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Archive for the ‘Self-Improvement’ Category

Polyphia’s Tim Henson offered Tosin Abasi $1000 to teach him … – MusicRadar

Posted: May 11, 2023 at 12:07 am


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Tim Henson is one of the players we look to when were looking to up our game. He is one of electric guitars futurists, and his partnership with Scott LePage in Polyphia has yielded some of instrumental prog guitars most daring arrangements.

But who do you turn to when you are Henson and you need to expand your repertoire? As it turns out, you give Tosin Abasi of Animals As Leaders a call.

Speaking to Reverb (opens in new tab), for a video segment shot in which he and LePage discuss gear, technique, songwriting and more, Henson said he found himself at an impasse in 2020.He needed to bring something fresh to his game, and it just so happened that Tosin Abasis name was in his contacts.

Every album I just try to level up my playing, and I was like, Okay, well its probably time I learned thumping because I wanted to learn it eight years prior, says Henson. And I had tried. It was too hard. I said, Fuck that! I had started hanging out with Tosin and I was like, Well, I personally know Tosin now, so let me just ask him if he will teach me something. I offered him a thousand dollars for four guitar lessons and he said sure.

But even for Henson, getting the hands around the Abasis percussive thump guitar style was no gimme. He had to work on his fingerstyle technique. He needed more digital independence in his picking hand, and Abasi had an idea.

He showed it to me [in] the first lesson and it was so foreign and then he was like, Okay, yeah, also, if you are not that well-versed in using your fingers try these classical pieces, said Henson. And one was La Catedral. That was one of the pieces that I had to learn to kind of just get used to using these other fingers because, prior to that, we were just hybrid picking.

Written by the Paraguayan virtuoso Agustn Barrios, La Catedral is a doozy. Henson demonstrates a neat version of its first measures in the video, also demonstrating just how useful that nylon-string mode is on his Ibanez TOD10 signature guitar for getting close to the tone without reaching for a classical guitar.

Ultimately, Henson got his thumping technique down, expanding the sounds available on Remember That You Will Die. But he and LePage admit they approach it totally differently.

Were playing a bunch of the thumping shit on tour and I am watching us during practice and rehearsal, and I am doing it the way I learned from Tosin then Scott is just doing it a way he taught himself, and it is two completely different-assed things but they are sounding the same! said Henson. If you just listen, close your eyes, Yeah, that sounds right. But then you look; our right hands are doing something completely different.

All that matters is that is sounds okay. But even then, theres always the sense that Polyphia write some things that are so out there that not they, not anyone, can replicate it live.

Speaking to MusicRadar in November 2022, Scott LePage said they just go for it in the studio to make the song sound as good as it can be and worry about if they can play it later. So what if they have to change something?

There was one moment during Chimera when, mid-song, LePage was playing an eight-string guitar and decided he was going to tune the low string down a half-step just because he wanted that note.

What we do when we write is we think in serving the song, right? Most of the time anyway, said LePage. There is a small aspect of, Okay, this needs to be performable. But sometimes we just do cool shit for the sake of doing cool shit and we worry about it later. If we have to change some stuff, we do that.

You can check out the rest of Henson and LePages conversation with Reverb above. And if you want a lesson from Tosin Abasi but can't find his number in your Rolodex, you can always check out MusicRadar's Tosin Abasi lesson in which he breaks down his picking and tapping techniques.

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Polyphia's Tim Henson offered Tosin Abasi $1000 to teach him ... - MusicRadar

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May 11th, 2023 at 12:07 am

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11 Promising Signs He Will Come Back After Pulling Away And … – Bonobology.com

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It might be difficult to figure out what to do when a man distances himself from you. But there are certain signs he will come back after pulling away. These indicators can range from ongoing communication to making an attempt to visit you, indicating a shift in behavior, displaying jealousy or possessiveness, and physical or verbal cues.

Although these indications may seem encouraging, its crucial to keep in mind that a change of heart doesnt guarantee a healthy relationship. Open communication and honesty are still essential for rebuilding a bond. If youre grappling with questions like Should I go back to ex? or What to do when he pulls away?, you must plan your next steps carefully and pragmatically.

That said, the shift from seeing the signs of a man pulling away from you to him gravitating back toward you is definitely encouraging if youre intent on making things work with him. If thats what his actions seem to convey to you, pay attention to the signs he wants to get back together and then decide your future course of action.

It can be a living nightmare when a man pulls away, whether physically or emotionally. Your mind is clouded with questions like Will he come back?, Have I lost him for good?, Is he already involved with other women? and whatnot. The uncertainty and fear of not understanding what may be going on in his mind can be overwhelming.

In this situation, its natural to want to do whatever you can to bring him back to you and it can make you look for signs he will come back after pulling away. If he has been pulling away from you lately, keep in mind that it does not always spell the end of your relationship. Here are 11 promising signs that he will come back after pulling away:

Effective communication is important in every healthy relationship. If he has been upfront and honest with you about his feelings and the reasons for their pulling away, its a good sign that he is willing to work through any problems in the relationship. Even if you dont agree with him, its crucial to actively listen and try to comprehend his point of view, especially after a guy pulls away from their relationship.

You can make your partner feel heard and understood by providing a secure and open environment, which may go a long way toward resolving any problems or issues that may have led to him pulling away.

Related Reading: 11 Expert Tips To Communicate Better With Your Partner

If he expresses remorse or guilt for his behavior or the way his decision to distance himself affected you, its one of the signs he will come back after pulling away. Some ways he might express remorse or guilt for his actions are:

These gestures should be recognized and appreciated because they show that your partner takes accountability in the relationship and is committed to making things better.

A crucial component of any serious relationship is spending quality time together. If he has recently been making an effort to spend time with you after pulling away, its a sign that he still values the relationship and wants to rebuild what has been lost. For instance, you may find him grabbing your hand and saying stay just a few more minutes when its time to part ways.

Spending time can also include things like making plans for the future, going on dates, or simply spending hours talking and enjoying each others company. This indicates that he is definitely not losing interest in you and he wants to come back. You and he may deepen your new relationship and restore any lost intimacy by prioritizing your time together and making an effort to reconnect.

Improvement, behavioral or otherwise, can be a lifesaving factor for every long-term relationship and does not happen out of thin air. Improvement can act as a rope to help your relationship climb out of the breakup pit. Just the fact that he is taking steps to better himself is one of the tell-tale signs he will come back after pulling away.

He is prioritizing working on the relationship as well as his own life and rebuilding the love and the lost connection with self-improvement. This could include things like:

Even if these steps are more focused on personal growth, they can still amount to your relationship improving, as he does.

Related Reading: 5 Cute Ways To Improve And Strengthen Your Relationship

If he still has your belongings, it can indicate that he hasnt completely closed the door on the relationship and may still have feelings for you. If he hasnt come to retrieve his things, it could mean that hes not ready to completely sever the tie between the two of you. Maybe keeping your things is his way of keeping you present in his life while he figures out his feelings and future plans. Or maybe he is planning on using your belongings as a segue to re-enter the relationship.

A research paper published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships says, Memories reside in our minds and are enhanced through the physical objects we keep. Note that alternatively, this could also mean that he just might not have found the right time or the right way to ask for his things back or return yours. While this alone may not be the strongest sign he will come back, if you notice it in conjunction with other signs, it definitely counts.

This could be one of the signs he will come back after pulling away and he is waiting for you. When most guys pull themselves away, they generally end all mutual connections. If he is in touch with your friends and family even after the breakup, there is a good chance he is still thinking about you and considering the possibility of getting back together.

You could use this as a golden opportunity to find out the reasons for his pulling away through them. That will help answer the will he come back question to some extent. Here are a few additional pointers to keep in mind as you try to gain insight through other people:

An ex who initiates contact and is reaching out to you, whether its through phone calls or text messages, sends strong signs youll get back together as it can mean hes still thinking about the relationship. Its important to pay attention to the content of these messages, as they may be trying to gauge your interest in getting back together. For example, an ex who sends a message saying, I miss you and I wish we could talk, may be showing interest in getting back together.

A research study about staying friends with ex-romantic partners mentions, Finally, an unresolved romantic desire seems to be an intuitive reason why one or both members of the dyad may desire to stay friends. It is possible that one member did not, in fact, want to terminate the relationship and that the opportunity for maintaining some relationship with his or her former partner is preferable to the alternative, especially if there is perceived hope for romantic renewal.

