is a milestone, especially for all the guys like me that arent rock stars that dont have to worry about anything and have their big houses and thousands of people coming to see them. Ive always had a modestly-sized fanbase but loyal and amazing and I see people getting older and fanbases getting older and having kids. We sold a lot of onesies on the last tour! Its not like I see an end to my career or anything, but everyone whos in my position and depends on music to make a living, they have their doubts. And I still have them all thetime.

So thats part of it: Im getting older and Im going to have to do something else. Im not going to be 55 years old expecting everyone to want to come and see me play still. Not that Im going to stop playing musicbut what am I going to do along with playing music thats not bartending? Because every time I went back to bartending, my creativity would cease, because in New York bars close at 4am and after you get done counting the money and cleaning, you get home at six in the morning and you sleep all day. If its the winter, you dont see daylight. When am I writing music during that time? So thats part ofit.

The other part of it isand I get complimented on it all the timeYou dont look like youre turning 40. Youre in good shape! And the answer is always that its the inside thats falling apart. There are tons of trouble areas with bones and tendons and joints going wrong, and I feel it. Im in pain. All that stuff I was dealing with when I was doing the City By The Sea record, and all the stuff I wrote about on Wolverines is still there. I have chronic pain that only gets worse and it spreads. Theres new chronic pain! And then theres the part thats still tongue-in-cheek where I have friends of mine who are 50 and still sing in bands and stuff and I sent them my record and theyre like Ah, fuck you! Youre young! And Iknow.

Its not like this serious thing of Oh no, Im getting older! but more that I think its funny. I think Aging Frontman is the best title Ive ever come up with for anything. The lyrics are really heavy sometimes depressing, and all the time very serious and I thought it would be nice to have a juxtaposition between that and the title and the cover of the record.

But you turning 40 had nothing to do with the more mellow sound of this record? Its just what felt right for this project?

Right. Im in enough rock bands. I dont want to be a rock band on my solo stuff. Even Survivors Guilt was kind of a full band-sounding album, because artistically, thats just what I wanted to do. This is a look at what other shit Im into. Movielife is considered a pop-punk band by some people, some people call it a post-hardcore band. I certainly dont listen to pop-punk and Movielife wrote a lot of that stuff when we were really young when maybe I was listening to some stuff like that. But this is more of a glimpse into who I am now. I want to be able to tour by myself with a guitar and I want to be able to play songs that make sense in thatsetting.

Would you say your solo stuff is more purelyyou?

Generally speaking, yes. 110%. I wrote an entire record that was more in this folky sort of realmbecause this was going to be a full-length and I changed my mind. I scrapped about 10 songs, poached a few good parts from some of them and I wrote Better. And many songs on this EP are my favorite songs that Ive done. Better is probably my favorite song that Ive ever done and it was written in like, 10 minutes, and theres only a handful of songs in my career that Ive written that quickly. Jamestown was one of those songs,too.

But I wrote Better, and the whole view of the landscape for my record changed; I began writing the record from that fork in the road. So to answer your question, it is all me, but Alone is a song I wrote with another songwriter and producer, Alex Fitz. I also work in publishing, and [Alex and I] got together to write because we like to create music for no reason and then figure out where its supposed to go. Sometimes it goes to a car commercial, sometimes itll go to another artist for their record. This song was always something that I really loved, and when Better opened my eyes to what the record could be, I had to revisit it and we brought it to a place where it made sense on my solorecord.

How has your approach to writing songs changed over theyears?

A lot of the early Movielife stuff, I wrote the lyrics on trains which is why I sing about trains so much. I didnt mean to, but I would always be on the train. I was working in the city, living on Long Island, and dating a girl in the city, so I would bring cassette tapes because wed tape the songs at practice and then I would write to it. I still sometimes do it, but I dont feel inspired during the day at all. I very, very seldomly write lyrics during the day. Although when I write lyrics for publishing, the sessions are in daytime, but Im not writing for myself then. I dont have any of myhang-ups.

The press release for this EP states quite emphatically that a big part of this solo EP is tackling the issue of your mental health to make sure that people know that youre okay, but also to make them know that its okay for them to not be okay. Did these songs offer the same kind of therapy that songwriting has always provided for you, or is there adifference?

