Some time ago I had a consultation with a prospect.

It went like this:

Prospect: I want to feel amazing all the time.

Me: Are you sure that this is what you want?

Prospect: Yes.

Me: Ok, lets do a health check on it

Of course, we think we want to feel great, amazing, ecstatic, accomplished (you pick your own high) as much as and as often as possible, ideally all the time. But its exactly this expectation that makes us feel miserable because we dont feel amazing all the time.

You cannot, you will not, and do not even want to feel amazing all the time, youd get sick of it.

The way society is these days makes us think we should be feeling constant climaxes and peak experiences. Why wouldnt you, right? Seems like others are. See their Facebook and Instagram and what they say.

Well, dont forget people typically broadcast the best parts of their lives, especially on social media. Photos of holidays, new cars, new houses, amazing this and amazing that. In the big picture, be grateful for that. Better than if everyone were complaining.

But also understand that these are the highlights of their life (often exaggerated for an ego stroke; we all have been there). Everyone is trying to market themselves in the best light possible, and thats understandable. We want to look good but just take it with a pinch of salt.

Think about it as a movie trailer. They always show the best seconds from the movie, the mind-blowing effects, explosions, actions, to make you go WOW, suck you into watching the whole movie because it must be so amazing. You dont expect the whole movie to be that way though, do you? This is the same.

Even the happiest people you know dont always feel amazing.

Im a life coach, and I work on being on top of my stuff and mood every day, and yet I had a pretty crap leave me alone kind of day yesterday. But I know these days come now and then (especially if you run your own business), and I embrace them.

Why? Because of days like this, I feel amazing.

Think about it: PEAK experience!

Have you ever gone hiking of climbing?

If you have, you know its the whole process that makes it a great experience. Dont believe me? How satisfying would it actually be to just be dropped off by a helicopter on the top, have a look and fly back down? Going from the base of the mountain, climbing little by little to the top, sometimes for hours or even days, leading to the sweet moments on the top. Its the contrast that makes it amazing. Its the difference between the high and low.

Wanting to feel amazing all the time would be like wanting to be on the top all the time. It would mean no valleys, no lows. It would then look like this.

How does it feel? Its anything but exciting. Its a flat line. If you dont have lows, you dont have highs.

An old friend of mine used to tell me a story about how there was a time in his life when he had it all. He had money, cars, girls, position, everything he wanted. Life couldnt have been easier for him.

It seemed like he was at the peak all the time, and so it reached the point when he looked up one day and said: God, universe, please hit me or do something because Im tired of everything going so well.

He got what he asked for. He got an opportunity to climb, reach the peak again, and experience the high again.

The truth is that these peak experiences are and should be just a seasoning of life. It doesnt mean that all the other times youre supposed to feel miserable or depressed. Not at all. Most of your life you actually feel fine. If you feel mostly low or depressed, then you should speak to a professional. But expecting to feel amazing all the time will backfire by you feeling crap because you wont actually feel amazing all the time.

When you are at your peak, enjoy it, experience it, savour it, because it shall pass. There will be a new low whether its because life knocked you down, or because you create it by finding another mountain to climb.

Remember, its the lows that make you appreciate the highs.

Your Life Coach, Tomas Svitorka

Continued here:
LIFE IS NOT ALWAYS AMAZING, AND YOU WOULDN'T EVEN WANT IT THAT WAY. - Thrive Global

MISSOULA -- State championship Saturday at Dahlberg Arena was supposed to make history. It did, of course, by not being played after state basketball tournaments across the state were canceled following Friday's semifinals, crowning the winners co-champions.

The boys basketball teams at Fairview and Scobey did still make history by becoming the first Eastern C teams to both advance to the state championship game since 1980, when Outlook defeated Opheim 44-35. Rollie Sullivan was the head coach of the Blue Jays at that time, one of his many coaching stints across the state, and was set to end the Eastern C's drought Saturday night as an assistant coach at Fairview.

MTN Sports sat down with Sullivan on Friday, March 13, hours before the Montana High School Association announced the cancellation of its state tournaments, to discuss the 40-year drought between all-Eastern C championships, how eastern Montana was at the top of its game during that era, and how basketball had and continues to shape his life.

Rollie Sullivan: "Let me tell you something, when I was coaching in the Eastern C in the mid-to-late 1970s, early '80s, there were lots and lots of good players in that league at that time."

MTN Sports: It wasn't even just Class C, you look back then at Plentywood, Scobey, but Opheim, Outlook, Antelope was in a state championship game, Poplar was really good. Was that just the golden era of hoops up there?

Sullivan: "It was really good. It was really good. The Puckett brothers from Peerless, very good players. The Hatfield brothers from Flaxville were very good players. Antelope, the Guenther kid. Westby had Allan Nielson and others. I mean, the Selvig boys in Outlook. There were just a ton of good players."

MTN Sports: Is it hard to believe, then, that literally four decades have passed since Class C has seen two East teams in the state championship? That was mind-boggling when I researched that stat.