Related Reading: Everything On How To Be Friends With Your Ex

If your ex still sends a message or a gift on special days such as your birthday, just like he did during the early stages of your relationship, then its one of the signs he will come back after pulling away. If he not only remembers these special dates but goes out of his way to let you know that he remembers, it can be for one or more of the following reasons:

In this virtual age of people blocking people on social media first and properly thinking about it later, if youre still friends with your ex on social media, it can be a subtle indication that he will come back to you. Generally, after pulling away, a person is no longer interested in the other. If your ex is still following you on your social media accounts or liking your posts, it could be a sign that theyre keeping tabs on your life.

It is important to note that their presence on your social media does not necessarily mean that they want to get back together, but it could mean that theyre still interested in how and what youre doing. It could also be a sign of lingering feelings or unresolved emotions. If this is the case, you may want to take a step back and evaluate if he is showing other signs that he will come back before you ask yourself the question, Should I go back to my ex?

This is where your mans hero instinct kicks in. If your ex is still willing to be there for you during a difficult time, its one of the signs your ex is waiting for you because he still cares about you and wants to be there for you. This shows that your ex values you and that you still have a strong connection. However, its important to consider if this level of contact is healthy for you and what kind of fundamental support you are looking for from them.

If hes reaching out and being there for you in your times of need makes you feel good, here are a few ways you can reciprocate:

Related Reading: 17 Signs He Still Loves You After The Breakup

He wants to relive a special moment with you whenever you are together, whether it be in the same room, on the phone, in person, or over social media. Hes been reflecting on the good times you two have shared. And he might already be picturing the happy times you two could share if you reconciled.

His reflection on the past could mean any of the following:

If you notice any of these characteristics in his words or actions, it might be one of the clear signs your ex is waiting for you.

When your significant other starts pulling away, it can be a confusing and stressful time. You may feel hurt, abandoned by this push-pull relationship pattern, and unsure of what to do next. Everybody deals with certain situations in their own ways. Many women get caught up on questions like what to do when he pulls away, or maybe you might ponder if the relationship is worth fighting for and if its time to go on.

But if your partner eventually comes back after pulling away, it can be a whole other emotional rollercoaster, and then you will be riddled with questions like Should I go back to my ex? On one hand, you may feel relieved and happy that he has returned. On the other hand, you may feel hesitant and uncertain about whether or not you can trust them.

So, what to do when a guy pulls away and then comes back? Here are a few steps to consider:

Before you even think about reconciling with your partner, its important to take some time for yourself. This a tailor-made advice. This is a chance to reflect on your feelings and priorities and to decide what you want in a relationship. During this time, try to focus on self-care and self-love. Do things that bring you joy. This might include:

On a similar note, give him some time as well. When he pulls away, do nothing.

Once youve had some time to process your feelings, its important to communicate with your partner about what happened. Through this, hell realize his shortcomings and work on them. Although having this starter conversations can be challenging, doing so is essential in moving forward.

During this conversation, try to be honest and open about your feelings. Talk about why your partner pulled away and how it made you feel. Also, let him know what you need to feel loved and supported in the relationship.

Related Reading: 11 Ways To Improve Communication In Relationships

If you decide to give him another chance, its important to set clear boundaries in the relationship. This might include setting limits on how much time you spend together or establishing rules about communication and trust. These boundaries can help to create a sense of stability and security in the relationship, and also help you feel more in control.

Managing a relationship can be difficult, especially if youre dealing with trust issues or other challenges. It can be helpful to seek support from friends, family, a highly trained relationship coach, or a therapist. A therapist can provide a safe and neutral space to talk about your feelings and work through any issues that may be impacting your relationship. This can be genuinely helpful in developing coping strategies and communication skills that can be useful in the future.

After your man decides to come back, its important to take things slowly and not rush into things. This is especially true if youre feeling hesitant or unsure about the relationship. Dont make a big deal out of it. This is where you shouldnt make him feel guilty all the time. Try to focus on building trust and creating a sense of stability in the relationship. This might involve spending more time together and getting to know each other even better than before, or finding ways to show him that you care and support them.

Remember, its important to take the time to carefully consider all of these factors before deciding on getting back together with your ex. Its also a good idea to seek the advice of friends, family, or a therapist to help you weigh the pros and cons and make the best decision for yourself. To make the process a tad easier, we bring you this should I get back with my ex quiz using which you can address certain underlying questions you need to ask yourself to come to a conclusion:

If youve answered yes to more than 6 of these questions, you could consider getting back together with your ex. While yeses or nos in a quiz cannot be the only parameter influencing your decision, this should I get back with my ex quiz should help you understand your feelings about your ex and the relationship in a better light, which can lead to you making a healthier decision for yourself.

In conclusion, several signs could suggest a man who has backed off will turn around. These consist of maintaining contact, making an attempt to visit you, body language, displaying possessiveness or jealousy, expressing regret or remorse, and indicating a behavior change.

For all we know, pulling away could just be his defense mechanism to avoid conflicts. But its crucial to keep in mind that these indications are not promises and shouldnt be used to infer something about someones thoughts or intentions. Dealing with a partner who comes back after pulling away can be a challenging experience. It is best to look out for all the signs youll get back together and have an honest chat with the person in question if you are unclear about where you stand with them.

If He Loves You He Will Come Back No Matter What!

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21 Sure-Shot Signs Your Ex Is Becoming Interested Again

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11 Promising Signs He Will Come Back After Pulling Away And ... - Bonobology.com

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Has Toxic Self-Care Sparked An Empathy Crisis? – Coveteur

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Its a tale as old as timegirl meets boy, girl falls for boy, and girl talks to best friend on the phone for months ad nauseam about the anxious doldrums of a situationship. Said girl, well call her Carrie, talked to her best friend Miranda on the phone for months about this tepid romance with a Massachusetts boy who was very boring, but also not very nice. Miranda was patient with the spiraling conversations about Mr. Boringfriends can be tedious, but being annoying isnt a sin, right? One day, the tables turned and Mirandas own boyfriend broke up with her. She texted Carrie, Hey me and Steve just broke up and its been really painful. Can we talk on the phone? Carrie replied: You know Ive been going through a lot with my own romantic life and I dont have the bandwidth to take on any more right now. We can talk on the phone but Id prefer if we didnt talk about that.

A friend relayed this story to me and once I was done cackling, I felt bad for Miranda. The comical unfairness is blatant, but what stuck with me was the negotiation. The idea that Carrie was willing to have a conversation if Miranda was willing to ignore the central crisis in her life. She offered to go through the overtures of friendship with none of the substance. In that moment, empathy was a currency that Carrie wasnt willing to spend. It confused me so deeply that Im still trying to untangle the tactlessness of that exchange months later. Was it the disingenuous formality? Denying permission to have emotions? Defining your capacity to give a shit? I tried to dress it up with a lot of analysis, but at the end of the day, I was just left with an eerie feeling. Put simply, it gave me the creeps.

For the record, Im no Miss Congeniality. I love a hard boundary. I love Airplane Mode. I have enough unread texts, e-mails, and Instagram notifications to give a Virgo a heart attack. Weve all negotiated dicey boundaries, heartbreaking friend breakups, and the long-con ghosting of that annoying person who only talks about themselvesbut the above conversation is pointing to a much more sinister trend. I feel the need to emphasize that yes, self-care is good. Yes, boundaries are healthy. Yes, we all have an elastic emotional bandwidth that we need to protectput your mask on before helping another passenger, blah blah blahbut the fact that I have to defensively explain these definitions is part of the issue. There has been a flattening of language that leaves conversations devoid of nuance. Self-care = good. Boundaries = good. Positive thinking = good. If for any reason you exceed the appropriate limit: Toxic. Toxic self-care. Toxic positivity. Toxic individualism.

The language itself is overplayed and hyperbolic, but there is a common thread in all these trends: Western individualism run amok. In America, self-care was divorced from its roots of avoiding burnout and mutated into rampant narcissism. My favorite spoof of this phenomenon is the Instagram account @power.of.self.care, mostly because when their posts pop up in my feedlike, Always prioritize comfort over growth. Read that again.the aesthetic and language are almost indistinguishable from all the other sincere self-care messaging I see online. We all cringed at that I am actually at my emotional capacity meme template that made the rounds in 2019, satirizing the cut-and-paste ease with which you can dismiss a friend in an emotional crisis. America went ahead and did what it does best: took (largely Eastern) concepts of wellness and mindfulness and tried to shove it into the machine of capitalism. It used to be: Take care of yourself so you can best care for your community. Fill your own cup before trying to fill others. Americas rugged, pistol-swingin individualism made a drastic edit: Take care of yourself so you can best care for yourself. Fill your own cup, so your cup is always at its fullest. In short: everyone elses needs are a constant threat to your own self-improvement.

