Grande Prairie Volunteer Services Bureau logo.

Sandra Heasler

GP Rural Crime Watch nominates for Sandra Heasler Volunteers of the Week. They wrote, Sandra is an exemplary volunteer who works tirelessly as Secretary of our organization. She is truly an asset and blessing to have in our group.

Barry Chorney

The North Peace Bracket Racing Association nominates Barry Chorney for Volunteers of the Week. They wrote, Barry looks after all our Security and Fire Services needs. Thanks, Barry!

Verna Horney

GP Centre for Newcomers nominates Verna Horney for Volunteers of the Week. They wrote, Since September 2018, Verna has been facilitator for our Wednesday Evening Group for the English Conversational Club. Each week clients meet for one hour and 30 minutes to practice speaking English in a small group setting through facilitated conversations. We are so grateful and blessed to have Verna as a volunteer. She is a cheerful, patient and friendly. She is passionate about her volunteer work with us and is genuinely interested in teaching and learning herself about different cultures. Her lessons and activities are always fun, and participants really appreciate and enjoy her facilitation style. Thank you so much for all that you do!

Silvia Coules

The North Peace Bracket Racing Association nominates Silvia Coules for Volunteers of the Week. They wrote, Silvia is always ready to help at the track whenever we are need. Thanks, Silvia!

Beverly Hildebrandt

GP Centre for Newcomers nominates Beverly Hildebrandt for Volunteers of the Week. They wrote, Since October 2019, Beverly has been co-facilitator for our Wednesday Evening Group for the English Conversational Club. Each week clients meet for one hour and 30 minutes to practice speaking English in a small group setting through facilitated conversations. Even though Beverly had no previous experience directly related to facilitating conversational group, she proved herself to be a perfect fit from get-go. Thank you so much for all that you do! We are so grateful and happy to have Beverly as our volunteer.

Find volunteer opportunities in Grande Prairie and area at https://gpvsb.volunteergrandeprairie.com.

FREE courses for individuals 18+ to develop skills and look for employment.

1/20

Career and Information Planning 9 a.m.-4 p.m.

1/21

Job Search Techniques 9 a.m.-Noon

Online Job Search 1 p.m.-4 p.m.

Writing Effective Resumes and Cover Letters 1 p.m.-4 p.m.

1/22

Personal Development: Positivity Works 9 a.m.-4 p.m.

1/23

Personal Empowerment 9 a.m.-Noon

How to Use the Cloud 1 p.m.-4 p.m.

Job Search Techniques 1 p.m.-4 p.m.

For more information and to register, visit https://wired2hire.ca/events or call 780-538-2727.

Non-profits become a GPVSB member! We offer advisory support, resources and more to the non-profit community. See all the great Benefits we offer our members athttps://www.volunteergrandeprairie.com/membership. For information about becoming a member, contact us at 780-538-2727 or email membership@volunteergrandeprairie.com.

The rest is here:
Tim Hortons Volunteers of the Week - Alberta Daily Herald Tribune

By Anna Iovine2020-01-20 10:30:00 UTC

Mashable's new series Don't @ Me takes unpopular opinions and backs them up with...reasons. We all have our ways, but we may just convince you to change yours. And if not, chill.

Anne sees lights-on sex as a mirror, or a Mbius strip. The 24-year-old looks at her partner looking at her, looking at them looking at her...

This does not scare her. In fact, that's what makes lights-on sex hot in the first place.

Anne, who's an MFA student in New York, went on to tell me that lights-on sex has always been the norm for her. In a society heavily impacted by porn, it's easy to see why. Porn shows sex with the lights on, for obvious reasons.

"I didnt think lights-off sex was necessarily real I thought it was a teen-movie trope or a relic of the 50s," Anne said. "I watched porn from a young age and the majority of that is obviously lights-on."

Now, she sees lights-off sex as a turn off. It makes her feel like her partner does not want to see her body, as if they're doing some sort of shadowy activity.

My first sexual experiences were lights-on, so that's what I got used to.

I am in the same camp as Anne. My first sexual experiences were lights-on, so that's what I got used to. I also watch porn, and no matter whether it's a glossy production or home video taken on an iPhone 10, the lights have been on. Even many movie sex scenes are lights-on because frankly, we need to see what's going on!

So, I never balked at it. I enjoy seeing my partner's body; I would not be having sex with them otherwise. And I assume they feel the same way about me. I can easily see what I'm doing, and what they're doing, and it just adds to the hotness of it all.

Now, having sex with the lights off almost seems utilitarian, or like we both have something to hide.

As I had talked to others and had new partners, however, I soon learned that not everyone thought lights-on sex was hot. In fact, some seemed downright afraid of it.

While Anne and I have been comfortable with having sex with the lights on since our sexual awakening, many people have the opposite experience. Given our Puritan, body-image focused society, it's easy to deduce why.

"Having sex with the lights off can stem from several personal and societal factors," said Adina Mahalli, a certified relationship consultant and sexual health expert at Maple Holistics. These factors can range from body image struggles to societal taboos originating from religious beliefs.

"Sex is seen as a sin in Catholicism and sex in many religions is seen as something that shouldnt be done recreationally. Shame in an act will make you not want to see well while participating in it," Mahalli continued.

Everything is on display.

Holistic sexuality coach Christie Federico explained that having the lights on adds an element of vulnerability to the act. Sex is vulnerable to begin with, and having the lights on can amplify those feelings. Everything is on display. Even eye contact during sex can make people uncomfortable.

"There's a fear of 'What will this person see if they look that deeply?'," Federico said, "A fear of not being good enough."

These are just some reasons why one might be hesitant to have lights-on sex. Frank, a 22-year-old software engineer in New Jersey, compared it to an old cheese or fermented fine wine. He said, "It is an acquired taste that needs not only getting used to but conscious pre-planning or thinking about." Frank said he liked having sex with the lights on when he was "proud" of himself and proud to be with his partner.

Given that having the lights on can amplify one's insecurities, having a supportive partner could help make it easier. That was the case for Alice, a grant writer from Oregon. "I started with lights-on sex when I met my current boyfriend, who is very into body worship and praise," she said. "I'm heavy, and I have some confidence issues, so I found it a little uncomfortable at first."

It can increase intimacy and connection with your partner and can lead to better sex overall.

Alice's partner gave her compliments and "sweet talk" that she said "smoothed the transition" for her, and now she finds light-on sex empowering and loves to be seen.

And there are other benefits, too. It can increase intimacy and connection with your partner and can lead to better sex overall. Mahalli noted that humans are visual creatures, and during sex you can go off of subconscious visual cues.

Also, plainly, you get to see your hot partner better with the lights on, and that is, uhh, hot.

That's one reason 22-year-old Sonia prefers lights-on sex. "I enjoy seeing my hot partners, and I like being seen by them in return," she said.

For those who want to feel that same level of empowerment and intimacy that lights-on sex can bring but are not sure where to start, here's some advice.

Start with the lights dimmed not fully on, but not fully off either or in natural light, so something like morning sex or an afternoon delight. "Dimmed light sex can set a more sensual mood than having the lights on full, while still allowing both parties to see everything that is going on," Mahalli said.