Theres a difference. Its been a few years, and things have gotten more bleak since the last time I wrote a record. I dont want to write a bleak recordI like to think that theres hope in all of the despair that you find in my tunesbut this one felt different. I have a friend in Ireland who asked me to do an interview for his podcast relating to addiction and mental illness. We check in with our friends and make sure everyones good. And over the last few years has been the first time where Ive thought What is fucking going on? Why am I feeling this way? Because my answer was always that I dont have those problems. And then in the past few years Ive been like Oh, here it is heres what everyone has been dealing with. Not that I havent had anxiety issues and things like that, but this is a different feeling, where I know what that term mental illness means now. You feel mentally and physically sick from it. And thats something thats crept into my realm and something Im very happy Im aware of and that my receptors are open to that and recognizing it before its too late and thingsunravel.

So this is a new feeling completely and these are the first lyrics Ive written for myself with this new friend in tow. Ive never been shy of sharing everything with the listener theres just a passenger now who is part of me and who hangs out and I need to make sure that passenger is fed lots of healthy fruits andvegetables!

Do you know why that passenger has decided to joinyou?

Maybe reaching this point in my life. Theres new sets of problems and worries and new responsibilities, a new world that we live in, mortality, losing people. Every time you lose someone close to you it becomes this mark on your heart. And that keeps happening. I didnt really experience real loss until I was an adult, which is a blessing, but its also a curse because it all started happening a lot. Even with younger bands that weve played with on the road, people who arent my best buds but it affects me. I remember breaking down when Caleb [Scofield] from Cave In passed away, and I didnt even know him. I just feel like were in the same weird boat. And I cant even tell you how many times Ive read about and watched the whole thing unfold with [Scott Hutchison] of Frightened Rabbit. I didnt know him either, but I felt somehow connected to it because were all soldiers in this thing. Its really heartbreaking to me.

That seems to one of the unavoidable truths in life that the older you get, the more people youlose.

Right. And I watch my parents, who are in their 70s, and we speak about this stuff. My parents are very aware that theyre getting up there and that their friends are dying. And I see them living, like Damn the torpedoes lets go to fucking Sweden! Thats my parents vibe and I fucking love it because it makes me so hopeful that Im going to live and I fucking have to make sure that I live. Its very inspiring watching my parents do the thing, and any time Im like Oh, my back, my foot, my knee all these new things Im feeling mentally and physically I look at them and I go, Youre good. Youre 40,man!

Man, this is most depressinginterview!

But thats kind of the point. Because, in the context of Aging Frontman, you presumably never imagined having to deal with this stuff when you started The Movielife. And yet here you are now, having to deal with all this extrabaggage.

Right. The things Im writing about now arent things that just pop into my head. Im really considering itall.

But at the same time, you said Better is your favorite thing youve ever written. So would you trade any of thatin?

Absolutely not. And as much as its difficult, and therell be more. Thats what lifes going to be theres going to be extreme moments of bliss, theres going to be boring mediocrity and theres going to be extreme moments of devastation. And we dont know when theyre coming. But it feels awfully good to sing about it and helps me to feel kind of leveled out mentally. And boy, does it feel good to sing these in front of a crowd of people that I know feel what Im talking about. Im lucky that I get to do that. I dont know where Id be without being able to have that release and that outlet to write about it and then perform it. It keeps me happy. And thats the thing: You could hear the record and be like Fuck, man but another reason Im happyand Im not always happy, theres darknessis that Im able to do my thing and enjoylife.

And theres nothing like the fear of death to make you want to make the most of your own life. But at the same time, its also easy to forget to do that because real life always takes over again. Do you want this record to act as that kind of catalyst forpeople?

I feel like it always turns out that way. Because when we all connect and I come back to their town, wherever it is in the world, and Im singing these songs, people will sing along and theyre never sad. Theyre singing it and theyre smiling because its doing what its supposed to do. Its supposed to make you feel good. Like, Im a big David Bazan fan, and I feel amazing from his sad songs. Theyre not meant to make you feel sad. Theyre meant to be like Hey man, Im here, too! Lets fucking get through this shit. Could you imagine if it was just sad songs that made you feel more sad? Sad songs are so inspiring tome.

Bringing this back around to your career, do you think you would have ended up here now had The Movielife not encountered all that trouble with Drive-ThruRecords?

No. If The Movielife had kept on playing in the early days and we didnt break up in 2003, then no, I wouldnt have become the songwriter that I am right now. Because I wasnt really writing songs. I was more the singer and I was contributing way more by just writing vocals over songs. Id be there for arrangements and stuff, but Id let Brandon [Reilly] do all that stuff. So I wouldnt have grown into the songwriter I am right now if The Movielife had kept going in 2003. So anybodys whos mad that we broke up in 2003 and who has listened to Better and loves it I would never have written that song if I would have stayed in that comfort zone and kept writing lyrics over Movielifesongs.