This isnt a bi-partisan issue. Yes, radical individualism is well-illustrated in the anti-masker protests. The idea that a slight inconvenience is not worth the health and safety of our society as a wholeany degree of discomfort is a violation of our freedom. But Carrie and Miranda are staunchly democratic, vaxxed-up, mask-wearing liberals. We liberals are all about compassion, and yet, the same callous individualism still pops up. When I was at my liberal arts college in Boston, a girl in my co-op made a spreadsheet for her social engagements. To be clear, this existed so her friends could make appointments to hang out with her. After marveling at the pompousness of said spreadsheet, it clued me in on a core idea: the commodification of our personal time.

At the center of all this toxic individualism, toxic self-care, and toxic positivity is the same idea: Friendship is a reciprocal exchange of goods, you must optimize the time to fulfill your greatest potential, and anything that isnt directly related to your personal journey is a waste of time. It has evolved into a brutal formalization of conversations. I grant you permission to talk, with the understanding that every moment that goes by is a vampiric draining of my bandwidth. When I am at capacity, I will ask permission to waste someone elses precious energy. When did it become implicit that friendships are about merely tolerating another person while they talk about themselves? Call me old-fashioned, but I love my friends. Their thoughts and feelings are exciting to me. When they are in pain, I dont hesitate to help. Yes, sometimes its at an inconvenient time, but we figure it out. Talking to them doesnt feel like passing a conversational batonwhen you have the talking stick, you get to monologue about yourself.

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Has Toxic Self-Care Sparked An Empathy Crisis? - Coveteur

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The Third Mercury Retrograde of 2023 Is Lighting Up Your Healing Era – msnNOW

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Getty / JLco - Julia Amaral The Third Mercury Retrograde of 2023 Is Lighting Up Your Healing Era

The time between the tail end of August and the beginning of September tends to host both last summer hurrahs and our initial flirtations with fall. In other words, it's the perfect transitional season. By the end of that transition, you can't help but hope to feel like you're stepping into a whole new chapter. But unfortunately, that new chapter might be a tiny bit delayed in 2023, thanks to the third Mercury retrograde of the year.

When the planet of communication, transportation, and technology appears to move backward from our vantage point on Earth, we're nudged to review, reflect, and revise, as opposed to pushing forward on new endeavors. Occurring in Virgo, the service-oriented mutable earth sign symbolized by the Maiden, Mercury's backspin officially kicks off on Aug. 23 and wraps up on Sept. 15. Thankfully, understanding the themes of this particular Mercury retrograde can help you make the most of it.

To get a sense of what Mercury retrograde entails, it can help to understand how the planet functions when it's direct (or moving forward). Typically, Mercury, the messenger planet, speeds up our ability to connect, supports our mental energy, and keeps technology and transportation running smoothly. But three to four times a year, for three weeks at a time, it appears to slow down and move backward through the zodiac. And when this happens, miscommunications abound, transportation gets hairy, and our devices glitch out.

But again, it's not all doom and gloom. The planet of communication's frequent slowdowns encourage us to rest, recharge, take a step back, and contend with the past in order to make room for the future.

Mercury is retrograde in Virgo (ruled by communicator Mercury itself) from Aug. 23 to Sept. 15. As such, the overall tone of this particular retrograde is cerebral and self-reflective. It might also bring more blasts from your past social life as a result of Venus, the planet of relationships, being retrograde as well from July 22 to Sept. 3. You will most likely run into people who are total blasts from the past, have to figure out how to text - or avoid texting - an ex, and take special care to avoid misunderstandings in one-on-one bonds.

Thanks to Virgo's influence, it's actually an ideal retrograde for research, revision, and editing anything that has been throwing off your inner balance, especially on a day-to-day basis. The detail-oriented earth sign is, after all, associated with the sixth house of wellness and daily routine.

That said, Mercury's retrograde in Virgo can compel you to tackle everyday to-dos that you've put on the back burner and also rethink how you're caring for your health and being of service to others and to yourself. While fellow earth sign Taurus tends to get all the credit for being the sign that innately values self-care, one of the Maiden's key lessons is self-love and self-acceptance. So don't be surprised if you find you're being tested on these themes - and find yourself stumbling into sweet, everyday opportunities to hone how you're caring for yourself not only physically but also emotionally and mentally.

Given the cerebral and self-improvement vibes of this retrograde, these three weeks can be a wonderful time to go even further with ongoing self-work. Keep in mind that, around this time, you may also find yourself revisiting themes that came up around Aug. 3-23, when Mercury was cruising ahead through this same spot in the sky.

To better understand how you'll experience these often confusing but ultimately enlightening three weeks, read on for your Mercury retrograde horoscope, and be sure to read not only your sun sign but also your rising sign.

The messenger planet's backspin in your sixth house of wellness and daily routine will turn your focus to health matters. If it's been a minute since you've gotten a particular checkup or you're itching to rework your fitness routine, now's your chance.

The trickster planet heads back through your fifth house of romance, potentially stirring up communication with old flames but also encouraging you to revisit a favorite date-night spot or go back to the drawing board on an artistic undertaking.

Mercury retrogrades just about always clobber you over the head because the messenger planet is your ruler, Gemini. This time, Mercury moves backward through your fourth house of home life, nudging you to tend to any loose ends related to family issues or, quite literally, your home.

The messenger planet cruises back through your third house of communication, so don't be surprised if those classic retrograde tech glitches and misunderstandings rear their ugly heads. It's a reason to slow down and be more intentional about how - and with whom - you're exerting your social energy.

The messenger planet's backspin in your second house of income is an opportunity to revisit your budget, values, moneymaking game plans, and relationship to material possessions. You'll also do well to reflect on whether you're being adequately valued for what you bring to the table in business endeavors.

The planet of communication lands back in your sign and first house of self, which can help you revise the way you're putting yourself out in the world. You might want to edit your rsum, rework your website, or refresh your wardrobe ahead of pursuing a major personal goal.

As Mercury moves backward through your 12th house of spirituality this time around, you might feel a bit stalled and sleepy. But you can also pour your energy into imaginative pursuits and mind-body routines you've previously adored.

Mercury's backspin through your 11th house of networking can help you revisit collaborative undertakings, team efforts, and platonic bonds that'll have you feeling more connected. Sure, wires could get crossed with colleagues and friends, but you can reframe these moments as opportunities to hone communication skills in this context as well as your sense of teamwork.

Mercury moves back through your 10th house of career, which allows you a chance to reflect on your approach to long-term professional goals. Now's your chance to review and revise your game plan for making your mark and earning recognition for putting your nose to the grindstone.

As Mercury moves back through your ninth house of adventure and higher learning, you might be inspired to hit the books, brushing up on a particular skill set or planning a trip to a beloved long-distance spot where you previously spent time. Yep, even though you always hear that travel is a no-no during Mercury retrograde, revisiting a place from the past could lead to personal growth.

Mercury's backspin in your eighth house of intimacy requires you to review joint resources and what makes you feel comfiest when connecting with someone special physically and emotionally. Initiating tough conversations about past emotional wounds might not feel like the easiest thing to do, but it can be incredibly healing now.

Mercury will move backward through your seventh house of partnership, which urges you to reflect on your one-on-one relationships, reciprocity within these bonds, and goals you're working toward with a friend, colleague, partner, or loved one. It's time to address unfinished business as part of a pair.

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Career Horoscope Today, May 10, 2023: An unexpected career turn – Hindustan Times

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Aries: The alignment of the planets suggests that your career may take an unexpected turn today. It could be in the form of a new project, a promotion, or even a job offer from a different company. Embrace these opportunities, but remember to evaluate them carefully before making any hasty decisions. Trust your instincts, but also rely on your rational thinking to make a well-informed choice.

Taurus: Stay focused and prioritise your tasks accordingly to ensure you meet your deadlines today. Collaboration and teamwork will play a crucial role in getting the work done on time. Engage with your colleagues and leverage their expertise to enhance your own performance. Share your ideas and listen to the input of others. This will not only lead to better outcomes but also help foster a positive and supportive work environment.

Gemini: Although it's natural to be excited about your prospects and eager to prove yourself, it's important to temper that enthusiasm with humility and self-awareness today. Keeping your ego in check allows you to cultivate healthy relationships and navigate the professional landscape more effectively. Unnecessary conflicts or power struggles can hinder your progress and create a negative work environment.