If you want to go a more woo-woo route, Federico suggested "eye gazing" or "soul gazing." Couples can sit or lie next to each other and stare into each other's eyes. This is an exercise aimed to make you more comfortable being seen, but with clothes on first.

If your hesitations have to do with body image issues, you may need to do separate work before embarking on a lights-on journey. There are a lot of ways this could be done, either on your own or with the help of a mental health professional.

Federico suggests spending more time lounging around naked to get comfortable with yourself and telling yourself positive affirmations. Something that's helped me is unfollowing social media accounts that cause me to compare my real-life body with someone's (often Photoshopped) photos; you can even replace them with more body-positive accounts if you'd like.

Ultimately, lights-on sex is something to try at least once.

The goal here is not to love yourself immediately; asking yourself to unlearn decades of body hate in an instant will backfire quickly. Take it slow. "A better goal than working toward loving every single inch of one's body is working toward simply accepting it as is, even if you don'tlove it," Federico said, "And remembering that your worth isn't determined by your appearance whatsoever."

Ultimately, lights-on sex is something to try at least once. If you are afraid or if you have and you didn't like it take a look and examine why. Is it because of your body-image? Is it because of awkwardness between you and your partner? The reason is probably beyond the bedroom entirely. It may take time to figure out and worth through but it may send ripples of benefits in your life including but not most importantly improving the sex you have.

Doing it with the lights on might feel awkward at first but sex, especially with a new partner, is naturally awkward sometimes. You are learning about your partner's body and they are learning yours, and it is not meant to be perfect.

"Lights on feels like an aid to the treasure hunt," Anne said. "Lights on feels like sharing. It feels like consent. It feels like bearing witness."

And, if you really want to, you can just close your eyes.

Read the original here:
Sex is better with the lights on - Mashable

The EMPOWERCARE project has been awarded more than 4 million euros of European Regional Development Funding via the Interreg VA 2Seas programme.

The project, involving 13 partners from the UK, Netherlands, France and Belgium, aims to fully involve older people in decisions concerning their own health and wellbeing, and provide the right support to enable them to remain in their homes, assisted by their local community. EMPOWERCARE will address the issues facing communities in caring for the growing ageing population, by bringing together existing, proven solutions, including innovative technologies, from across all project partners.

In 2013 the over 65s made up 18.2% of the European population and this figure is set to rise to a staggering 28.7% by 2080. Traditional services are already at capacity and the present system pushes people to the default point of safety: the hospital. With the cost of care for older people increasing it is necessary to integrate these groups more closely with their communities.

EMPOWERCARE will take a holistic approach, with 3 areas of activity: Empowerment, Technology Strategies and Workforce Development resources. These will contribute to a more personal approach to care and technology learning whilst reducing isolation/loneliness and increasing solidarity amongst older people.

Community Asset Based Development approaches will get to the heart of what matters most to local communities by harnessing skills and expertise of local people, co-creating innovations that make a real difference to lives, health and wellbeing.

The project will oppose a medical deficit model and instead focus on empowering people to take more responsibility for their care using technology and local services to keep them in work, healthy andmotivated, having control over decisions that affect their health and wellbeing. Learning networks will enhance shared knowledge amongst professionals and families to ensure durability and transferability.

Kent County Council Director of Partnerships, Anne Tidmarsh said: The EMPOWERCARE project provides a fantastic opportunity to address some of the challenges we face with an ageing population through technology, innovation and work to reduce social isolation. We are committed to putting people at the heart of service redesign and will use our ESTHER programme to help structure this project to ensure we engage our community in developing and achieving the right outcomes. Kent County Council and its Design and Learning Centre for Clinical and Social Innovation are very pleased to be part of this project.

ENDS.

NOTES FOR EDITORS:

Interreg 2 Seas: http://www.interreg2seas.eu/

Interreg 2 Seas 2014-2020 is a European Territorial Cooperation Programme covering England, France, the Netherlands and Belgium (Flanders). The Programme is part-financed by theEuropean Regional Development Fund and has a total of 241m (203m) ERDF to co-finance projects in the 2014 2020 period.

About The Health and Europe Centre:

The Health and Europe Centre works in partnership with local NHS and government stakeholders to bring innovation and investment to the health sector. We are unique in our focus of facilitating international learning and accessing EU-funded projects for the benefit of our local stakeholders. http://www.healthandeuropecentre.nhs.uk

ESTHER

The ESTHER philosophy was created in the region Jnkping in Sweden in 1997. The Esther model was one of the best-known examples of putting patients at the heart of redesigning services and has been adapted in Kent.

ESTHER

. Tags:

Read the rest here:
EMPOWERing individuals & communities to manage their own CARE - KCC Media Hub

Members of the Global Shapers Community, a network of young people at the World Economic Forum, talk about what theyre hoping to accomplish at this years summit.

Several members of the Global Shapers Community answered questions from The New York Times. Their responses have been edited and condensed.

With some of the mixed perceptions about Davos, what are your expectations of the conference?

I will be attending as part of an inspiring delegation of young people from the Global Shapers Community, which is an initiative of the World Economic Forum. I look forward to connecting and working with those who are leading at the front lines of their communities in the fight against climate change, who are restoring nature, who are helping to drive equitable societies, and who are committed to creating a more caring and inclusive world.

What do you hope to accomplish at Davos?

The most important part of the Global Shapers Community is the word community. At a time when our generation faces ecological, economic and values crises, some of the most vital technologies in navigating the path ahead are not necessarily artificial intelligence, blockchain or robotics they are empathy, collaboration and justice. I hope, as a community, we can be a constant reminder of that, as this years annual meeting in Davos seeks to redefine what truly matters as a measure of success for governments and corporations.

With some of the mixed perceptions about Davos, what are your expectations of the conference?

There has been a fair bit of criticism of Davos in the past, questioning whether the worlds elite has the courage to take necessary action in terms of climate change. For the 50th anniversary, the World Economic Forum has launched a new manifesto that is looking to hold companies accountable and nudge them to be more responsible, which I believe is crucial when we now have around 10 years to drastically reshape our societies to become more circular and self-sustaining.

In my eyes, its actually quite simple: We only have one planet, so business as usual is no longer an option. Our current model is clearly not going according to plan. Luckily, circular societies and circular business models would not only make us less vulnerable to the very scary consequences of the climate emergency but also create new opportunities for jobs and economic growth. After all, the pioneers of today will be the market leaders of tomorrow. That makes me hopeful.

What do you hope to accomplish at Davos?

With the COP25 summit, formally known as the Conference of Parties, concluding at last months U.N. Climate Talks, there is a clear pressing need for countries to set more ambitious targets to scale up renewable energy. I personally look forward to meeting world leaders and sparking discussions on how we enable a global clean energy transition.

We have never been better equipped to take on the challenges we face, and we could create much more democratic, decentralized and decarbonized energy systems for the future while lifting up to a billion people out of energy poverty in the process. If the future can be bright, why would we choose differently? This is a question I would like to discuss with world leaders.

With some of the mixed perceptions about Davos, what are your expectations of the conference?

I think its interesting and important to bring together different representatives to discuss shaping new economies, and I am proud to represent the youth and future generations. I look forward to meeting fellow Global Shapers and hope to meet women in power, to learn about barriers they have had to overcome and best practices to accelerate empowerment for future leaders.