Sullivan: "I won't say it shocks me, but it surprises me. At that time, I don't know if there was any better basketball than what there was in the eastern part of the state -- Eastern C, Eastern B, it didn't matter what. There were really good players. The schools have just dwindled in size so much that I can see where that maybe has happened, simply because some of those schools are no longer in existence. But I'm surprised."

MTN Sports: Before we break down any specific games or seasons or whatever, I know people would like to know and I would like to know, what are all those coaching stops that you have had? Can you remember them all, head coach and assistant coach?

Sullivan: "Oh yes. From 1975-80, the first two years I was (in Outlook) I was the assistant girls coach, then the third year I was the head girls coach, and then the fourth year I was back to the assistant girls coach. The fifth year I didn't coach girls at all, but all five years I was the head boys coach. In 1981 I was going to go back to school to get my endorsement in English, but I got a call from Frenchtown and ended up being there for a year, and we ended up winning the state tournament with really, really good kids. I was extremely fortunate there. Then I spent the next four years in Circle, and we played for the state championship in boys one year, I was an assistant one year and the head girls coach in the other year. At the time, my ex-wife, my wife at the time but now ex-wife, was the head girls coach the first two years and I was her assistant. The last two years, she has a baby and so I became the head girls coach and boys coach, and we had really good kids there, too. I had a great stop in Circle, that was a lot of fun. The last 18 years I was in Sidney as the head boys coach. So I can remember most of them. Being a coach at any level in high school, I think it's always fun. If you have kids that play hard, and I really understand how fun it is to coach the kids that play hard, coaching is a lot of fun."

MTN Sports: 1980, let's talk about that year specifically, you're able to come out on top in the last state championship that featured two East teams, what do you remember about that game? About that season?

Sullivan: "That season we played Opheim four times. They lose four games all year and all of them were to us. We were fortunate to beat them because they were good. They were way bigger than we were. Norm Dyrland was something like a 6-foot-7 kid and a good player, the Lawrence kid and the Moss kid, they were both in the 6-foot-3 or 6-foot-4 area, Kevin St. John was a 6-foot or 6-foot-1 guard, and then they had a little, I think it was Nelson, can't remember for sure the other guard's name, but they were really good. Loren Baker, really good coach. He was the head coach, then goes on and coaches great at Northern Montana College (now MSU-Northern) and elsewhere, if I remember right, but Northern Montana College, he did a great job. They were really good and really well-coached. Every game we played with Opheim got closer and closer and closer. There were a lot of points scored, and then our championship was about (44-35), I mean, it was low-scoring. I thought we did a nice job taking care of the ball, getting good shots off. We had the best player in the state, in my opinion, in Doug Selvig -- a 6-foot-5 guard for us. He was a great player at the University of Montana and in my opinion was the best player in the state of Montana that year. We had the best player, plus a bunch of kids that accepted their roles well ... we just had kids that accepted the roles and really were great kids to coach. They were all about 'us,' nobody was about 'me,' so it was a lot of fun."

MTN Sports: What about this weekend then? Here we are 40 years later and we get a chance to see two Eastern C powers. You said four times you (and Opheim) played that year, here we go again with another Scobey-Fairview match on Saturday night.

Sullivan: "Third time this season, and I think since I've been helping (Fairview), last year and this year are the only two years I've been helping again, we played them, I think it was three times last year and they got us all three times -- once in the regular season, once in the divisional championship and once in the state third- and fourth-place game, and now they're 2-0 against us this year. We're due to win one, gall dangit. Scobey is really good, and they're really well-coached. They have really good players. We have to play at the top of our game, we have to play our A-game. We have a lot of good players, too, but we have to play well. They're just diverse. They have so many kids that can do so many things. It's a handful for us, but we're as heck looking forward to it."

MTN Sports: Final couple of questions, how much has basketball, we've seen it within your family, some college athletes in the family, but how much has hoops revolved around your entire family, your entire life?

Sullivan: "My whole life. I have four kids, all of them played basketball. We had the good fortune that they were all pretty good high school players. My daughter Jordan played basketball for the University of Montana and had a great career here. She's now a member of the Lady Griz coaching staff. My son Jace coached a little bit in Sidney, my daughter Ashley coached a little bit in Culbertson. My son Ryan is now coaching in Casper, Wyo., so they've all been in it, they've all enjoyed it. They had no choice, they had to like it because mom and dad would drag them every place and make them play. But basketball has been so good for me, because I've met so many good people -- officials, other coaches, kids that have played -- it's been great. I've been blessed."

MTN Sports: You kind of answered my last question a little bit there, but outside of your family, all those relationships -- you and I were chatting before the cameras were rolling about all the old coaches and these familiar names you coached against -- Norm Dyrland is my uncle from up in Opheim -- what are those relationships you've made bouncing across the state from place to place?

Sullivan: "When you grow up, you think your best friends are always going to be those guys that you knew and were great friends with in high school, but my best friends in life are the guys I've coached against, coached with and met as a result of basketball. Obviously Loren Baker was a great coach that I got to coach against, but Terry Bakken was a really good high school coach, (C.C.) Zoonie McLean was impactful, Don Holst coached for the Griz here and was my roommate in college, we've been good friends forever. I could name 25-30 coaches that were really good coaches, in my opinion, that I've had the wonderful opportunity to get to know and become friends with."