Cancer: Today is an exceptional day for you to unleash your creativity and push the boundaries of conventional thinking. It is an opportunity to step into uncharted territory. By embracing your imaginative ideas and a unique perspective, you have the power to distinguish yourself from your peers and captivate those in positions of authority. This will enable you to uncover hidden opportunities and undiscovered potential.

Leo: This is an excellent time to invest in self-development. Consider attending workshops, enrolling in online courses, or seeking mentorship from seasoned professionals. The more knowledge and skills you acquire, the more valuable you become in your industry. Continual learning will not only expand your horizons but will also equip you with the tools needed to thrive in an increasingly competitive job market.

Virgo: Challenges may arise today in the form of unexpected obstacles or conflicts with colleagues. Stay calm and composed in these situations, as your diplomatic skills will be essential in resolving conflicts and finding mutually beneficial solutions. Avoid getting caught up in office politics and stay focused on your goals. Your ability to adapt and find common ground will be appreciated by your superiors.

Libra: While the day promises many positive opportunities, it is essential to maintain a balanced approach. Don't get overwhelmed by the demands of your career. Remember to take breaks, relax, and recharge your energy. Self-care and maintaining a healthy work-life balance will contribute to your long-term success and well-being. Engage in some activities that help rejuvenate your mind and body.

Scorpio: Today is a propitious day to start exploring your career change or pursuing a new path. Embrace your aspirations, trust your instincts, and seek guidance to navigate this transformative journey successfully. Remember that a career change is not an overnight process; it requires careful planning, research, and dedication. Take the time to explore different industries and network with professionals.

Sagittarius: Effective communication is crucial for conveying ideas clearly and minimizing misunderstandings. When expressing your thoughts, it is important to be mindful of your communication style to ensure that your message is understood accurately. Additionally, be mindful of the tone and style of your communication. Use a respectful and considerate approach and avoid ambiguous statements.

Capricorn: Your eloquence and persuasive skills will help you navigate complex situations with ease. You'll excel in presentations, negotiations, and meetings, leaving a lasting impression on those around you. Your ideas and opinions will be highly sought after, and people will be more than willing to listen to what you have to say. People will seek your counsel, eager to benefit from your insights and perspectives.

Aquarius: You may feel a desire for intellectual stimulation and learning today. You have a curious mind, and today you may find yourself drawn to acquiring new knowledge or exploring innovative ideas. Engage in professional development activities or seek out mentors who can help you expand your skillset and broaden your horizons. By actively pursuing intellectual stimulation, you open doors to new opportunities and foster personal growth.

Pisces: This is the time to focus on your emotional well-being in the workplace. Take note of any emotional triggers or stressors and seek ways to address them. Creating a harmonious and supportive work environment will not only benefit you but also enhance your productivity and effectiveness. Strike a balance between your own needs and the demands of your work. Practicing stress-management techniques will help you maintain a healthy work-life balance.

Neeraj Dhankher

(Vedic Astrologer, Founder - Astro Zindagi)

Email: info@astrozindagi.in, neeraj@astrozindagi.in

Url: http://www.astrozindagi.in

Contact: Noida: +919910094779

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Career Horoscope Today, May 10, 2023: An unexpected career turn - Hindustan Times

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May 11th, 2023 at 12:07 am

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I’ve ditched Botox and fillers after 16 years… so I don’t look like an alien when I’m 70 – Daily Mail

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My friend Kim was the one who dared to say it.

One night, as my group of 40 and 50-something female friends were in the pub, she looked round at us all and announced: 'I'm sick of my friends not looking like themselves any more.'

It was true, at least of me. I was in my late 40s and I'd been using Botox and fillers for over ten years.My face did indeed look not 'like me'.

Sometimes, after a particularly cack-handed job, I looked alien and weird.Once, I even had those embarrassing fish lips, a true trout pout.

At other times, the doctor's needles made me look better: prettier, younger. But my friend was right: my real face was essentially hidden beneath each treatment.

As I listened to her I felt slightly ashamed for not being able to grow old with confidence and grace.

And then, ever the addict, I suggested she try something small and natural, like the collagen-boosting injectable Profhilo . . . It is only now, at the age of 53, that I have finally been able to kick my Botox habit.

I'd like to say it's because I've fully embraced my wrinkles and sags, but the truth is to get rid of them would require more and more injectables.

For the sake of my sanity and my bank balance I had to put a stop to using my own face as a game of Mr Potato Head, in which I endlessly tried on different features that were not, strictly, my own.

For a while now, there have been mutterings about the decline of Botox and fillers.

Influencer and Love Island contestant Molly-Mae Hague, for example, decided to stop the injectables after suddenly realising she 'looked like someone on Botched' (an American TV show about bad cosmetic medical work).

Actresses Courteney Cox and Melanie Griffiths have apparently had their filler dissolved. Yolanda Hadid, mother of supermodels Gigi and Bella, and previously something of a superfan of self-improvement, has had dermal fillers removed too.

At the same time, however, invasive cosmetic surgery, involving scalpels and anaesthetics, is booming.

More than 31,000 surgical procedures were performed in the UK in 2022, a 102 per cent rise on the previous year the highest since annual figures began being recorded in 2004.

Why is Botox down and actual surgery up? I suspect because, like me, women are realising that once you reach a certain age, the needles just don't work any more.

Where a little prick here and there does wonders in your 30s and 40s, as you get older the face needs more and more. For results that are natural, surgery is the only answer.

Even the cosmetic doctors admit it. 'Once you tip over that curve in your 50s and 60s when you need ten to 15 syringes of filler, it can never look natural,' says Rita Rakus, who has a successful clinic specialising in injectables in London's Knightsbridge.

That doesn't mean the over-filled, over-done face has gone away. Sometimes I can hardly believe how quickly women with outlandish faces have become normalised.

I thought this as I watched the emotionless, glassy faces posing for cameras at the Met Gala this month.

From the youngest Kardashian to the wife of the former President of France, all sported to some degree those pouty lips and puffed up cheeks. I cringe to see them.

How can these be the most beautiful people in the world when their mouths are uniformly like that of a sex doll?

And yet I understand the compulsion too the obsession, almost because I have been there.

My own Botox addiction started by accident in 2007 when I made a documentary for Channel 4 about the cosmetic medical sector.

Back then it was still relatively niche. Even the jargon words like dermal filler, ablative lasers and botulinum toxin (Botox) seemed like the mad and pricey preserve of the rich and vain.

The documentary kicked off with my crumpled, lived-in face being picked apart by a panel of beauty experts, alongside the sweetheart-shaped face of a teenage model.

This may seem cruel but all we wanted was to replicate what happens every time we benchmark our attractiveness against those women endlessly thrust upon us as beautiful on screens and magazine pages.

I was 38 and spent what I thought was a reasonable amount of time and money on my appearance.

I dyed my hair to cover its grey-flecked mouse; I had my eyebrows expertly threaded and several parts of my body waxed. In all, I probably spent about 150 a month keeping myself groomed.

And yet as soon as my film crew and I walked into the office of those cosmetic doctors and they suggested a host of fillers and Botox, I was a goner.

I practically leapt into their chairs and told them to 'do it!' When I saw the beneficial results, I was hooked.

I liked being prettier, I liked the ravages of time and bad behaviour being erased from my face. I liked it a lot.

The following day I went to interview Dr Fredric Brandt at his New York clinic. Madonna's 'injector' at the time, Brandt was nearly 60 and had a face like a melting waxwork.

Despite that, when he offered to 'do' my lips, I leapt into his chair too. To give Brandt his due, I received a beautiful enhancement of my lip shape a result no doctor has managed to achieve since.

When we moved on to Beverly Hills, a doctor suggested the best solution for my tired looking eyes was not another syringe of filler or Botox, but some kind of fat transfer from my belly to my under-eye area.

I was so gung ho, I said yes before common sense prevailed and another doctor intervened. Thank God, too, because one of the fillers used on my face in New York turned out to have been a bad call, and could have reacted very badly with a fat transfer.

Nonetheless, I let the second doctor remove some of my eye bags with a ferocious Fraxel laser, which partially resurfaces the skin, leaving me looking like a vampire after a night on the tiles with bleeding eyes and seeping wounds.

I'll be honest, I found it all a bit of a thrill. Back in London, the panel of fashion photographers, beauty editors and make-up artists looked again at my face and this time they loved it. So did I.

For the next decade or so, my grooming regime was just like the old one, except now it included Botox and dermal filler at a cost that started at around 700 a year and rose to 4,000.