So presumably you wouldnt change how any of that wentdown?

I wouldnt have changed anything. If The Movielife didnt break up and things didnt fall apart, then I wouldnt have moved to where I moved and met my first wife and then have that fall apart and learn a lot and become a better person and start I Am The Avalanche, who are some of my best friends. None of them were my best friends when we started. It was just a bunch of people that I brought together to see if we could be a band. And you can go down a real wormhole with those chain reactions, but I think that all the hard times and all the great times and everything in between has brought me to where I am right now. Where am I? Im married to the love of my life writing the best music of my life. Somehow still making music and people are still coming out to see me sing. Im just grateful that some of the songs Ive been writing mean something to some people still. And I wouldnt be writing any of them if I didnt go through all of this. We all have these journeys that build us into the person that we arelets hope that most of the time its for thebetter.

As you say, youre married to the love of your life and youre about to go on your honeymoon in two days. So how do you reconcile the disparity between the life youre living with your wife, and the melancholy of yoursongs?

When Im with Laura, Im never unhappy, because Im in the moment with her and our life together. Were not always just floating on a cloud were living the same life that everyone else is living and were trying to get by and be happy. But the moment Im aloneyou know, those days where you order a sandwich in a deli or something and your voice cracks because you realize you havent said anything all day, when every single word thats spoken is to yourself in your headis where itswitches.

So whatsnext?

I think The Movielife has done a lot since we reformed and we should mellow out a little bit. So Vinnie solo stuff is going to be the move, and some Avalanche fun could be something that happens in 2020. Thats something that means a lot to me and I want to make sure it stays alive. But I really want to write and release a summer record. My entire life, Ive never released a record in the summer, and Id really like to dothat.

Posted on October 1st 2019, 6:00pm

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Vinnie Caruana Gives The Most Depressing Interview of His Career - Kerrang!

Listen to their stories. For biopharma companies aiming to connect with patients and caregivers, therein lies the secret to meaningful engagement.

This was the takeaway from a special live episode of thecompanys Living With podcast, inwhich Health Unions community strategist and storyteller Emily Downward andCOO Lauren Lawhon, together with Alisha Bridges, a psoriasis patient advocateand one of Health Unions 300-plus contributors, discussed how important it isfor pharma marketers to understand what its like to live with a chroniccondition.

Downward, who moderated the discussion that took place atthe Digital Pharma East conference in September, said that patient data is ofmost value when integrated with daily social interaction. She added thatinvolving the consumer in treatment decisions and taking the time to see howchronic conditions impact a persons daily life allows pharmaceutical companiesto create meaningful engagement at all points in the patient journey.

Bridges, who has been living with plaque psoriasis for thepast 25 years and has written numerous blogs and articles forplaquepsoriasis.com and psoriatic-arthritis.com, said that her involvement inchronic illness advocacy has allowed her to play an active role in her ownpatient journey.

My doctor considers me kind of a super patient, sheshared. Because Im so involved in psoriasis research, Im sometimes the firstto know about the latest treatments and whats coming down the pipeline, andbetween my research and then hearing the experiences of others in thecommunity, Im able to bring that information with me to my doctor.

Lawhon said Health Union has identified a surge in thenumber of patients who are more proactive in making treatment decisions,whether by educating themselves through online resources or because theyretaking the time to discuss options with their families, their doctors or otherpatients.

We did a meta-analysis of the 32,000 respondents from ourIn America patient surveys last year, across all our conditions, shereported. More than two-thirds said they play an active role in theirtreatment decisions, with almost half of them going online to seek informationand read about other patients experiences.

Most of the people visiting Health Unions onlinecommunities are looking for emotional support or solidarity, Lawhon stated, orfor a way to validate their experience. Often in pharma, she noted, only thephysical symptoms of a disease are addressed, such as itching or flaking in thecase of psoriasis, and the emotional impact is often ignored.

In the In America surveys we conducted, we asked peopleto describe a flare or exacerbation in their own words, and much of the timeits not about the physical symptoms, she said. Its often about feelingfatigued and the emotional impact that has on someones life and how they feelabout themselves.

Bridges agreed, noting the emotional toll that psoriasis hason patients is not something often discussed, and that as a child she oftenfelt isolated and depressed.