Read this article:
What could've been: Fairview-Scobey was championship 40 years in the making - MontanaSports

Perhaps the most jarring thing among a million jarring things regarding our new (temporary, have to keep writing that) coronavirus-related normal is the pace at which all of this accelerated.

A week ago, for instance, every player in every major U.S. league was preparing to play games. Sure, there were adjustments such as locker rooms being closed to media and there was talk of large batches of games being played in empty arenas and stadiums, but it wasnt until Wednesday night when Rudy Gobert tested positive that the NBA postponed its season.

Others quickly followed suit from there: among them MLB, Major League Soccer, the NHL and all NCAA sports, including March Madness the last of which was canceled altogether instead of just delayed.

If you feel like you are operating in a hazy mixture of apprehension, boredom and in fits and spurts resourcefulness, Twitter is reinforcing that athletes and coaches are very much in the same head space. At a time when everything has been put on hold, including practices, heres a rundown of what some of those who planned to be playing or coaching are up to now:

MUSIC

Lets start upbeat. Were finding out that a good number of athletes have musical interests and varying degrees of talent.

Timberwolves guard Josh Okogie posted on Twitter a short video (just 14 seconds) of him playing a keyboard. Day 4 w/o basketball. Guess imma be a producer. Who tryna hop on this beat? he tweeted along with an admittedly catchy sequence.

The best part? Someone wrote lyrics for it and someone else actually put a beat to it and it sounds good. These are the heroes we need right now.

Giannis Antetokounmpo played a VERY rudimentary opening riff of Smoke on the Water, but he gets 1 million points for trying.

That seems to have inspired fellow NBA player Patty Mills to post his own guitar video. Im also free and available for any group in need of a guitarist. In box me for booking@Giannis_An34.

Golfer Erik van Rooyen can legitimately shred. No golf. Might as well have some @foofightersin your life! he wrote.

FUN AND GAMES

Karl-Anthony Towns, a known video game enthusiast, posted a video on an Instagram story with teammate and buddy DAngelo Russell dominating a game of FIFA soccer with 20 pushups on the line.

Giannis prefers to take his gaming offline. He posted a picture of a chess board and a late night game (1:59 a.m.).

BOREDOM SETTING IN

Alas, sometimes the down time gets the best of all of us. Under the ideal circumstances, with a bunch of unexpected time off, we could all be our best selves. Social distancing, closures and travel restrictions all of them necessary in the battle against a global pandemic create less-than-ideal circumstances and in many cases isolation.

Gophers mens basketball coach Richard Pitino tweeted Tuesday night at KFANs Justin Gaard and Dan Barreiro: You guys free this week? Ill talk about anything. You can make fun of my contract, career, .anything. Give me an excuse to drive around Edina for a few minutes.

That made me actually laugh out loud, which is a nice feeling.

Twins pitcher Randy Dobnak tweeted: Hey Alexa, what do people typically do during the spring months?

And just a few hours after Okogie posted the video of his piano skills, he admitted on Twitter: Took three naps today. Dont got nothing else to do.

The pandemic is creating FAR more serious health and economic problems, but these examples illustrate some fundamental, less serious every day struggles that are natural offshoots of our new (temporary, still have to keep writing that) reality.

Read more here:
Music, video games and boredom: How athletes and coaches are coping with coronavirus - Minneapolis Star Tribune

Your team looks to you as its role model for leading and learning. What do they see? Does it look to them like you know it all, like you're stuck in the past or like you're just cruising? If your team sees your thirst for learning, they will model the same behavior. Your continual learning hones your competence . . . and competence builds confidence. Confidence is critical; inspiring coaches need it, and their teams want to see it.

Today more than ever, there is a "leadership lab" of learning activities and opportunities available to help you build your leadership skills and refine your coaching mindset. There is a treasure trove of knowledge about leadership and coaching at your fingertips, literally. But there is more to learn than just what you can read on the Internet.

You can find best coaching practices everywhere. Observe the coaches in your life. You can find nuggets of coaching excellence from a parent or in-law, a clergy person, a speaker at a professional association meeting, a fellow leader, your child's school principal, a scout troop leader, or a particularly helpful salesperson at a local department store. Watch, ask, listen, and learn.

There are also lessons to be learned in everything your team does. Look for learning opportunities in post- project reviews, customer meetings, conflicts with other departments, changes in priorities, miscommunications, and mistakes. Seize all these experiences to build your coaching mindset and skill set.

Another way to elevate your coaching game is to glean wisdom from mentors. Mentors offer you a precious glimpse into their life experiences. If experience truly is the best teacher, then you would be wise to study the life lessons and expertise of a mentor.