I was always susceptible to suggestion I'd go to one doctor for a modest amount of Botox and come away with more.

I even submitted my face to the Godmother of Botox herself, Dr Jean Carruthers, the Canadian ophthalmologist who, almost 40 years ago, noticed the botulinum toxin she injected to stop eye misalignment and correct squints was causing a welcome side-effect the temporary erasure of wrinkles too.

In 2016 Carruthers gave me injections backstage at a medical conference. I could hardly contain my excitement: what would the new improved me look like? It takes a week for Botox to kick in and by the time it had, I felt like I was made of oak. Nothing moved and my face felt leaden.

Seeking once more the beautiful lips Brandt had given me, I went doctor shopping and came away from one procedure with a mouth area that can only be described as looking like a duck.

I had paid several hundred quid to be a laughing stock. This was self-mutilation. But even this didn't make me stop. Back I went for more, just like an addict.

Yes, sometimes the results were amazing too amazing. I looked attractive. But I did not look like me.

Later, I went to a very serious young doctor called Joanna Christou, whose work was largely with the sort of women and men who work in broadcast media, the law and finance.

Not looking like a sex doll is clearly crucial in these professions and Dr Christou's work was correspondingly grown-up and subtle.

She was exceedingly expensive though. I asked her to make it look as if I had had nothing done, but the bill still came in at more than 2,500. No wonder so many women succumb to the cheap deals on the High Street.

I haven't seen one of my closest male friends frown in years. He says he does it for work. I believe him; ageism is rife. And he isn't even 50 yet. It's not just a female thing.

Yet as we get older, those injections themselves become the problem. Marc Pacifico, the president of the British Association of Aesthetic Plastic Surgeons (BAAPS) and a specialist facelift surgeon, says: 'Too much Botox and fillers are making people look unnatural. People have long expected injectables to be able to fix everything.

'Of course these products have a role to play, but you get to a certain age and Botox and fillers can't address [the ageing process].

'In fact they will cause aesthetic issues: that look of having been 'alienised', which is when someone walks into a room and you can tell they don't look quite right.'

I don't want an alienised face in my 70s. I wonder about the fillers I've had over the years, I worry they might not be as temporary as doctors thought.

In a report for the Mail earlier this year, the journalist Alice Hart-Davis had an MRI scan that showed she had 35ml of filler in her face despite not having had any injections for four years.

Rita Rakus, meanwhile, believes non-invasive treatments using machines are the future and I hope she is right.

Recently I tried them. They use what Rakus calls 'energy' to stimulate the body to create its own volume by working muscles and mildly traumatising the upper skin layers.

I was satisfied with the results, but not ecstatic, which was a less addictive sensation.

A month or so after using them, however, I rang Rakus' clinic to ask if there was a quick fix for my marionette lines, and later that week I was lying back in her chair.

The results were great. And yet as the filler went in, I was thinking to myself, what will it be next? The creases between my eyebrows? The excess skin on my eyelids?

Frankly, it's a journey I wish I had never started.

I'm not ready to think about going under the knife but I know I have to step back from needles entirely and find a more dignified ageing process in a decent hair cut, good skin, fitness, and surely the greatest asset of all, good health.

Three years ago I stopped dyeing my hair too and let myself go grey, a move intended to promote a deeper love and acceptance of myself and one that has kind of worked.

And grey hair and no Botox means I do definitely look older. When I go to the pub with my girlfriends now, I know I look far more dowdy than many of them, with their more elaborately fixed up faces and burnished hair.

I'm told there is nothing wrong with just wanting to look your best. But the question remains: is looking different to who you are really looking your best?

I put it to myself when I look in the mirror every day, and see my real face staring back at me.

Is that my best face? It's not a question I have answered entirely to my satisfaction yet, but after almost 16 years of trying to change it, yes, I think it might just be.

Continued here:
I've ditched Botox and fillers after 16 years... so I don't look like an alien when I'm 70 - Daily Mail

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May 11th, 2023 at 12:07 am

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What is the difference between Coaching and Mentoring? – Times of India

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Are you considering hiring a coach or mentor but arent sure which one would be the best fit for your needs? Its a valid question after all, there is definitely a difference between coaching and mentoring!

Before making any decisions, though, its essential to understand the differences between these two services. This article summarises exactly what each entails so you can quickly determine which solution will better meet your goals.

What are the core differences between these two approaches?

Have you ever wondered what really sets coaching apart from mentoring? While the two terms are often used interchangeably, there are some core differences between these two approaches to guidance. Coaching often focuses on specific goals and skills, providing feedback and guidance that helps individuals to improve their performance in a particular area.

Mentoring, on the other hand, tends to be more long-term and relational, with an emphasis on career development and personal growth. While theres some overlap between the two, understanding the differences can help you determine which approach is best for your own personal or professional goals.

The benefits of coaching

Hey there! Have you ever considered hiring a coach? Whether you want to improve your career, maintain a healthy work-life balance, or simply enhance your personal life, having a coach by your side can be incredibly beneficial. They can help you identify your strengths and weaknesses, set goals, and provide accountability and support throughout the journey.

Research has shown that coaching can lead to increased productivity, improved relationships, and higher levels of satisfaction and achievement. So if youre ready to take your life to the next level, why not give coaching a try? Who knows, it could be the best decision you ever make!

The benefits of mentoring

Mentorship can be the ultimate game changer for personal and professional growth. Having someone whos been through the ropes and is willing to show you the way is invaluable. Its like having a personal guide whos invested in your success, knows your strengths and weaknesses and is committed to helping you hone your skills. Mentors bring a level of insight and perspective that can be hard to come by on your own. Theyre able to offer guidance and advice that can help you realise your potential, identify areas for improvement and navigate challenging situations.

A good mentor challenges you to step outside your comfort zone, encourages you to take risks and supports you through setbacks. Ultimately, mentorship is about creating a space for meaningful dialogue and growth. Its about building relationships that can last a lifetime and unlocking opportunities that you may not have even thought possible.

The importance of finding the right mentor or coach

Finding the right mentor or coach is crucial for personal and professional growth. Think of it as a long-term relationship, where you want to find someone you click with and feel comfortable opening up to. Your mentor or coach should challenge you, push you out of your comfort zone, and provide guidance and support as you navigate through different stages of your career or life.

But most importantly, they should understand your unique strengths and weaknesses and tailor their approach to suit your learning style. Dont be afraid to shop around and ask questions before committing to a mentor or coach. After all, the right fit can make all the difference in achieving your goals and becoming the best version of yourself.

Setting goals with your coach or mentor

When it comes to setting goals with your coach or mentor, its essential to go beyond just stating your objectives. You need to know how youre going to achieve those milestones and stay on track throughout the process. Thats where your coach or mentor comes in. With their guidance, you can develop a plan of action that includes specific steps and timelines.

Taking the time to work through the details and breaking down big goals into smaller, more manageable tasks can increase your chances of success. So, dont be afraid to lean on your coach or mentor for support and guidance with their help, you can achieve anything you set your mind to.

Discover practical tools and strategies for making progress

Do you ever feel like youve hit a wall when it comes to achieving your goals? Its okay; weve all been there. Thats where a coach or mentor can step in and guide you towards success. But what if you dont know where to begin? Thats where these practical tools and strategies come in.

From time management techniques to goal-setting worksheets, weve got you covered. With the help of a coach or mentor and these resources, youll be unstoppable in your pursuit of success. So what are you waiting for? Its time to take action and start making progress.

Coaching and mentoring are powerful tools to help you reach new heights in your professional and personal life. Exploring the differences and relative benefits of these two approaches will help you learn what approach is right for you, set goals with a mentor or coach, and use practical tools for success.

Asking questions such as How can I best benefit from coaching or mentor relationships? and ensuring that you find the right fit are key components to ensuring growth in areas of self-improvement. Taking the time to research and establish an effective system with a coach or mentor can pay off immensely; its never too late to learn how to become your best self!

Views expressed above are the author's own.

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What is the difference between Coaching and Mentoring? - Times of India

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May 11th, 2023 at 12:07 am

Posted in Self-Improvement

You should only work four hours a day – The New Statesman

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Decades ago, Roland Barthes quipped that one is a writer as Louis XIV was king, even on the toilet. He was mocking the way literary types like to distinguish themselves from the mass of working people. Writers insist, Barthes believed, that their productive activities are not limited to any time and place, but flow constantly like an involuntary secretion.

Well, we are all writers now, at least in this sense. Stealing a few holiday hours to work on an article used to be my party trick. Now I find that, on Mondays and Fridays when many office buildings stand empty, my salaried comrades are sending emails from an Airbnb somewhere. Come the weekend, they might close their laptops, but they dont stop checking their phones.