What do you hope to accomplish at Davos?

I will represent the Shaping Fashion project and show how young people in 45 cities around the world have come together to share knowledge and tools, run collective action campaigns and change personal behaviors to revolutionize the fashion industry.

Besides shifting consumer sentiment, the $2 trillion industry needs drastic change and I will be calling for multi-stakeholder collaboration to measure, improve and transparently communicate environmental and social sustainability of fashion.

Transparency is something I feel very strongly about. It is our right to be able to choose companies and products that meet our values and we need information that is complete, comparable and trustworthy to do so. The industry and legislators need to empower us to make these decisions. Its what can truly accelerate the sustainable fashion revolution.

With some of the mixed perceptions about Davos, what are your expectations of the conference?

Davos may have the reputation of being a space where business and political leaders come together to sign deals, and perhaps forward their own short-term interests. However, there is no doubt that the decisions made today will affect our environment for centuries to come.

I wish to be a voice for future generations and young people, who will be the most impacted by these decisions. I seek to have empathetic and courageous conversations with those in power, and to advocate for a long-term, values-based lens in decision making.

What do you hope to accomplish at Davos?

Davos also brings together phenomenal leaders across sectors, and I believe they have a genuine desire to improve the world. One could call it idealistic, but I very much resonate with Margaret Meads notion never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed it is the only thing that ever has.

I look forward to exchanging ideas, and forging relationships with those also committed to restoring the health of our planet, and fostering the self transformation of individuals with the intention that this will support greater collective action and impact.

With some of the mixed perceptions about Davos, what are your expectations of the conference?

The Davos 2020 meeting comes at the onset of a new, vital decade, and 2020 is also the year that countries are required to renew their commitments with even greater ambitions. I hope this meeting will coerce world leaders to take action, especially in reducing emissions by 7.6 percent in 2020 and every other year! I hope the world will look back at this meeting in 10 years as one among many that jolted world leaders to take action.

What do you hope to accomplish at Davos?

Deliberately leaving no one behind is the only way we will achieve the sustainable development goals by 2030. Over 70 percent of Africans still reside in rural areas and continue to be alienated from development.

We must urgently listen to concerns from those on the streets and from deep in the rural interiors whose voices are rarely heard or examined with the primary aim to design and redesign and implement relevant action points with measurable outputs. As such, the question on my mind as I head to Davos is how to marry social innovation with technological innovation to achieve a cohesive and sustainable world!

With some of the mixed perceptions about Davos, what are your expectations of the conference?

In Davos, Ill be rubbing shoulders with many chief executives and heads of state who will no doubt acknowledge the importance of tackling climate change. However, those watching may view these words as lip service to the sustainability and stakeholder capitalism narrative.

While my country is experiencing the worst bush fire season on record, globally climate change is set to cause increasing harm in the coming decades. Now is the time to find innovative solutions for urgent climate action.

In Davos, I will be representing progress toward these solutions, seeking to convince business leaders that utilizing carbon emissions can in fact ease the pressure on the bottom line.

At Mineral Carbonation International, we have developed a technology platform that transforms carbon dioxide into building materials like cement and plasterboard. This is a long-term, safe storage solution that has the potential to lock away billions of metric tons of emissions from industry or captured from the atmosphere.

What do you hope to accomplish at Davos?

This year, we have the opportunity to spark real climate change action in many areas. I hope to demonstrate that carbon dioxide is a resource that can help, not hinder the planet.

If I can convince business leaders that decarbonizing is profitable, this will encourage desperately needed climate action, contribute to our Paris Climate Change targets and provide hope for humanity.

With some of the mixed perceptions about Davos, what are your expectations of the conference?

Davos is often viewed as an elitist and exclusive event. Even if this is true, it also serves as an opportunity for impact thought leaders and experts take the stage to influence our worlds decision makers and their agendas.

The theme this year, Stakeholders for a Cohesive and Sustainable World, spotlights this point at the onset of a critical decade: It is our last chance to limit global warming below 1.5 degrees Celsius and safeguard our future. My expectation and hope are that whenever plans are being made about the future onstage or offstage reducing emissions must be at the core of these plans.

I expect our world leaders to be bold in their decision making and actions. We need them now more than ever to lead from a place of empathy to serve those most impacted by their decisions including vulnerable coastal communities, minority groups and the young people of our world.

What do you hope to accomplish at Davos?

I hope to use this opportunity to support the voices and messages raised by young people around the world. We must listen to the scientists we are not running out of time, we are now out of time and we need ambitious, deliberate, action. I urge world leaders to take the following actions in true partnership with local Indigenous communities.

Make the policy changes needed to meet the Paris Agreement, as we must reduce global emissions by at least 7 percent every year until 2030 to safeguard our planet.

Support the protection of at least 30 percent of our planet by 2030 and invest in nature-based solutions and biodiversity.

Recognize young people and nature as primary and core stakeholders and authentically incorporate their interests and voices into decisions and actions that will impact them.

Read more:
Hoping to Shape the Conversation at Davos - The New York Times

Bengaluru: Poor women in Indias villages are more likely to take up jobs if their wages can be deposited into their bank accounts and they can be trained in digital banking, a September 2019 study by the US-based National Bureau Of Economic Research (NBER) has concluded. This eases patriarchal social norms and increases empowerment among the one section of Indian society with the least labour market experience, it added.

If poor, rural women can control their access to wages through bank accounts and receive adequate training for handling it, they are more likely to join or continue in the labour workforce in India, the study found. It also helped in accommodating changes in gender norms on women going to work: The study found that women who received digital deposits and training were more likely to hold female work in high regard. Although their husbands did not change their personal beliefs, they became less likely to report that husbands suffer social costs when their wives work.

Researchers used randomised control trials (RCTs) to study the effects of channelling womens wages under the Mahatma Gandhi National Rural Employment Guarantee Scheme (MGNREGS), into their individually controlled bank accounts, and not the account of the head of their family, typically a man.

Women who received digital wage deposits as well as the training to use their bank accounts, were found to be working more, as we said earlier, in both jobs generated by MGNREGS and the private sector. This increase occurred even though the market wage remained static.

The study was conducted in collaboration with the Madhya Pradesh state government and the rural development ministry in socially conservative areas in the northern pockets of the state--Gwalior, Morena, Sheopur and Shivpur.

Despite robust economic growth, the female labour force participation rate has declined from 37% in 1990 to 28% in 2015, making Indian women some of the least employed in the world, the study noted. Indias growth trajectory, and the well-being of its population, will depend on how well it uses public policy to lower barriers to female employment, it said.

Policy, when appropriately designed, can empower women in homes and even dilute common patriarchal norms, said Charity Troyer Moore, co-author of the study and director for South Asia Economics Research at The Whitney and Betty MacMillan Center for International and Area Studies at Yale University.

By working with women to open accounts, training them on how to use the accounts, and linking those accounts to NREGS so they could receive their wages as mandated, we see important improvements in womens financial activity, paid work--especially in the private sector--and views on women and work, she said.

India ranks low on gender parity

While global gender parity will not be attained for 100 years, India has fallen four spots to 112 among 153 economies since 2018, as per the World Economic Forums Global Gender Gap Report 2020.