For the greatest benefit, seek out mentors with the specific skills you desire to acquire. Maybe it's the company's top strategist, the salesperson with the magnetic people skills, the teammate who consistently wows the crowd with presentations, or the executive who everyone wants to work for. Target their strengths and learn what makes them the best in their area. As our goals evolve or you enter a new stage of your career, your mentors will naturally change. Be prepared to end mentoring relationships (always with appreciation) and be willing to initiate new ones.

The brilliant scientist Albert Einstein once said, "Intellectual growth should commence at birth and cease only at death." Wise words. Never stop learning. Take the time to invest in yourself so you can invest well in others.

Published on: Mar 18, 2020

The opinions expressed here by Inc.com columnists are their own, not those of Inc.com.

Read the original here:
All Great Leaders Have This in Common - Inc.

With everything going on in our lives, its common to feel as if our creative life needs to be put on the back burner. Theres no time to focus on our creations or balance yet another thing in our day-to-day.

I feel like Ive done a decent job at balancing my creative life yet still find myself struggling when things get a little hectic in the other aspects of my life. Our creative life is important in keeping us healthy, and our continual growth in something we love helps us take a break from the crazy.

But Ive developed habits for these crazy moments that keep me grounded in my creations. These are the small, and sometimes big, mindset shifts that keep me focused on maintaining a balanced life.

You have to believe you can balance your different lives. If your self-talk is always focused on how busy you are and how youre barely juggling things, youre going to continually be disappointed.Go in with confidence. Know that its possible to maintain your creations while doing life. You are capable of achieving your goals.

Between balancing my writing, work, and relationship, I feel like there arent enough hours I can stay awake during the day. Instead of getting frustrated that I cant get as much done as I want on my projects, I am confident that because I have other great habits surrounding my life, I can get really good work done when I am present with it.

When you are working on your creations, thats all you should be focused on. Let go of the rest of your day anddeep diveinto your creative work. Get caught up in the flow by scheduling your creative work for your most productive time of day. If you cant do that, just build time into your day where you can focus completely on the task at hand.

My best time to write is in the morning. I have the clearest mind, the stress of the day hasnt caught up to me, and I know Ill have an hour of quiet focus. I schedule my morning hours at home to be writing time before I head to work. The time cap helps keep me on task and working on the things that matter. I know I wont have time to write until my lunch hour so I make sure I get a good portion of my work done early.

Keeping a habit of health is critical for success in any aspect of your life. Prioritizing sleep, mental health, and physical movement are key parts of keeping your body and mind in peak condition. It doesnt have to be crazy, but getting enough movement in your day and sleeping enough can do wonders for improving your work.

Because my morning is perfect writing time, I know Ill have to sacrifice some of my evenings because I get up early. To get my best work done, Im up by 4:30 AM on the weekdays. Im not advocating you do this unless it works for you, but it means that if I want enough sleep, Im getting in bed around 8:30 PM. I also make sure I move throughout the day, especially if I dont come home and run in the afternoon. At the end of the day, I make sure I have a short session of meditation or journaling to de-stress and ready myself for sleep.

Youre not going to want to balance your creative life if you dont actually enjoy your creative life.While I say you should be passionate about your creations, you can find joy in just doing a creative activity that is fun for you. I am passionate about writing, which means Im passionate about building it into my life. Your creations should bring you some sense of fulfillment if you want the motivation of keeping it in your life.

As a writer, I never get it right the first time. With only an hour or so in the mornings, I dont always have time to go back and fix my work right away. It also means I dont have time to sit and make every sentence perfect the first time. When I write, I practice failing. Its not perfect, but I always go in with the understanding that this is a rough draft.

With all your creations, its important to practice failing. You learn more from your failures, and understanding what you can and cant accomplish in your timeframe is important for moving forward.

Because Ive practiced to failure, I know that my morning time allows me to write just one article or post and make it good enough to publish. I dont try to write anything more than that, and if I can finish early, I have enough time to edit an already written chapter of my novel. Knowing what I can reasonably do in a timeframe gives me the practice of maximizing my time.

Before I go in and work on something, I visualize what Im going to work on. It helps me continue thinking about my projects and prepares me for when Im ready to sit down and work. If I know what Im going to be working on during my creative time, I can maximize my efficiency in writing.

Visualizing your work helps you go in with a plan. It doesnt have to be a rigid plan but its something to get you over that first hurdle of starting. I know that if I dont have a vague plan of what Im going to write in the morning, I waste too much time researching or looking for ideas. Instead, I go in with a general idea and visualization of my final draft and let my mind take it where it needs to go.

Creating habits around my creative life help me stay focused on where Im going with my work. Changing my mindset to one of confidence and passion is critical to my success as a writer. Ive been able to balance writing daily, publish every weekday, and launch alife coaching business.

Some days it feels like a lot, but instead of letting myself get overwhelmed, I reflect on my confidence, visualize my progress, and continue practicing. A creative life doesnt have to be yet another thing on our plates. Use it to fuel the rest of your life and bleed confidence into your day.

Sign up for my newsletter and leave a review if you want a free habit coaching resource.