Of course this hardly compares with the instability further down the pay scale.Around one in sevenBritishworkersnow do gig-economy jobs likeUberorAmazondelivery at least once a week, according to research for the Trades Union Congress, many of them on top of full-time employment.

Work today is fluid, overflowing its traditional boundaries and seeping into new domains. Meditation and exercise look suspiciously like personal optimisation. Artistic vocations centre on tireless self-promotion to a virtual audience. A movement of homesteaders churning their own butter and knitting their own jumpers are simply cosplaying older forms of work, and probablyposting the results onInstagram.

With the help of our digital tools, we are adapting ourselves to productivity as involuntary secretion. The result is an evisceration of personal life and an epidemic of burnout.

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Our diffuse working culture has attracted plenty of critiques. The problem is most of them share the basic outlook that enabled the spread of work to begin with. Should we recognise quiet quitting as a justified response to unreasonable demands by employers? Is rest a form of resistance? Do we all just need a better work-life balance? These arguments present life as a two-way split between work and some nondescript realm ofpersonal freedom, the question being how we can reclaim time from one for the sake of the other.

As long as the alternative to work remains just a negativespace, work will continue leaching into it. What we are missing is a real counterbalance: a positive vision ofleisure.

Properly speaking, leisure is not rest or entertainment, though it can provide both. It is not mere fun, though it ought to be satisfying. Its forms change over time, but it generally involves elements of play, fantasy and connection with other people or the natural world. Most importantly, leisure is superfluous to our worldly needs and ambitions: something we do not as a means to any end, but simply for its own sake.

[See also: The case for a four-day working week has never been stronger]

Truly mass participation in leisure was a striking feature of British life in the early 20th century. People played in brass bands andraced pigeons. They learned to dance and performed in plays and choirs. In 1926 nearly 4,000 working-class anglers from Birmingham took part in a single fishing competition along 20-odd miles of river. During the 1930s, as the historian Ross McKibbin writes, one of the great sights of the English weekend were the fleets of cyclists riding countrywards along the arterial roads of the major towns.

People still do these things, of course, but they do them as hobbies. The hobby belongs to a culture defined by work: it is a creature of downtime and a quirk of character. Hobbies rely on individual enthusiasm, so they often collapse in the face of stress or time pressure. Besides, we tend to judge them by the unleisurely criteria of self-improvement. Physical andintellectual pursuits are admirable, since they bring fitness and cultural capital. Excessive interest in bird watching marks you out as an eccentric.

Taking the superfluous seriously is a brave act in a utilitarian world, so leisure needs its own social legitimacy to thrive. This used to come from class-based associational life, with its clubs, unions and organised religion. Ifvideo gamesand social media smack of pseudo-leisure, it is because they are often part of a lonely struggle with the productivity impulse: they palliate restless and atomised minds. Maybe the only forms of leisure with a more than marginal role in popular culture today are amateurfootball, travel and the pub.

Aristotle thought a political community should exist to provide the conditions for leisure, which he saw as the key to human flourishing. At the very least, it is crucial for a balanced existence. Meaningful work, entertainment and indulgence all have their place, but they become destructive in excess. Life should be more than an on/off switch. Leisure is the space for conversation and reflection,friendshipand loyalty, playfulness andjoie de vivre. These are not qualities we can develop because we want them on our CVs: they are by-products of doing something for its own sake.

In a more civilised society, leisure would define our identities as much as labour does. To see what a distant prospect that is, try to imagine a politician talking about activities that might bring satisfaction to our lives half as much as he or she talks about ordinary working people or hard-working families. Celebrating leisure would be branded out-of-touch, but that is because we have accepted the disgraceful assumption that enjoyable pastimes are only for those who can afford them.

Asset-holding baby boomers are the masters of leisure today, using retirement for tourism, sport and artistic dabbling. Good for them. Still, we should resist the idea that such opportunities must be earned by decades of graft. This morality feels natural only because we dont acknowledge our common interest in leisure. We accept everyone wants higher pay, so why treat activities that enrich our culture as an extravagance?

The struggle to keep work in its proper place has already consumed a generation: the lifestyle guru Tim Ferriss published his bestsellerThe 4-Hour Workweekin 2007. It seems not all of us want to be our productive selves even on the toilet.

But its equally clear that blank slots carved out of our personal timetables are too flimsy: you cannot beat discipline with discipline. It would be better if we combined our productive energies and channelled them towards reviving the art of leisure.

[See also: Who is the four-day week for?]

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You should only work four hours a day - The New Statesman

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May 11th, 2023 at 12:07 am

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Phone Interview Questions: What To Expect and How To Prepare – Entrepreneur

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In today's competitive job market, standing out is more important than ever. Phone interviews and Zoom calls are often the first steps in the hiring process, providing candidates and employers a chance to get acquainted before more intensive in-person interviews.

Understanding the significance of this initial screening and key players' roles can give you a distinct advantage in your job search.

Phone interviews serve as a crucial opportunity for hiring managers and recruiters to assess potential candidates for a job. This step not only helps streamline the selection process but also saves time and resources for both parties.

In addition, a phone interview or Zoom call is an excellent opportunity for job seekers to make a solid first impression, showcasing their qualifications, enthusiasm and fit for the company.

A phone interview's primary goal is to narrow the pool of applicants to a more manageable number for in-person interviews.

During this stage, recruiters and hiring managers aim to verify the candidate's basic qualifications, such as experience and skill set and gauge their interest in the position and the company.

Phone or Zoom interviews also allow interviewers to identify potential red flags that might disqualify a candidate from further consideration.

The hiring manager and recruiter each play a vital part in the phone interview process. While the recruiter is typically responsible for conducting initial phone screens, their primary goal is to identify the most suitable candidates for the hiring manager to consider.

The hiring manager, on the other hand, is involved in the decision-making process and focuses on evaluating the candidates based on their expertise, cultural fit and potential contribution to the team. The hiring manager and recruiter work together to ensure that the best candidates move forward in the hiring process.

Related: Small Business Phone Interviews

As you gear up for a phone or Zoom interview, you must be well-prepared to maximize this critical opportunity. In this section, you'll find key areas to focus on as you prepare to impress the hiring manager or recruiter and take a step closer to your dream job.

To demonstrate your genuine interest in the company and role, thoroughly researching the organization's culture and work environment is crucial.

This knowledge will not only help you tailor your responses to interview questions but also enable you to determine whether the company aligns with your values and preferences.

Utilize LinkedIn and other social media platforms to gather valuable insights into the company's values, recent achievements and industry trends.

Follow the organization's official accounts, connect with current employees and observe their posts and interactions to understand the company culture.

The company website is another rich source of information. Pay close attention to the "About Us" and "Careers" sections and any available blog posts or news articles.

These resources will help you understand the company's mission, vision and goals, which can be useful talking points during the interview.

Related: 7 Surefire Habits to Prepare for a Job Interview

In today's increasingly digital landscape, Zoom call interviews are becoming more common. Creating a professional and distraction-free environment is essential to excel in this format.

You should have good lighting with natural or soft light sources that evenly illuminate your face. Additionally, choose a quiet space free from background noise and potential interruptions and maintain a neat and uncluttered background to keep the focus on you.

By taking these steps, you'll make a strong visual impression and demonstrate your adaptability and preparedness for remote work, giving you a competitive edge in the hiring process.

A clear grasp of the job description and requirements is essential to effectively communicate your qualifications and suitability for the role.

Skill set and certifications

Review the job posting to identify the specific skills and certifications required. Be prepared to discuss your relevant experience and if you possess any additional qualifications that can set you apart from other candidates, be sure to mention them.

Management style and team members

Determine the company's management style and team structure by researching online or reaching out to your network. Understanding these dynamics will help you convey your ability to thrive in the given work environment and collaborate effectively with team members.

Before the interview, reflect on your career trajectory and how it has prepared you for the position.

Last job and career path

Consider the key takeaways and accomplishments from your previous job and be ready to articulate how they have shaped your career path thus far. Draw connections between your past experiences and the role you are pursuing, illustrating your growth and adaptability.

Current job and career goals

Reflect on your current role and how it aligns with your long-term career goals. During the interview, discuss the skills you have acquired, the challenges you have faced and the milestones you have achieved.

By connecting these experiences to your aspirations, you can demonstrate your motivation and commitment to the role, leaving a lasting impression on the interviewer.