The economic gender gap runs particularly deep in India, the report noted. Only one-third of the gap has been bridged. Since 2006, the gap has gotten significantly wider. Among the 153 countries studied, India is the only country where the economic gender gap [ranked 149th] is larger than the political gender gap.

Only one-quarter of women, compared with 82% of men, engage actively in the labour market (working or looking for work)--one of the lowest participation rates in the world (145th)--and estimated female income is a mere one-fifth of male income, which is also among the worlds lowest, the report noted.

Indias gender issue is a jobs issue--womens overall well-being has fallen as access to work outside their homes has declined, and especially as women move out of agriculture in rural areas, said Moore. There is a multitude of challenges to helping women access employment, but increasing demand in sectors that suit womens practical circumstances seems to be key here.

Many of the policy efforts undertaken to support women focus on their specific role as a household caregiver or mother. Though important, it should not be given at the expense of other efforts, like hiring more local women to serve in frontline work to support their communities development, and encouraging employment for young women who are out of school and not yet married, Moore added.

Empowerment for socially constrained women

The study conducted randomised control trials in 197 gram panchayats. And in 67 of these, womens bank accounts were linked to their MGNREGS wages and provided basic financial training to ensure they understand how to use their accounts if they decided to work. The study was conducted between 2013 and 2014, prior to the start of Pradhan Mantri Jan Dhan Yojana targeting Indias unbanked population. Follow-up surveys were then conducted in 2015 and 2017.

The study then compared outcomes for women who only received bank accounts (accounts only) with those who additionally received direct deposit of MGNREGS wages and bank account training (direct deposit and training).

Low levels of engagement with the formal banking sector beyond simple withdrawals and deposits by women and marginalised communities suggest that universal account ownership does not necessarily translate to financial inclusion or the ability to use banking services effectively, IndiaSpend reported on May 17, 2018. In 2015-16, 53% of women used a bank account in their own name, according to the fourth National Family Health Survey data.

The intervention found long- and short-term benefits in the group. Three years after the intervention, women used their accounts more frequently and more women were able to go to a bank to operate their accounts.

Women living in gram panchayats where training was offered to operate bank accounts worked more, as we said earlier, than those who only had individual bank accounts opened for them.

Further, the impact was more among women who had least or no work experience--in the study, those who had never worked for MGNREGS. These women have been classified as socially constrained to reflect that they are less likely to work, less empowered, and that their husbands are more likely to oppose female work.

The transfers to individually controlled bank accounts empower women to assert themselves in their families, the authors surmise. So giving a woman better outside options to the status quo may help her bargain and assert her preferences, which can result in increased mobility, said Moore.

Three years later, in 2017, socially constrained women reported an increased ability to spend and greater freedom to move about. After three years, their empowerment score was increased, effectively closing the empowerment gap between constrained and unconstrained women.

Gender norms and mobility

The study found that, compared with women who were given only bank accounts, those women who received digital deposits and training were more likely to hold female work in high regard. Although their husbands did not change their personal beliefs they became less likely to report that husbands suffer social costs when their wives work, the study reported.

Gender norms became more progressive in families where women controlled their wages, the study found. The actual norms (average personal beliefs about women and work) of women who received direct deposit and training were more progressive than those of women in accounts-only areas. Also, on average, the community was more accepting of working women.

Although husbands actual norms remained unchanged, perceived norms among men in the community were significantly liberalized, with greater perceived acceptance of working womens husbands, suggesting that women may in part be held back from working by mens misperceptions of the stigma they would suffer, the study said.

There are signs of womens increased decision-making and financial independence, but that does not necessarily come at a cost to men, said Moore. The results on decisions hinge around whether women report higher involvement in either deciding or helping decide how to spend money and whether to work outside the home--so an increase in womens power here would not necessarily mean mens influence declined, since they could be making more joint decisions.

Policy implication

The study is significant for programmes such as MGNREGS which aim to include and empower women through employment, offering them equal wages, the study says. Policies that cause women to increase engagement with those outside their families are likely to change social norms, especially as more conservative men change their beliefs about the consequences of adopting or accommodating progressive behaviours.

One thing our study didnt speak to is that limited mobility also reflects individual and household concerns about safety and violence against women, which are valid concerns, said Moore. This is where policy can play an important role. It can work to ensure public spaces are safe and open to both men and women, she added, to improve responsiveness to reports about harassment and violence, and to be responsive to womens inputs on these issues.

(Paliath is an analyst with IndiaSpend.)

We welcome feedback. Please write to respond@indiaspend.org. We reserve the right to edit responses for language and grammar.

Bengaluru: Poor women in Indias villages are more likely to take up jobs if their wages can be deposited into their bank accounts and they can be trained in digital banking, a September 2019 study by the US-based National Bureau Of Economic Research (NBER) has concluded. This eases patriarchal social norms and increases empowerment among the one section of Indian society with the least labour market experience, it added.

If poor, rural women can control their access to wages through bank accounts and receive adequate training for handling it, they are more likely to join or continue in the labour workforce in India, the study found. It also helped in accommodating changes in gender norms on women going to work: The study found that women who received digital deposits and training were more likely to hold female work in high regard. Although their husbands did not change their personal beliefs, they became less likely to report that husbands suffer social costs when their wives work.

Researchers used randomised control trials (RCTs) to study the effects of channelling womens wages under the Mahatma Gandhi National Rural Employment Guarantee Scheme (MGNREGS), into their individually controlled bank accounts, and not the account of the head of their family, typically a man.

Women who received digital wage deposits as well as the training to use their bank accounts, were found to be working more, as we said earlier, in both jobs generated by MGNREGS and the private sector. This increase occurred even though the market wage remained static.

The study was conducted in collaboration with the Madhya Pradesh state government and the rural development ministry in socially conservative areas in the northern pockets of the state--Gwalior, Morena, Sheopur and Shivpur.

Despite robust economic growth, the female labour force participation rate has declined from 37% in 1990 to 28% in 2015, making Indian women some of the least employed in the world, the study noted. Indias growth trajectory, and the well-being of its population, will depend on how well it uses public policy to lower barriers to female employment, it said.

Policy, when appropriately designed, can empower women in homes and even dilute common patriarchal norms, said Charity Troyer Moore, co-author of the study and director for South Asia Economics Research at The Whitney and Betty MacMillan Center for International and Area Studies at Yale University.

By working with women to open accounts, training them on how to use the accounts, and linking those accounts to NREGS so they could receive their wages as mandated, we see important improvements in womens financial activity, paid work--especially in the private sector--and views on women and work, she said.

India ranks low on gender parity

While global gender parity will not be attained for 100 years, India has fallen four spots to 112 among 153 economies since 2018, as per the World Economic Forums Global Gender Gap Report 2020.

The economic gender gap runs particularly deep in India, the report noted. Only one-third of the gap has been bridged. Since 2006, the gap has gotten significantly wider. Among the 153 countries studied, India is the only country where the economic gender gap [ranked 149th] is larger than the political gender gap.

Only one-quarter of women, compared with 82% of men, engage actively in the labour market (working or looking for work)--one of the lowest participation rates in the world (145th)--and estimated female income is a mere one-fifth of male income, which is also among the worlds lowest, the report noted.