Original post:
Habits to Help You Balance a Creative Life - Thrive Global

BATAVIA The coaching landscape at Notre Dame High School continued to change over the winter when Athletic Director and head boys basketball coach Mike Rapone stepped down as the head varsity baseball coach after 12 successful seasons.

Though Rapone will remain on as AD and boys hoops coach, the search began for someone to guide the team on the diamond and the Fighting Irish looked no further than to keep it within the family.

Two weeks ago Mikes brother, Rick Rapone, was named as the new head coach of the program after a number of impressive years as NDs junior varsity baseball head coach.

Rick Rapone is still currently the JV boys basketball coach as well at Notre Dame, where his teams have gone 46-14 in his three seasons at the helm.

Im very excited, obviously, I love baseball and coached it my whole life at all levels, though Le Roy, Notre Dame and the (American Baseball Congress Collegiate) Wooden Bat League, said Rapone, who coached the wooden bat league from 2002-12. Im thrilled about it and Im honored to be in that tree at Notre Dame that includes Father Zietler, Bill Sutherland, Rick Mancuso and my brother Mike.

Rick Rapone, a 1973 graduate of Notre Dame, joined Notre Dame first in 2007 when he was the modified baseball coach, where he remained for seven highly successful seasons.

In 2014 he was named the head boys basketball coach at Le Roy High School, where in less than three years he completely turned the program around from being in the doldrums to on the verge of a sectional title.

As was highly publicized a few years ago, Rick Rapones tenure in Le Roy ended unceremoniously with his firing mid-season. Yet that has not stopped him.

I never saw that situation as an obstacle, he said. The circumstances played themselves out in that situation. But I knew another opportunity would come up and Im honored that it came at Notre Dame.

While at Le Roy, Rick Rapone was also the modified baseball coach, where a number of his players would go on to win multiple Section V titles with the Oatkan Knights.

According to a press release sent out by Notre Dame, the school says Rick, who has been a highly successful baseball and basketball coach, is recognized as a high-energy coach who has a proven track record of putting in the time to maximize his athletes potential.

In two seasons ad the JV baseball coach for the Fighting Irish, Rapones teams went an amazing 30-3.

However, like everyone else in the current situation of the world,

Ricks plans and his vision for the Notre Dame baseball program has been put on hold because of the Covid-19 pandemic.

Its certainly been deflating, to say the least. I was named the head coach the week before practice and the boys and I were all really excited, Rick Rapone said. And the weather was unbelievable. Who could have thought that we could have that many outside practices the first week. The energy was off the charts but then the e-mail came from Mike and everything comes to a halt. Its been deflating, not just to me but to the kids too.

Rick Rapone, who is the co-owner of Service News, earned a BA in History as well as both teaching and coaching certification from Roberts Wesleyan. He has three children Chris, Joey and Sierra who all are Notre Dame graduates.

Rick Rapone was also the Le Roy 19-U Travel team baseball coach from 2000-15)

He replaces his brother Mike, whose teams posted a record of 163-92, winning sectional titles in 2008 and 2014, while advancing to the NYSPHSAA Final Four both of those years.

His teams won six Genesee Region League titles and lost in the sectional finals four times.

View post:
Rick Rapone excited about ND baseball coaching job when the time comes - The Daily News Online

When societal order appears to be breaking down and life turns chaotic and unpredictable, we can be easily manipulated into buying into sociopolitical agendas that promote xenophobia and the scapegoating of innocent individuals and groups. This should concern us all

One of my specialty areas as a Psychotherapist and Educator is integrating Eastern philosophy with Western psychological precepts. This, along with my B.A. in Far Eastern Studies and my background teaching graduate courses in Cross-Cultural Counseling and Diversity Awareness, eventually led to my having a significant number of Asian-Americans in my Psychotherapy and Life Coaching practices.

In the past few weeks (prior to United States citizens being advised to limit our activities and remain indoors), if one of my Asian-American clients had a common cold and thoughtfully wore a mask when out and about, they invariably reported to me later in session that they received scathing looks and disdainful glances and were avoided like the plague.

They were treated as if they had committed a crime simply by being / looking Asian, wearing a mask, and being out in public. Some weakly joked that it was like they had leprosy and were an untouchable (it should be noted that some of my clients who are not Asian-American also wore masks during this time when out and they did not experience this sort of treatment at all).

As news of the coronaviruss global spread progressed, my Asian-American clients quickly became painfully and acutely aware that no matter what their actual ethnicity was (South Korean, Japanese, Thai, Hmong, etc), it was assumed that they were Chinese and were therefore potentially a Coronavirus Carrier.

These clients invariably shared their experience of xenophobia and racism with me in a matter-of-fact, detached manner, without any obvious associated emotional distress. You see, they had all been through this before. For example, several of my older clients were the only non-White students at their schools growing up as first-generation and second-generation Asian-Americans, and they were acutely aware of being the other feeling different, being ostracized and excluded, and wanting desperately to fit in and be accepted among their Caucasian peers. My younger Asian-American clients expressed more sadness, disappointment, confusion, and surprise regarding the social ostracization they were now suddenly experiencing but it was not the first time they had been treated in a less than, discriminatory way.