Related: A Successful Career Path Doesn't Have to Be Linear

Armed with a thorough understanding of the company, role and experiences, you're ready to tackle the phone or Zoom interview. Below, you'll find common phone interview questions and guidance on answering them effectively.

When answering this open-ended question, consider providing a concise overview of your professional background, focusing on your most relevant experiences and achievements.

Highlight key aspects of your work history that align with the job requirements. Emphasize the skills and accomplishments in your resume that make you a strong candidate for the position and demonstrate how your career trajectory has led you to this opportunity.

To answer this question convincingly, articulate your enthusiasm for the company's culture, values and the specific job opportunity. Consider using the following goalposts:

Company culture and job opportunity

Explain what aspects of the company culture and work environment appeal to you and how they align with your values and preferences. Additionally, discuss the specific job opportunity and how it aligns with your career goals.

Project managers and software development

If the role involves working with project managers or in software development, share your experiences and accomplishments in these areas. Describe your passion for collaborating, solving problems and contributing to innovative projects.

This question aims to gauge your long-term career aspirations and how they align with the company's objectives.

Career path and next job

Discuss your desired career path and how the role you're interviewing for will help you achieve your objectives. Show enthusiasm for future growth and development within the company.

Additionally, it is often wise to acknowledge that the phone interview is just one step in the hiring process and express your eagerness to participate in subsequent in-person interviews to further discuss your qualifications and suitability for the role.

To answer this question effectively, focus on your unique skills, qualifications and experiences that make you the ideal candidate.

Skill set and certifications

Emphasize your relevant skills and any certifications that set you apart from other candidates. Showcase how these qualifications will enable you to excel and contribute to the company's success.

Work experience and management style

Discuss your work experience and management style, highlighting how they align with the company's needs and expectations. Provide examples of your achievements and how your approach to work would positively impact the team and organization.

When discussing salary expectations, you must be prepared with research and clearly understand your worth.

Salary range

Research the market rate for similar roles in your industry and location, considering your experience and qualifications. Some great resources include salary websites like Glassdoor, PayScale and Salary.com, and the Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS), which provides national and regional salary data for various occupations.

Use this information to provide a salary range that reflects your value and is competitive in the job market.

Negotiation tips

Be prepared to negotiate if necessary. Approach the conversation with confidence, but remain flexible and open to compromise.

For example, consider discussing additional benefits or perks if the offered salary does not meet your expectations, and always remain professional throughout the negotiation process.

Related: 15 Top Tips for Salary Negotiations

While effectively answering questions is vital to a successful phone or Zoom interview, knowing how to navigate the interview process is equally important.

Below, you'll find strategies for tackling behavioral questions, identifying red flags, asking follow-up questions and handling situations where you may not know the answer.

Behavioral questions are designed to assess your past experiences and how you've handled various situations. Candidates benefit from using the STAR method to structure their responses clearly and concisely.

STAR stands for Situation, Task, Action and Result:

By following the STAR method, you can effectively showcase your problem-solving skills, adaptability and ability to learn from past experiences.

Throughout the phone interview, be attentive to potential red flags that could indicate issues with the company or role. These may include high employee turnover, vague job descriptions or unrealistic expectations.

If you notice any red flags, consider asking follow-up questions to clarify your concerns or conducting further research after the interview to make an informed decision about pursuing the opportunity.

Asking thoughtful follow-up questions demonstrates your genuine interest in the position and allows you to gather more information about the role and company.

For example, consider asking about the team structure, expectations for the role, opportunities for growth and development and the company's long-term goals.

These questions can provide valuable insights and help determine if the opportunity aligns with your career aspirations and values.

It's natural to encounter questions you may not know the answer to during an interview or Zoom call.

Instead of panicking or trying to bluff your way through the response, take a moment to gather your thoughts and consider the following strategies:

Once the phone interview or Zoom call is complete, it's essential to maintain a proactive approach to ensure you remain at the forefront of the hiring manager's mind.

Express your appreciation for the opportunity and reiterate your interest in the role by sending a personalized thank-you email within 24 hours of the interview. This gesture demonstrates professionalism and serves as a reminder of your qualifications and enthusiasm for the position.

Stay organized by keeping track of your job search progress, including the interviews you've completed, any feedback received and upcoming opportunities. This will help you maintain momentum and ensure you're prepared for any additional interviews or follow-ups.

If the phone or Zoom interview goes well, you may be invited to an in-person interview. Use the insights from the phone interview to refine your approach and further research the company, role and relevant industry trends. Practice answering common in-person interview questions and consider potential scenarios you may encounter during the meeting.

Should you receive a job offer, take the time to evaluate the proposal carefully, considering factors such as company culture, growth opportunities and work-life balance.

If necessary, be prepared to negotiate your salary and benefits to ensure the offer aligns with your worth and expectations.

Related: How to Write an Unforgettable Thank-You Note

Phone and Zoom interviews are critical to the hiring process, allowing candidates and employers to assess suitability and interest before moving forward.

By preparing thoroughly, researching the company and role, practicing answering common questions and effectively navigating the interview process, you can increase your chances of success and ultimately secure your desired position.

Remember to follow up after the interview, remain organized throughout your job search and be ready to evaluate and negotiate any job offers that come your way. With persistence and the right approach, you'll be well on your way to finding the perfect job match.

Are you interested in learning more about job interviews and other business topics? Check out Entrepreneur's other articles for more.

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May 11th, 2023 at 12:07 am

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The Fire Within: A Lag Bomer Primer for Growth – Between Carpools

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Ner elokim nismas adam.

Our neshama is compared to a fire, and there are a number of ways this can be manifested. What I have always considered the most poignant relationship between fire and soul is the constant pull to reach higher. A flame, no matter which way you turn it, will always face upward. Try it. Light a candle and watch the flame rise. Turn the candle on its side, forming a straight horizontal line. The flame still rises upward. Turn the candle upside down, and if you arent careful you will burn your finger, because the flame, of course, still rises upward.

Our neshama, no matter which way we turn and how far we stray, no matter what we fill it with and how we treat it, always yearns to reach upward, to connect to Hashem and to strive for growth. Through lifes distractions and temptations, confusion and deception, our neshamah is always reaching higher.

We celebrate lag bomer by lighting bonfires, to celebrate the Torah of Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai that illuminates the world. Rashbi declared the day of his death a celebration, because while his body left this world, the essence of his neshamah contained within the brilliant Torah he left us, is still here, illuminating our world until today. On some level, we are celebrating the eternity of the soul on this day. And so, what better day is there to tune into the calling of our neshamah, that ever present desire to grow and better ourselves as people and avdei Hashem?

We surely value growth. Weve all put high up on our shidduch requirement list that we are seeking a growing person. But are we really growing? Its so easy to stagnate and chas veshalom regress. We live in a world that celebrates body over soul, with unprecedented material bounty but unprecedented spiritual pitfalls. Now more than ever we need to develop a growth mindset to help us constantly reach higher, no matter what twists and turns our life may take.

In honor of Lag BOmer, I am sharing thirty-three strategies that can help us all focus on our growth, for just a few moments every day.

Look Up: Seek out Hashem in your life. Ask yourself at least once a day, what does Hashem want from me right now, in this situation? The beauty of living a frum life is that it is a G-d-centered life. Hashem is everywhere, in the food that we eat and the schools we attend. But so much of it is subconcious or by rote. We need to actively put Hashem back into our lives in the conscious decisions we make, and then we will see growth.

Look Down: Act with humility. The number one deterrent to growth is ego, or gaavah. When we are full of ourselves, there is no room for growth. Recognizing how small we are in comparison to where we can be, and how much we still have to accomplish, will give us the impetus to grow to get there. Look in dont look at everyone else self-consious, peer pressure, what society wants from you, comparison, what will others say etc. what do I know to be right?

Look In: Practice tuning into your own sense of right and wrong as opposed to making decions fuled by peer pressure and societal judgment. We spend so much time looking over our shoulders and wondering what our neighbors would think and then making decisions based on that, that we neglect to consider what we know to be right. And you know how the quote goes, If you are so busy looking over your shoulder, you wont be able to see where you are going.

Look Out: Dont be self-centered by enclosing yourself in your own little world with no regard for how your actions affect others and for how you can make impact. Rather. take a few moments a day to look at the world around you, at the people around you, and ask yourself, How can I be of service to others today?

Recognize Your Strengths: When I say to be humble, I dont mean to look down on ourselves. On the contrary, if we think we are worthless, we wont get anywhere. Recognize your strengths. List them. What are you good at? And how can you use these strengths to become a better person?