Indias gender issue is a jobs issue--womens overall well-being has fallen as access to work outside their homes has declined, and especially as women move out of agriculture in rural areas, said Moore. There is a multitude of challenges to helping women access employment, but increasing demand in sectors that suit womens practical circumstances seems to be key here.

Many of the policy efforts undertaken to support women focus on their specific role as a household caregiver or mother. Though important, it should not be given at the expense of other efforts, like hiring more local women to serve in frontline work to support their communities development, and encouraging employment for young women who are out of school and not yet married, Moore added.

Empowerment for socially constrained women

The study conducted randomised control trials in 197 gram panchayats. And in 67 of these, womens bank accounts were linked to their MGNREGS wages and provided basic financial training to ensure they understand how to use their accounts if they decided to work. The study was conducted between 2013 and 2014, prior to the start of Pradhan Mantri Jan Dhan Yojana targeting Indias unbanked population. Follow-up surveys were then conducted in 2015 and 2017.

The study then compared outcomes for women who only received bank accounts (accounts only) with those who additionally received direct deposit of MGNREGS wages and bank account training (direct deposit and training).

Low levels of engagement with the formal banking sector beyond simple withdrawals and deposits by women and marginalised communities suggest that universal account ownership does not necessarily translate to financial inclusion or the ability to use banking services effectively, IndiaSpend reported on May 17, 2018. In 2015-16, 53% of women used a bank account in their own name, according to the fourth National Family Health Survey data.

The intervention found long- and short-term benefits in the group. Three years after the intervention, women used their accounts more frequently and more women were able to go to a bank to operate their accounts.

Women living in gram panchayats where training was offered to operate bank accounts worked more, as we said earlier, than those who only had individual bank accounts opened for them.

Further, the impact was more among women who had least or no work experience--in the study, those who had never worked for MGNREGS. These women have been classified as socially constrained to reflect that they are less likely to work, less empowered, and that their husbands are more likely to oppose female work.

The transfers to individually controlled bank accounts empower women to assert themselves in their families, the authors surmise. So giving a woman better outside options to the status quo may help her bargain and assert her preferences, which can result in increased mobility, said Moore.

Three years later, in 2017, socially constrained women reported an increased ability to spend and greater freedom to move about. After three years, their empowerment score was increased, effectively closing the empowerment gap between constrained and unconstrained women.

Gender norms and mobility

The study found that, compared with women who were given only bank accounts, those women who received digital deposits and training were more likely to hold female work in high regard. Although their husbands did not change their personal beliefs they became less likely to report that husbands suffer social costs when their wives work, the study reported.

Gender norms became more progressive in families where women controlled their wages, the study found. The actual norms (average personal beliefs about women and work) of women who received direct deposit and training were more progressive than those of women in accounts-only areas. Also, on average, the community was more accepting of working women.

Although husbands actual norms remained unchanged, perceived norms among men in the community were significantly liberalized, with greater perceived acceptance of working womens husbands, suggesting that women may in part be held back from working by mens misperceptions of the stigma they would suffer, the study said.

There are signs of womens increased decision-making and financial independence, but that does not necessarily come at a cost to men, said Moore. The results on decisions hinge around whether women report higher involvement in either deciding or helping decide how to spend money and whether to work outside the home--so an increase in womens power here would not necessarily mean mens influence declined, since they could be making more joint decisions.

Policy implication

The study is significant for programmes such as MGNREGS which aim to include and empower women through employment, offering them equal wages, the study says. Policies that cause women to increase engagement with those outside their families are likely to change social norms, especially as more conservative men change their beliefs about the consequences of adopting or accommodating progressive behaviours.

One thing our study didnt speak to is that limited mobility also reflects individual and household concerns about safety and violence against women, which are valid concerns, said Moore. This is where policy can play an important role. It can work to ensure public spaces are safe and open to both men and women, she added, to improve responsiveness to reports about harassment and violence, and to be responsive to womens inputs on these issues.

(Paliath is an analyst with IndiaSpend.)

We welcome feedback. Please write to respond@indiaspend.org. We reserve the right to edit responses for language and grammar.

Shreehari Paliath - Shreehari is an electrical and electronics engineer and had a brief stint at the National Aerospace Laboratories, Bengaluru. He has a master's degree in development from Azim Premji University, a post-graduate diploma from the Asian College of Journalism, Chennai, and as a writer has reported on enterprise IT and water, the latter at Arygham, a non-profit that works on such issues.

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Women More Likely To Work If They Can Control Their Earnings: Study | - IndiaSpend

LETTER | The Association for Community and Dialogue (ACID) appreciates the Human Resources Ministry's efforts in empowering technical and vocational education training(TVET) by developing a more relevant new policy in implementing TVETS agenda in line with industry needs.

This was outlined in the ministry's 2019 achievement report to strengthen the various sectors led by minister M Kula Segaran.

The empowerment of TVET education is unprecedented and the ministry should be commended for its efforts. This is also in line with the spirit of C 142 of ILO convention on human resources development.

While the efforts of the ministry are laudable, it is also vital to understand that TVET education by itself will not bring about the needed transformation in the education landscape of the country if there is no integration between technical training, social context and work ethics.

Integration results in having an effective and dynamic work culture.

I have come across students who graduate from TVET colleges, lack a proper understanding of what it takes to succeed in their chosen vocation. This entails an attitude of a long-term commitment to career development and the importance of interpersonal, communication and coordinating skills which has the elements of emotional and spiritual intelligence.

Being a human resources practitioner, I have come across young graduates who are very technically inclined but unable to express their knowledge well, besides not being able to recall instances of behaviours that resulted in problems being resolved or job well done that attracted good comments from superiors or teachers.

There is also the absence of general knowledge on current events in the country and how they could use such knowledge to improve themselves and the organisation they are in.

There are also issues related to grooming and inflated resumes about personal attributes that reveal little about practical work excellence. When I was in the UK last year, I had the opportunity to meet young people who were part of non- governmental organisations.

I was surprised to see young man and women aged between 24 and 27 heading departments in their respective corporate organisations, besides being part of NGOs fighting for causes dear to them.

In my conversation with them, I found a great deal of maturity that is shaped by knowledge beyond technicalities.

Therefore, it is vital that TVET education is integrated with character formation, social awareness and learning the social-psychological dynamics of an organisation.

It should be followed up with reflective learning based on experiential exposure that would test their character and social-organisational knowledge.

This is to ensure that students of TVET have a wider understanding of what it takes to succeed in their careers.

RONALD BENJAMIN is secretary the Association for Community and Dialogue.

The views expressed here are those of the author/contributor and do not necessarily represent the views of Malaysiakini.

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The missing link in TVET education Ronald Benjamin - Malaysiakini

Mashable's new series Don't @ Me takes unpopular opinions and backs them up with...reasons. We all have our ways, but we may just convince you to change yours. And if not, chill.

Anne sees lights-on sex as a mirror, or a Mbius strip. The 24-year-old looks at her partner looking at her, looking at them looking at her...

This does not scare her. In fact, that's what makes lights-on sex hot in the first place.