Yesterday, Anna Russell wrote an article for the New York Times entitled, The Rise of Coronavirus Hate Crimes. She describes several incidents of racially aggravated assaults and attacks. The fear and hatred fueling these assaults and attacks is both heartbreaking and rather horrifying to read, digest, and take in. And its not just Asian and Asian-American adults that are currently vulnerable. Asian and Asian-American children are vulnerable as well:

Last month, a boy of Asian descent was bullied about coronavirus at a San Fernando Valley school and beaten to the degree that he needed an MRI, said Robin Toma, the executive director of the countys Human Relations Commission which works on hate crime prevention (https://laist.com/latest/post/20200213/coronavirus-Los-Angeles-Asian-American).

Scapegoating a person or an entire class of people allows the scapegoater(s) to displace their fears, anxieties, and negative feelings onto the other (i.e., that which is seen a foreign or a threat). The scapegoater feels a sense of self-righteous indignation and a twisted form of justification which supports their targeting innocent individuals and committing violent acts.

Although the intensity of the societal rejection and silent condemnation my Asian-American clients have been subjected to these past few weeks may be more overt and obvious due to coronavirus fears, being the target of covert and overt forms of discrimination and social shunning is not a new experience for them. No matter that they were born and raised in the United States; each and every one of my Asian-American clients have been treated as the other at one time or another in their lives due to racial discrimination. And as their therapist and as a human being, it bothers me that they are used to it. Its just not something that anyone, anywhere, should have to tolerate.

Just when I thought it couldnt get much worse, it did. As of this week, President Donald Trump has taken to publicly calling the coronavirus the Chinese Virus (as evidenced in a tweet of his this past Monday as well as in ensuing tweets and comments made in the past two days), fueling the very same irrational fears and anxieties that have already led to the types of senseless hate crimes described in Russells article:

The United States will be powerfully supporting those industries, like Airlines and others, that are particularly affected by the Chinese Virus. We will be stronger than ever before! Trump wrote.

It should be evident to any clear-thinking, rational person that Trumps calling the coronavirus the Chinese Virus is not only ill-advised and unnecessarily racialized (some would say it was even unapologetically xenophobic); it is also an incredibly dangerous thing to do, as emphasized by Eugene Cho in his tweeted reply to Trump this week, (which I am re-posting in its entirety here):

Mr. President: This is not acceptable. Calling it the Chinese virus only instigates blame, racism, and hatred against Asians here and abroad. We need leadership that speaks clearly against racism; Leadership that brings the nation and world together. Not further divides.

Later, when interviewed, Cho, (who was born in Korea and immigrated to the United States when he was 6), said he knows three people who have been assaulted in the past couple weeks, incidents he believes are tied to the spread of the coronavirus.

I cant speak for all Asians, he said. I know for myself and my family, were not just contending with a health crisis . . . there might be backlash verbal and physical.

He said theres a growing sentiment that Americans fear is intensifying into anger, not just toward those who are of Chinese descent but toward anyone who is Asian. Theres already an undercurrent of animosity, he said, toward people of Chinese descent, which has been exacerbated by recent trade wars.

Its not just the U.S. President promoting xenophobic ideas related to the coronavirus. The University of Californias health services department posted on Instagram that xenophobia is a normal reaction during a virus outbreak. Huh?!? This is a school that is located in Berkeley, arguably one of the most liberal and woke places on the planet! This post, which basically normalizes racist, scapegoating thoughts and behavior has since been deleted. And the scapegoating of Asians is not happening only in America. A quick google search reveals that hate crimes against Asians are occurring at this time in many parts of the world, including in the UK.

All this got me to thinking about William Goldings 1954 novel, Lord of the Flies.

The novel told the story of a group of adolescent boys stranded on a deserted island after a plane wreck. Lord of the Flies explored the savage side of human nature as the boys, let loose from the constraints of society, brutally turned against one another in the face of an imagined enemy. Riddled with symbolism, the book set the tone for Goldings future work, in which he continued to examine mans internal struggle between good and evil (https://www.essaysauce.com/english-literature-essays/symbolism-william-goldings-lord-of-the-flies/).

In Lord of the Flies, the stranded boys (who have been suddenly deprived of authoritarian structures and all sense of adult-driven social order) project all of their repressed fears and anxieties onto what they term The Beast.

The Beast (which is actually just the corpse of an aviator attached to a parachute) featured within the story is significant in that it serves as a representative symbol of scapegoating: The true beast in this story is actually the boys themselves. Meaning, the beast symbolizes the evil that is always latent within our human nature, projected onto an external entity (which can be real or imagined).

Toward the end of the novel, the boy who remains most civilized on the island (nicknamed Piggy) is labelled a bag of fat by the boys. Piggy is deliberately killed by a peer who drops a boulder on him. His death firmly illustrates how seemingly inconsequential microaggressions can lead to aggressive attacks and even murder when we objectify and dehumanize others while denying our own darkness within.