Psoriasis affected how I viewed myself as a person, sheshared. It affected my self-esteem, my self-confidence and my mental health ingeneral. It created a fear, or a constant nervous feeling at the thought ofsomeone seeing my skin and what they might think or say when they did.

Bridges recalled a mortifying incident from her childhood.She was in high school and appearing in a school play. The drama teacherdistributed makeup for the students to use as they prepared for the performance.But when the makeup was passed to Bridges, she remembered, the teacher grabbedit away, saying, No, you cant use this, I have no idea whats all over yourskin, humiliating her in front of the class.

Incidents like this one, Bridges said, caused childhoodanxiety, panic attacks and irritability, often mislabeled in her case as havinga bad attitude.

Bridges also shared the memory of another childhood trauma,when she participated in a high school beauty pageant covered with patches ofpsoriasis over 90% of her body.

It wasnt until she went clothes shopping with her familythat the implications of standing on stage in a sleeveless gown truly sunk in.

I remember just breaking down in the dressing room, sherecalled. My hands were sweaty, my heart was racing and when we got home Isaid, Im quitting the pageant, Im not doing this.

But when Bridges grandmother convinced her to stick it out,and offered to help cover the patches with makeup, she persevered.

The crazy part is I ended up winning, Bridges laughed.But I almost let my psoriasis make the decision for me. It still makes me sadwhen I think back to all the opportunities I missed out on or almost missed outon due to the fears and insecurities that come with living with a visibledisease.

Lawhon, who applauded Bridges for her candor, said that whenpatient advocates such as Bridges agree to share their personal stories, herteam ensures that contributors feel secure discussing their experiences. Thesehonest accounts are vital sources of support and education for fellow patients,she explained.

She noted that Health Unions research has found thatdepression, anxiety and fear are a common thread in all chronic conditioncommunities. The findings prompted Health Union to conduct a cross-communitysurvey that examined the relationship between chronic physical conditions andmental health conditions.

Of the 3,275 people surveyed, 90% of them indicated theyfeel some negative impact on emotional or mental health as a result of theirchronic physical condition, with more than a quarter of respondents noting anextreme negative impact and two-thirds of people being co-diagnosed withdepression, stress or anxiety.

The data showed us that its really key to recognize thatthese conditions are more than just physical symptoms, Lawhon said. Thedevastating emotional impact and some of the mental health conditions often gohand in hand with those symptoms.

Bridges said she hopes pharmaceutical companies will takenote of these findings and involve patients in panels or marketing discussions.She said that she believes this approach would help guarantee that brands arefocusing on what is truly important for patients with the condition.

She noted that making marketing teams and campaigns morediverse would be a step in the right direction.

When you think about the marketing for psoriasis, you thinkCaucasian people with red, inflamed patches, right? she prompted the audience.Many people, my friends and family included, have the misconception thatAfrican-Americans dont get psoriasis, because they dont see me when they lookat these commercials or pamphlets. My psoriasis doesnt look like that itsnever been red, its more of a dark purple or brown.

Bridges said this disconnect can impact thepatient-physician relationship, claiming that she was misdiagnosed for yearsdue to the fact her psoriasis outbreaks did not look like those in medicaltextbooks.

She also noted that even her treatment options were out oftouch, recalling a specific shampoo she was prescribed for scalp psoriasis.

As a black woman, I dont wash my hair every 2 to 3 days,but thats what the treatment called for, she said. So what that leads to isa lack of compliance. First you have adherence issues, and then you no longerhave an effective treatment.

This disconnect is why Lawhon noted, patients rely on onlinecommunities for support, and why taking the time to listen to what they have tosay would be extremely beneficial for pharma companies.

Our purpose within each and everyone of these communities is to bring people together through shared experiencesof life with these conditions, she said. We know now, thanks to stories likeAlishas (Bridges) and the data weve collected, that when people feelsupported and informed, they make better healthcare decisions. By creatingenvironments where people can get the information they need, we allow patientsto make better decisions in real time, and allow our pharma partners to betterunderstand the needs of patients, ultimately leading to better healthoutcomes.

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The intersection of data and emotion - Partner Content - MM&M - Medical Marketing and Media

The first time my 9-year-old came to me with concerns about his weight and physical appearance, I wasn't prepared. I thought I had years left before battling the ancient demons of low self-esteem and peer pressure. I fought the urge with every cell in my body not to become the parent who rushes to her son's side and batters him with assurances that he's perfect in every single way. I want him to develop a healthy sense of self-esteem and a realistic sense of how he can grow as a person, even though I, of course, think he's perfect.