Anne, who's an MFA student in New York, went on to tell me that lights-on sex has always been the norm for her. In a society heavily impacted by porn, it's easy to see why. Porn shows sex with the lights on, for obvious reasons.

"I didnt think lights-off sex was necessarily real I thought it was a teen-movie trope or a relic of the 50s," Anne said. "I watched porn from a young age and the majority of that is obviously lights-on."

Now, she sees lights-off sex as a turn off. It makes her feel like her partner does not want to see her body, as if they're doing some sort of shadowy activity.

My first sexual experiences were lights-on, so that's what I got used to.

I am in the same camp as Anne. My first sexual experiences were lights-on, so that's what I got used to. I also watch porn, and no matter whether it's a glossy production or home video taken on an iPhone 10, the lights have been on. Even many movie sex scenes are lights-on because frankly, we need to see what's going on!

So, I never balked at it. I enjoy seeing my partner's body; I would not be having sex with them otherwise. And I assume they feel the same way about me. I can easily see what I'm doing, and what they're doing, and it just adds to the hotness of it all.

Now, having sex with the lights off almost seems utilitarian, or like we both have something to hide.

As I had talked to others and had new partners, however, I soon learned that not everyone thought lights-on sex was hot. In fact, some seemed downright afraid of it.

While Anne and I have been comfortable with having sex with the lights on since our sexual awakening, many people have the opposite experience. Given our Puritan, body-image focused society, it's easy to deduce why.

"Having sex with the lights off can stem from several personal and societal factors," said Adina Mahalli, a certified relationship consultant and sexual health expert at Maple Holistics. These factors can range from body image struggles to societal taboos originating from religious beliefs.

"Sex is seen as a sin in Catholicism and sex in many religions is seen as something that shouldnt be done recreationally. Shame in an act will make you not want to see well while participating in it," Mahalli continued.

Everything is on display.

Holistic sexuality coach Christie Federico explained that having the lights on adds an element of vulnerability to the act. Sex is vulnerable to begin with, and having the lights on can amplify those feelings. Everything is on display. Even eye contact during sex can make people uncomfortable.

"There's a fear of 'What will this person see if they look that deeply?'," Federico said, "A fear of not being good enough."

These are just some reasons why one might be hesitant to have lights-on sex. Frank, a 22-year-old software engineer in New Jersey, compared it to an old cheese or fermented fine wine. He said, "It is an acquired taste that needs not only getting used to but conscious pre-planning or thinking about." Frank said he liked having sex with the lights on when he was "proud" of himself and proud to be with his partner.

Given that having the lights on can amplify one's insecurities, having a supportive partner could help make it easier. That was the case for Alice, a grant writer from Oregon. "I started with lights-on sex when I met my current boyfriend, who is very into body worship and praise," she said. "I'm heavy, and I have some confidence issues, so I found it a little uncomfortable at first."

It can increase intimacy and connection with your partner and can lead to better sex overall.

Alice's partner gave her compliments and "sweet talk" that she said "smoothed the transition" for her, and now she finds light-on sex empowering and loves to be seen.

And there are other benefits, too. It can increase intimacy and connection with your partner and can lead to better sex overall. Mahalli noted that humans are visual creatures, and during sex you can go off of subconscious visual cues.

Also, plainly, you get to see your hot partner better with the lights on, and that is, uhh, hot.

That's one reason 22-year-old Sonia prefers lights-on sex. "I enjoy seeing my hot partners, and I like being seen by them in return," she said.

For those who want to feel that same level of empowerment and intimacy that lights-on sex can bring but are not sure where to start, here's some advice.

Start with the lights dimmed not fully on, but not fully off either or in natural light, so something like morning sex or an afternoon delight. "Dimmed light sex can set a more sensual mood than having the lights on full, while still allowing both parties to see everything that is going on," Mahalli said.

If you want to go a more woo-woo route, Federico suggested "eye gazing" or "soul gazing." Couples can sit or lie next to each other and stare into each other's eyes. This is an exercise aimed to make you more comfortable being seen, but with clothes on first.

If your hesitations have to do with body image issues, you may need to do separate work before embarking on a lights-on journey. There are a lot of ways this could be done, either on your own or with the help of a mental health professional.

Federico suggests spending more time lounging around naked to get comfortable with yourself and telling yourself positive affirmations. Something that's helped me is unfollowing social media accounts that cause me to compare my real-life body with someone's (often Photoshopped) photos; you can even replace them with more body-positive accounts if you'd like.

Ultimately, lights-on sex is something to try at least once.

The goal here is not to love yourself immediately; asking yourself to unlearn decades of body hate in an instant will backfire quickly. Take it slow. "A better goal than working toward loving every single inch of one's body is working toward simply accepting it as is, even if you don't love it," Federico said, "And remembering that your worth isn't determined by your appearance whatsoever."

Ultimately, lights-on sex is something to try at least once. If you are afraid or if you have and you didn't like it take a look and examine why. Is it because of your body-image? Is it because of awkwardness between you and your partner? The reason is probably beyond the bedroom entirely. It may take time to figure out and worth through but it may send ripples of benefits in your life including but not most importantly improving the sex you have.

Doing it with the lights on might feel awkward at first but sex, especially with a new partner, is naturally awkward sometimes. You are learning about your partner's body and they are learning yours, and it is not meant to be perfect.

"Lights on feels like an aid to the treasure hunt," Anne said. "Lights on feels like sharing. It feels like consent. It feels like bearing witness."

And, if you really want to, you can just close your eyes.

Excerpt from:
Here's Why Sex Is Better With The Lights On - Mashable India

By: Express News Service | Pune | Published: January 16, 2020 3:55:02 am The Indian Medical Association (IMA)

The Indian Medical Association announced a non-violent movement, to be held on March 20, wherein a march will be taken out from Sabarmati Ashram. Nearly 25,000 members of the IMA from all over the country will participate in the procession, sources said.

The decision was taken in a meeting held on January 12, an official statement from the IMA said on Wednesday. According to Dr Avinash Bhondwe, president of IMA, Maharashtra, the state unit has announced its plan for the event.

IMA Maharashtra has 210 branches, located in every major city, town and small taluka across the state, with a total of 43,500 members. All members will be contacted personally and sensitised about violence against doctors and hospitals, Dr Bhondwe said.

He added that medical students will be made aware of unfair and draconian laws by the government. Various social organisations, NGOs, rotary clubs, social workers and cultural associations will be informed about issues faced by doctors.

Doctors are pressing for legislation to prevent violence against doctors and the healthcare establishment. The bill was to be tabled in the current session of Parliament, but was withdrawn by the Union Home Ministry. With the draft legislation in public domain, the medical fraternity had expected that a law would be passed.

However, IMA expects that the government will not go back on its word in this regard, Dr Bhondwe said.

It has demanded a comprehensive solution to stop violence. The proposed law is only a deterrent. Adequate security and declaring hospitals as safe zones are part of the demands as well. Social determinants of violence also have to be addressed.

Addressing infrastructure and human resources inadequacy in public hospitals, as well as tax-funded schemes to purchase care from private hospitals have been cited as possible solutions.

Dr Bhondwe said if constitutional means fail to address the grievance, the profession will be free to launch its own defence at all costs.