It is my assertion that in labeling the coronavirus the Chinese Virus in a tweet seen by millions, President Trump didnt just open up a symbolic bag of fat, but a xenophobic can of worms. And in doing so, he is contributing to the creation of senseless and needless personal and collective suffering the kind of suffering presented by my Asian-American clients everyday in therapy: A deep, intrapsychic suffering that is most often born in solitude and steadfast, socially conditioned silence.

I can only hope that Americans are smart enough to see through Trumps latest blatant and obviously manipulative sociopolitical ploy. Because in a time in which we all need to unite and work together to minimize the physical, mental, and emotional discomfort and distress caused by what is now a global health emergency, it is not only dangerous, but possibly even deadly, to buy into concepts, terms, and ideas that are designed to scapegoat and divide.

Are you an Asian-American in need of more support? OCA Asian Pacific American Advocates is dedicated to advancing the social, political, and economic well-being of Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders (AAPIs). Visit OCA National Asian Pacific American Advocates for resources and advocacy information.

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To learn more aboutFamily Scapegoat Abuse(FSA), its signs and symptoms, and recovering from this most damaging form of systemic familial abuse, read my eBookThe Invisible Wounds of the Family Scapegoat(available via my secure website; see my profile, below).

Rebecca C. Mandeville, LMFT, is an internationally recognized expert in recovering from the negative effects of being raised in a dysfunctional family system. She served as Core Faculty at the world-renowned 'Institute of Transpersonal Psychology', and is a pioneer in researching, identifying, defining, and bringing attention to what she terms Family Scapegoat Abuse (FSA).

Rebecca works with clients online via a secure video platform as a Counselor and Childhood Trauma Recovery Life Coach. You may email her at [emailprotected] to set up your free online (video) consultation to see if her counseling or coaching services are right for you. You may also visit Rebecca's website to learn more about Family Scapegoat Abuse and her introductory eBook on FSA.

When not seeing clients in her counseling and coaching practices, Rebecca finds inspiration for compassionate living by spending time in nature and caring for her family of animals.

APA Reference Mandeville, R. (2020). Coronavirus and the Scapegoating of Asian-Americans. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 19, 2020, from https://blogs.psychcentral.com/scapegoat-recovery/2020/03/coronavirus-and-the-scapegoating-of-asian-americans/

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Coronavirus and the Scapegoating of Asian-Americans - PsychCentral.com

The World Health Organization declared Wednesday that the global coronavirus crisis is now a pandemic. So what does that mean? Experts weigh in to explain. (March 11) AP Domestic

Ken Frank is what they call a "Baseball Lifer."

The legendary Toms River High School South baseball coach has spent his springs on a baseball diamond for more than 60 years.

Since 1970, Frank has spent his springs coaching baseball at Toms River South. New Jersey's all-time winningest baseball coach with 894 had begun his 43rd season as the Indians' head coach March 6 when practice for the season began.

Now, with the closure of schools and the spring sports scholastic season in limbo due to the coronavirus pandemic, Frank, like everybody else is adjusting to the "new normal."

"I guess it doesn't feel like spring without baseball," said Frank, 73."This is the first spring I haven't been on a baseball diamond. Not being on a baseball field does feels a little different.

"Every time you think you've seen everything, something new happens. Right now, I'm worried about the health and safety of everybody. What the governor (Gov. Phil Murphy) is doing right now (with all the safety measures that have been put in place) is the right thing for all of us.

"Everybody has to understand why things are being done, be supportive of them and make it work. Whatever the governor wants us to do, we've got to do it."

Toms River High School South head coach baseball coach Ken Frank, shown in June 2017, is currently experiencing a spring without baseball for the first time in more than 60 years.(Photo: FILE PHOTO)

Sports:NJSIAA hopes to still have spring H.S. sports season if coronavirus outbreak dies down

As competitive as ever, Frank was excited with what he had seen from his team before practices were halted late last week.

"I was enjoying myself and enjoying being around them and the coaches (his assistant coaches).The kids were working very hard and showing a lot of energy,"Frank said.

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Frank, whose teams have won 56 championships (a Shore Conference-recordfive NJSIAA group championships, a Shore-record 10 NJSIAA sectional titles, a record 12 Ocean County Tournamentchampionships,a co-record seven Shore Conference Tournament titles and 22 Shore Conference divisional titles), always tells his players they have to be prepared for everything during both life and the course of a baseball game.

His message, in these unusual times, has even more truth to it.

"Youhave to be able to adjust in life,"Frank said. "This is an adjustment. You have to be able to handle adjustment and difficulties in life."

NJ coronavirus: Still hope to save high school spring sports, Shore Conference president says

One of the things Frank, who has coached some of the legendary players in the Shore Conference, including current Texas Rangers' third baseman Todd Frazier, has always preached is there are aspects of life that are more important than baseball.

"Number 1 is family first. Then yourself and your kids 2ndand baseball's 3rd,"said Frank, who along with his wife Cecila has four daughters and 10 grandchildren and has a younger brother, Bill Frank, the former highly successful Toms River High School East head coach. "I worry all the time about my kids and family."