"Mom, I think I'd like to start eating less." "Is my stomach too big?" "Why don't I look like the other kids?" My son has asked me all these questions on different occasions. But when he asked to skip dinner, I knew this was an insecurity that needed to be addressed. But I was at a loss for how to respond. On the one hand, my son has always been at the top of the growth chart for both height and weight, and there exists extensive research on the dangers of childhood obesity. Yet, it's difficult to address the challenge of healthy living without adding to the already salient topic of weight and appearance.

According to The Journal of Pediatrics, half of all children ages 9 to 14 report some kind of dissatisfaction with their bodies. Most girls want to be thinner, while boys frequently wish to be more muscular. In a modern culture dominated by superhero movies and rampant social media photo editing, body image issues are on the rise at an almost epidemic level. Unfortunately, that meant my son's questions probably weren't a fluke or a passing phase, but rather something more like a rite of passage into the turbulent years of adolescence.

So, I started to think of healthy ways to reframe his distress into something positive that he could use to motivate incremental changes in his life. The CDC recommends that all children should get at least 60 minutes of vigorous physical activity every day. Sounds simple, right? But by the age of 9, most children fail to hit that benchmark, and my son was no different. Between school, homework, and Minecraft play dates, my kids were lucky to get a full hour of exercise three days a week. But if I signed him up for any more evening activities, I'd forget what he looked like. I needed something that brought us closer together, not further apart. And I needed it to fit with the rest of our lives.

"Remember in Avengers: Endgame, when Thor started eating junk food and he could barely get out of his recliner to help the Avengers in a fight?" I asked. "He felt tired all the time and didn't believe in himself. But once he made a few small changes, he felt more confident and ended up being an important part of the team. Getting in shape is about how you feel. Not how you look." We talked about small ways to be more active like taking stairs instead of elevators, walking to the grocery store instead of driving, and taking frequent screen breaks to go outside and play.

He nodded slowly as the information sank into his superhero-obsessed brain. I could almost see the gears turning in his mind: "well, if it's good enough for Thor . . . " But then he surprised me. "Mommy, do you exercise every day?"

And that's when I realized that as much as he admired his comic book idols, I was the person he was imitating. He wasn't looking for a superhero; he was looking for a role model.

Turns out, my son wasn't the only one who needed to rethink the idea of fitness as a lifestyle rather than a number on a scale. When I suggested that maybe we could both try running together, his eyes lit up. I searched for Couch to 5K apps on my phone and looked up local races being held a few months down the road. He sheepishly asked if he'd be able to keep up with me, and I assured him that I was going to have to work just as hard as him to get ready for our big race. And that the more difficult our workouts became, the more pride we'd feel when we finally crossed the finish line of our first 5K.

We treated each session as an opportunity to feel better, sometimes physically and sometimes mentally. The transformation was almost immediate. At first, I played the cheerleader; every time he'd say he wasn't sure he could keep going, I'd cheer him on. And he'd keep running. By the second week, he was encouraging me.

I also noticed him using the same attitude in other aspects of his life: homework, martial arts class, and even video games. Not only had running improved his mental and physical health, it had planted the seeds of grit. He'd get stuck and frustrated with a task something that used to result in epic tantrums, quitting, or both then I'd hear him muttering under his breath: "I ran two miles today. This is nothing."

Running together also brought us closer emotionally. For the first time in my son's life, for these brief 30-minute workouts, he and I were equals. We were both learning, together. And my son rose to the occasion. It was like watching him grow and change with each stride. He'd ask me about my day, how I felt, whether I liked certain shows and movies, and whether I ever worked out with my mom when I was a kid. The excitement of seeing his mom as a person rather than an infallible adult was palpable, and it was addictive.

Each time he found something we had in common, it propelled him forward. As a parent, it's easy to fall into the pattern of instructing and educating children rather than joining them in the adventure of exploring their world. Training for a 5K with my son reminded me that healthy attitudes and habits aren't something you can teach, they have to be earned like each step, each minute, each mile. We probably both shed some extra pounds, but we never bothered to measure.

Physical fitness is about so much more than appearance, and both he and I have never felt better.

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I Tried a Couch to 5K Training Plan With My 9-Year-Old, and It Improved More Than Our Fitness - POPSUGAR