For all the latest Pune News, download Indian Express App

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IMA to hold march from Sabarmati Ashram on March 20 - The Indian Express

People are the biggest adventure of all, and hitchhiking makes you need people, react with people and hopefully appreciate people. Coping with the difficulties forces you to depend on yourself, and grow in self-appreciation, too.

-Ed Buryn

In a recent column, When Depression Comes to Stay, I wrote, Perhaps in another column, I will share the details of the lost years that followed, the years spent hitchhiking around the country and Europe before coming back to Dayton to find a sense of family, purpose and meaning in a yoga ashram in the ghetto. And as promised (or warned), here it is

As I recounted in my previous column, I suffered my first bout of depression (or spiritual crisis) in 1973 when I was 17, which led me, in part, to seek relief, peace and solace on the road. I was part hippie with a little bit of hobo and gypsy mixed in. It is impossible to fully describe how exhilarating and liberating it felt to stand next to a highway with my thumb extended, completely trusting in the kindness of strangers to transport me to my next adventure, in some other town, state or country. Of course, it didnt always turn out well but I truly loved that life. It was a magical time life on the road a precious series of sacred, crazy and life-altering experiences that both astounded and confounded me and taught me more about the world than I ever learned in a classroom.

My spiritual guide for my vagabond life was Ed Buryn, a geeky-looking guy with glasses and a thick, black mustache and the author of two hitchhiking Bibles I grew to treasure in the early to mid-70s, Vagabonding in America and Vagabonding in Europe and North Africa. I didnt realize it until now, as I write this, but Ed also served as a kind of therapist. The words in his books were disguised as travel advice but they were really life advice; how to show up fully and completely within my own being, despite my heavy fear and sadness and step out into the world, vulnerable, courageous and alone. Depression tells us to hunker down and hide from the world. I refused. Thank God, I have always refused.

My original copies of Eds books burned up in the Carr Fire but thanks to Amazon, I secured a couple used copies in good condition. In the Europe book, we read, People are wonderful, and vagabonding is a way of personally proving it a way of getting to know people, and of knowing yourself. No adventure can promise more than that. In other words, trust others and believe in their essential goodness; trust the universe, but most of all, trust yourself. Be willing to fail. Never give up. Face your fears. Expect to be surprised, amazed and thrilled and you will be. And keep moving, because depression hates a moving target.

When we read Eds words, it is useful to connect with his underlying message or hidden meaning. When he talks about tourism or traveling, replace these words with living. Traveling is seen as moving from one physical place to another but also as a metaphor for our life journey of growth and what is required to make it meaningful. When he talks about vagabonding, please understand that he is talking about a special kind of traveling or living that is whole-hearted, curious, vibrant, open and authentic.

He wrote, This book tells you how to visit Europe as a way of blowing your mind and enriching your life. It says that tourism is bullshit unless you get involved. To do that, you avoid your travel agent like he was the cops, and go find out about the world by yourself, for your own self. Go as a wayfarer open to all experience; go as a courier over the map of Europe, bearing messages to your secret self.

According to Ed, Vagabonding is for people who want to be free and adventurous, yet realize it wont come too easily or without knocks. Youre not always certain how to go about it, either. Like any good psychologist, he recommends a specific state of mind that allows for new ideas and new experiences, for tolerance and humor, and insists that we must be willing to accept some discomfort, insecurity and risk. Amen to that.

Here is one of his best lines: Basically, you say yes to life, all of it, the whole spectrum, as opposed to the narrow sliver we get to be so content with. This advice is so essential, I could write a column on this alone.

Ed advises us to not live in the sterile confines of the mind, but to act decisively in the moment, committed to following through with whatever bold plan or adventure that grabs us and inspires us to dream. He wrote, We all have stuck in us deep somewhere a keenness for excitement, a savoring for the kooky, a leap-for-life outlook.

Continuing, The person who strikes off for himself is no hero, nor necessarily even unconventional, but to a greater degree than most people, he or she thinks and acts independently. The vagabond frees in himself (or herself) that latent urge to live closer to the edge of experience. Savor these words. Make them your friends.

Like Yoda, or someones idea of a mystical guru, Ed counsels us: Naturally, this can be a hard and heavy number at times, so your head better be ready for that too. Youll be unable to take it unless you understand that it has to be rough at times. Travel in general, and vagabonding in particular, produces an awesome density of experiencea cramming-together of incidents, impressions and life detail that is both stimulating and exhausting. So much new and different happens to you so frequently, just when you are most sensitive to it. A day seems like a week, a week a month. The total experience is stoning, and it psychically disintegrates you with its complexity and imagery. You may be excited, bored, confused, desperate and amazed all in the same happy day. Or hour. Its not for comfort hounds, sophomoric misanthropes or poolside fainthearts, whose thin convictions wont stand up to the problems that come along. One of the things to learn is that there is no right way for everybody to handle these problems; theres only your way. And you get better at it as you practice. Everybody, after all, makes their own scene.

I discovered that the value, utility and veracity of nearly every life lesson I learned from my parents, teachers or mentors could be tested on the road. It is the ultimate test track of life. Ed wrote, The right state of mind allows you to take one thing at a time and dig it. A vagabond learns this. You start really looking at places and reacting to people and finding out things for yourself. This opening-up and reintegrating process is one of the primary values of traveling independently, whether its to Europe or just into the future. You get the good vibes of experiencing meaningfully, of coping with fear and uncertainty, of becoming aware of the beauty ofthis world and your relationship to it.

In other words, many of us can go to sleep or go unconscious and miss out on our own life. This is impossible on the road. We must be wide awake and ready for whatever comes. It does no good to complain or resist. Existence is reduced to the essentials of what makes life worthwhile. When something moves, we must move with it or that opportunity is gone. It is maddening, mystical and free and we can all learn its lessons if we are ready. But we neednt worry because on the road, as in life, the chances keep coming, like that car as it passes by and pulls over, its bright brake lights glowing with the promise of a new friend.

My brother, Jim, 1974

Before my senior year in high school, I spent the summer hitchhiking around Ohio, visiting friends I had recently met at a state-wide, student council conference. And then one day, later that summer, on impulse, I asked my mom to drop me off on an entrance ramp for I-70 West. I was restless and bored and didnt really have a plan. I just wanted to move. I had tasted the vagabond life and I craved to experience more of its mystery and magic. Can the road call to us? It felt like it in those days.

I only had $15 and had barely stepped out of my moms car when my first ride showed up. His name was Bob Rubin, his favorite song was Donovans Catch the Wind and he was driving from Vienna, Virginia, the same little town I had lived in for five years in the 1960s. He was heading to San Francisco to go to college and I happily rode with him to Madison, Wisconsin to see his family before continuing on to the Black Hills of South Dakota. By then I was out of money and it didnt seem right to mooch off Bob any more than I already had. The only food I had was a bag of corn nuts and a few ketchup packets from McDonalds as I began thumbing my way back east.