Concretize Your Calling: While none of us are blessed with the knowledge of our individual tafkid in life, we do have a global mission as ovdei Hashem. The problem is, that we are so focused on getting through the minutiae of day-to-day life, we often lose sight of the big picture. Why am I doing this? What am I here for? Take a few moments to contemplate that and then distill into a sentence or two. Write it down and keep it where you can easily access it and check in. I am in this world to perfect myself and make the world a better place. My tafkid is to spend every minute of my life according to ratzon Hashem. I need to spread kavod shamayim with everything I do.

Learn Mussar: Sifrei mussar are the greatest catalyst to growth. Just taking a few minutes a day to learn them spurs us to greater heights because they place growth front and center on our minds and make us want to become better people. And of course, if you are having trouble with number 6, this can help you figure it out! So whether it is an English sefer or Hebrew, you are learning alone or with a friend, find a few minutes for mussar and your life will change!

Find Role Models: Where growth is a lofty concept, nothing concretizes it more than seeing where you want to be lived by those whove already gotten there. Find yourself role models whose level you can aspire to. It doesnt have to be only one. No one is perfect and youd be hard pressed to find someone whos every move and every attribute you admire. Thats fine too. You can find different role models in different midos and different areas. You can have a simchas hachayim role model, a role model parent, a role model in self-control.

Set Goals: If you dont know where you are going, how will you know when you get there? Define your goals and then set clear and measurable steps to help you get there.

Be Accountable: Sometimes we slack off because its easy to slip back into bad habits with no one the wiser. If you are seeking to grow in a particular area, find yourself a friend who will be your accountability partner. You can discuss your challenges and triumphs, give chizuk, encouragement and pats on the back. This can be a peer who is going through the journey together with you and you support each other in the same way, or more of a sponsor relationship, where you find someone who went through the struggle and is already there. They can help you from the vantage point of success, with the understanding of what it take sto get there.

Collect Quotes: I am a big fan of those pithy sayings that can be more motivating and empowering than volumes of self-help books. Ive been collecting them since high school, making posters and collages and hanging them all over. When you come across a powerful quote with a strong lesson, save it. Hang those quotes prominently so that you come across them multiple times a day and you can remind yourself of those important values we tend to lose sight of as we go about our day.

Practice Mindfulness: We tend to complain that we have no time to work on ourselves, what with the hecticness of this wonderful life we lead. Thats why this strategy is so great, because it requires no extra time, but rather it takes what we are doing anyway and elevates it to a new level. Become aware of what you are doing when you are doing it. Focus on what you are doing, on why you are doing it and what you are feeling as you are doing it. So much of what we do is done mindlessly, so take a few moments of the day to tune into yourself and your actions.

Ditch the Cynicism: When you are cynical about everything, you miss opportunities for growth. Open your mind to possibilities and dont take your healthy suspicions too far by turning bitter and cynical about anything and everything that is different than what you are used to.

Get Brave: While we of course focus on our positive attributes and use those to make an impact, we cant ignore our negative traits and the areas in which we need to grow the most. Choose to improve in an area that requires herculean strength, so that you can truly flex your growth muscles. This will be the hardest growth you achieve, but also the most rewarding and the most enduring.

Believe in Yourself: When were in growth mindset we tend to focus on how much we have left to go, but be sure to notice how far you have come. Believe that you have what it takes to get to where you want to go, and dont be too hard on yourself when the going is slow. You are strong, resourceful and special and there is no limit to what you can achieve when you set your heart and mind to it. Never forget that!

Be Grateful: Infusing gratitude into your life will give you the push to keep striving for more. Spend a few minutes in the morning, when you say Modeh Ani, and a few minutes in the evening, as you give closure to your day, reflect on all of the blessings and gifts you have been granted and feel that intense gratitude coursing through your soul. No matter the challenges you may be facing, feel grateful for all that you do have.

Take a Moment of Silence: We live in a world that is a constant cacophony of sound, and most of those sounds are of the variety that drowns out the sound of the soul and stifles our urge to grow. So take a moment of your day to sit in silence, with no one but yourself and Hashem. What you do in that silence is up to you, but make sure to take the time to create it.

Talk About Ideas: As per the quote, Small people talk about people; average people talk about things; great people talk about ideas, try to pivot one conversation a day from small-minded topics and turn it towards matters of the mind or soul. If the people you converse with on a daily basis are only interested in gossip and frivolities, then maybe its time to rethink your social circle!

Help Someone Else Grow: Being a part of someone elses growth journey will inevitably enrich your own. How can you help someone else grow today? How can you support them in their own growth and be a source of inspiration to them?

Daven: Tefillah is an effective strategy for growth on two levels. For one, the very act of davening with sincerity draws you closer to Hashem, so youve already grown. Also, you need His siyata dishmaya to help you stay on the upward track. Daven for continued success in this area, for as we know, nothing happens without tefillah!

Envision the Escalator: Life is such that there is no such thing as stagnation. If you are not growing you are slipping. It may be slow, it may be imperceptible, but the descent is real. I once heard that life is like trying to go up a down escalator. You cant just stand still, because then you end up going down. In order to get ahead while life around you is pulling you down, you need to be taking assured, effective steps upward. Close your eyes for a moment and envision yourself standing on that escalator and the steps you need to take to get up to the top, even as its taking you down.

Silence the Saboteur: Identify the forces that hold you back from growth, whether its your inner self-critic, your yetzer hara hindering you every step of the way, or doubt and confusion, and silence those voices. Speak back with a voice of strength and courage and squash the destructive messages they are trying to give you.

Get Up When You Fall: Dont let failures distract you from the goal. Sheva yipol tzadik vkam. You may have lost a battle but the war is still yours to win, which you wont be able to if you surrender right away. Dust yourself off, take a moment to breathe, and then plunge right in again.

Grow from Challenges: The deepest growth often comes from the most challenging times. Tragedies are given to us as a means of self-improvement, every test is an opportunity to find meaning and growth within it. If you are struggling, take the time to figure out how you can grow from this struggle, so that even your suffering can have meaning and purpose.

Build on Past Accomplishments: Let your previous successes catapult you to more successes. When you find stagnation setting in, let your mind travel back to a time when it did work. Feel that satisfaction that you felt then and then allow that feeling to motivate you to work even harder to recapture it.

Take Care of Yourself: This isnt a few moments a day kind of thing, but rather a lifestyle, but the bottom line is that as long as you are tired, hungry and irritable, overwhelmed and overloaded, life is less about thriving and more about surviving. Make sure you are getting enough sleep, eating well and exercising so that you will be in the right frame of mind to move forward.

Find Meaning in the Words: You are saying the words anyway, you may as well find meaning in them. Whether its davening, bentching, brachos, or songs, understand and then focus on the meanings of the words and what they are trying to tell you.

Make a Cheshbon Hanefesh: Take a few minutes every day to go through what you did right and what you can improve, which situations warranted which reactions, and how you can react differently in the future.

Keep a Journal: Journaling helps you stay focused and makes sure you are checking in with yourself. It allows you to sort through your thoughts and to identify habits and tendencies. You can journal your process of growth specifically, writing down the steps you take, your progress, regressions, as you go along, or you can just keep a general journal. Both are beneficial.

Take Baby Steps: Great things happen one small step at a time. When you identify an area in which you would like to grow, dont sabotage yourself by taking it all on at once, setting yourself up for failure. Take one small step and repeat it until it is a part of you. Then go for another, and another. There is no limit to the heights you can achieve, one small step at a time.

Read Biographies: Reading about great people can inspire you to aspire toward greatness. While not always can we relate to every gadol and every level, there are so many steps until then, so many things we can learn from the giants of yesteryear, and spending time reading up on their lives can spur you onto greater things.

Purify Your Environment: While the push to grow has to come from within, it can definitely be influenced by outside forces. Surround yourself with people who inspire growth, spend your time in places that are good for your soul. Cut out venues that drag you down, whether it be a physical moshav leitzim or online platforms that drain the spiritual energy right out of you. Surround yourself with greatness, and by osmosis, some of it will seep into you.

Talk to Him: Besides for davening, keep a regular dialogue with Hashem as you go about your day. Tell Him about your struggles, thank Him for the blessings. I mentioned earlier making Hashem a part of our daily lives; talking to Him as if He is right there beside you is a surefire way to do that. After all, thats exactly where He is.

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The Fire Within: A Lag Bomer Primer for Growth - Between Carpools

Written by admin

May 11th, 2023 at 12:07 am

Posted in Self-Improvement


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