Badlands, 1973

I only got as far as the Badlands that first day and that night was a rough one. It stormed hard and I sought refuge from the drenching rain beneath a school bus on a bed of gravel. I barely slept and the next day, I was hungry and exhausted and caught a ride with an old man (probably the same age I am now) heading back east on I-90. He said he was retired, divorced, and on his way to live with one of his adult kids in Minnesota or Wisconsin. And he was mean and grumpy. I was grateful for the ride but he was hard to like. Unlike most of my rides those days, he was not a happy guy, although he seemed to derive some enjoyment from being miserable. His backseat contained all his clothes, hanging neatly on a closet bar from one side of the other and he greedily drank out of a whiskey bottle as we sped along the interstate until he finished it and forcefully flung it into the grass-covered median strip.

We stopped for gas in a tiny town in the middle of nowhere between Kadoka and Okaton and the old man couldnt help making fun of the locals who were selling their junkie crap in yard sales in front of their homes. I was completely worn down by his negativity, my hunger and lack of sleep and I heard myself asking him, Why are you so cynical? I knew I was in trouble when he scrunched up his face and asked me what cynical meant. He really didnt know; and I realized I was about to insult the man who I was depending on for free transportation for the next several hundred miles; a cardinal sin that any hitchhiker knew was a rule of the road you must never break.

When I stammered out a reference to a person who is generally pessimistic and has a low opinion of humanity, he nodded somberly and informed me he had a sudden change of plans. He was clearly stung by the truth. He said he wouldnt be able to ferry me further as he would be seeking lodging in the very town he had happily disparaged a few minutes before. I knew he was lying, and he knew I knew, but it didnt matter. I can still recall breaking down and crying uncontrollably as I stumbled back to the interstate to seek my next ride, ashamed of myself for weeping as I said over and over, Big boys dont cry.

I persevered, found my way to Minneapolis to visit Chris, a girl I knew from high school before continuing to Milwaukee to visit my uncle Russ, aunt Amy and cousin Jeff. I returned home, and in January of my senior year, I celebrated my 18th birthday by skipping school for a few days (with my moms permission) and hitchhiking in the cold and snow from Dayton through downtown Chicago at rush hour until I finally reached Milwaukee again, to see Jeff play basketball for his high school team. I had discovered how good it felt to live adventurously and was addicted. After graduating, I kept escaping to the road in the summer of 1974, hitchhiking from Ohio to Florida to Virginia and back to Dayton for a David Bowie concert before doing all the same states a second time, this time with my brother. I couldnt get enough and wanted more.

Jim, kicking back on one of our rides, 1974

Once I returned home, my aimless existence continued. Instead of going to college like my parents had hoped, I got a job as a printers helper for half a year and saved up $1500, enough money to hitchhike through Europe and North Africa for five months (providing me with numerous lessons and perhaps, ample fodder for future columns).

Florence, Italy, 1975

And when I got back from Europe, I still wasnt ready for college, even though I was enrolled at Ohio University, had my dorm assignment, knew my roommates name and I went through orientation. I was still searching for something that I didnt find on the road and didnt think Id find in college. So, I dropped out before I ever went and instead moved into what some would call an ashram on the West Side of Dayton, Ohio called the Ghettos Palace Yoga Institute. My family thought it was a religious cult and I suppose it was from their perspective. But for me, I felt like I had a family again and our spiritual teacher or master, Wali Ahmed Sababu was as you might imagine: charismatic, mesmerizing at times and persuasive. I learned and taught hatha yoga, meditated daily and attended spiritual lectures every night.

I did eventually go to college while still living at the Palace and had one last hitchhiking adventure to see John, a high school buddy of mine, who was going to school at the University of Montana in Missoula in the summer of 76. We backpacked in the Flathead Indian Reservation, lost our topo map and wandered aimlessly for a couple days in the wilderness before finally catching a ride from some boaters on Lindbergh Lake who brought us back to civilization.

My friend John, 1976

I learned many lessons from my travels that are still with me to this day. For example, whether I was waiting for a ride in Germany or sitting on a park bench in Rome or walking down a winding, stone-walled road in Ireland, I learned to be present and experience the moment and all it contained and not as my mind wanted to make it. I learned to keep moving, to flow with and adapt to the challenges that constantly came my way. I repeatedly learned that wonderful things came after terrible things. A long, hot day of no rides in Francos Spain, for example, eventually led to a glorious encounter with a wonderful and kind soul who got me further down the road. And when the terrible things happened, and I had my share, I trusted I would survive and discover hidden benefits and blessings and I always did.

As Ed predicted, I met genuine and generous people every day who truly cared about me and my journey and sought to help. We traded books, food, wine, travel tips and spiritual insights. We gave and received kindness, trust and truth. As Rupert Spira states, When we feel friendship or love for one another, what we are actually feeling or tasting is our shared being. It is easier to know this on the road but nothing stops us (except our minds) from experiencing this wherever we are.

I savored simple things and required very little to be happy. As time went by, I needed less and less. I learned to be content in just being. I learned to believe in myself and fully accept myself as I was. This approach required faith and trust, not necessarily in a religion or God but in me. I read the Gita, a Zen text and the New Testament on a regular basis but knew each day, it was me I needed to trust in and believe in and rely on to get through.

At times, I was able to suspend all judgment, criticism, resistance, and blame and clear a space to be, just be, as if my true self was my constant breath, flowing in and out. I learned to be patient. The rides would come. And they did. The adventures were out there, like fresh fruit on a tree, waiting to be plucked. I didnt need to push the river. I learned to trust the currents as they came and went.

It is difficult, I know. This isnt always easy. My words could imply otherwise. I get it. Life on the road isnt like our normal work-a-day existence. I could never go back and do that all again. Im too old and its probably not as safe now as it was 45 years ago.

And like you, I still have my own mind to contend with. We have all been conditioned or programmed to think, feel and act in ways that dont always work. Meanwhile, something that isnt a thing doesnt change. There is this something more that is timeless, the ultimate truth of your being and mine. Call it awareness or consciousness, or simply being. If you get quiet for a moment, you can notice the noticer, observe the observer, be with that which you are. There are no words we can employ to capture it. It can only be experienced. It waits for us, as I write these words and as you read them. If we step back from our thoughts for a moment, we can touch that which we most intimately are and know that we are supremely well, regardless of what our minds tell us.

Life, itself, is the great adventure and as Ed said, the best parts of life are the people. Trust me on this, but more importantly, trust yourself.

See the original post:

Depression Hates a Moving Target - A News Cafe

In the latest episode of Mangala Gowri Madve, Mangala is puzzled as she notices Soundarya and Balli in minister Rudra Muni's house. She grows suspicious over Soundarya's intentions and tries to alert Rajeev. On the other hand, seeing Mangala roaming around Rudra Muni's house, Soundarya enlists Balli's help to discreetly click pictures of Mangala. She intends to use those photographs to drive Mangala out of the house. Elsewhere, Rajeev disguises himself like a civilian and is seen outside the ashram for Subhash to arrive. He also commands Pandu and Kumar to stay alert. As the trio is vigilant towards the ashram, Rajeev notices an old man speaking to Sathyanna and grows suspicious over his unusual behavior. However, Rajeev's suspicious become true when the old man drag Sathyanna to a nearby vacant room. Upon learning that the disguised old man is none other than Subhash, Rajeev and his team gear up to attack him.

Link:

Mangala Gowri Madve update, January 16: Rajeev notices Subhash in the ashram - Times of India