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Frank is concerned for both his current and his former players, especially those who began their collegiate season, like 2017 graduate Justin Fall, who was 1-0 at Arizona State before his season was halted. He wonders how they are handling life without baseball. The NCAA has canceled all its tournaments through the spring, including the College World Series.

"I'm concerned for every ballplayer at every school who had their season stopped. It could affect their future as far as signing (with either a professional team or getting a collegiate baseball scholarship) goes,"Frank said.

With way more spare time on his hands than he is used to at this time of year, Frank, who keeps almost everything from both his family and baseball history, has been going through all his family pictures andall the albums of every team he has coached going back to his time as an assistant coach to the late Al Fantuzzi at Toms River South. He has alsowatchedtapes of old Toms River South games.

"I'm trying to do things around the house to keep me busy,"Frank said.

Like everyone else, Frank wonders when, and if the crisis will pass and whether he will get to coach even what would be a much shorter season should one actually take place.

"We've been in contact with our kids,"Frank said. "Right now, there's nothing to tell them. Nothing to say. We've got take things a couple of weeks at a time.''

Steven Falk covers scholastic football, wrestling and baseballfor app.com and is a life-long resident of the Shore area who loves the rich history of sports in the Shore area. 732-643-4267; sfalk@gannettnj.com

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Coronavirus: Toms River HS South 'baseball lifer' stuck with time on his hands - Asbury Park Press

Gonzaga coach Mark Few responds to a question from NCAA.coms Andy Katz after the Zags claimed the WCC Tournament title with a win over Saint Marys in Las Vegas. (Tyler Tjomsland / The Spokesman-Review)

A GRIP ON SPORTS College sports is different than the next level, as many commentators like to call the professional ranks. The biggest difference is, with college, the players come and go, but the coaches remain. For the most part. Our list of most accomplished college basketball coaches in the Inland Northwest over the past 50 years includes coaches who has stayed for decades and others who passed through rather quickly. But they all had success.

Yes, its a dark time in the world. And it's a dark time in sports as well, what with the cancellations and postponements (see below for some huge local news) of every season and event we look forward to this time of year.

That leaves a void. Were trying to fill it with some thoughts on seasons past, including todays look at the most accomplished college coaches in this areas past 50 years. (We picked 1970 as the starting point because we can remember back that far and these are our lists. Before then, we have to rely solely on the historical record. Thats not as much fun.)

Usually countdowns begin at, say, 10 (or in this case, like Nigel Tufnel's amplifier, at 11) and work their way toward the top spot. But we all know who is at the top this list, right?

No one has done more than Mark Few.

Gonzagas head coach has not only won more games 599 than any other Inland Northwest college coach, hes only the second ever to lead a team to the NCAA title game Jack Friel, in 1941 with WSU, is the other and the only one to win 30 games in a season, an accomplishment the Zags have reached six times in the past eight years. Hes head-and-shoulders above not only the Inland Northwests list the past 50 years, but would be for many other regions as well.

But who else in on our list?

Lets count them down

11. Kelvin Sampson (WSU, seven seasons, 1988-94): The Cougars were in disarray when Sampson took over for his former boss Len Stevens. Three years later they were even worse, finishing 1990 7-22, including a 1-17 Pac-10 finish. Then came four winning seasons, including 20-11 and an NCAA Tournament berth in 1994. Then Sampson headed to Oklahoma, leaving WSU with a 103-103 record.

10. Ray Giacoletti (Eastern Washington, four seasons, 2001-04): Not many coaches in the area can say they had a winning record every season they were at a school. Giacoletti can. His 69-50 stint in Cheney included three second-place finishes in the Big Sky and, in his last season, a conference title and NCAA berth. After three seasons as Utahs head coach, Giacoletti returned to the area and spent six seasons sitting with Few as a Gonzaga assistant.

9. Jerry Krause (Eastern Washington, 17 seasons, 1967-85): Krauses accomplishments as Eastern head coach cant be diminished. He won 262 games, though the Eagles were in the NAIA for much of his time in Cheney. But Krause also has to be judged by his influence outside EWU, including at Gonzaga (as director of operations), a member of the NCAA's rules committee and as a prolific writer of basketball-coaching books.

8. Dan Fitzgerald (Gonzaga, 15 seasons, 1979-1997): Fitz had two stints as Gonzagas head coach and was the first to take GU to the NCAA Tournament (1995). His 252-171 record seemed remarkable at the time, though it pales in comparison, of course, to what Few has accomplished. However, he earns bonus points for identifying young coaching talent, including Few, and giving those with it an opportunity.

7. Shantay Legans (EWU, three seasons, 2018-20): One of only two current area head coaches on this list, Legans has done enough to be included. Heck, this season alone might have earned him a spot. The Eagles finished 23-8 overall, were 16-4 in Big Sky Conference regular season play and were the top seed for the canceled conference tournament. Win that, and they would have earned the schools third NCAA Tournament berth. As it is, Legans already has a conference title trophy on his mantle. Add in his eight seasons as Eastern assistant and his legacy in Cheney is only growing.

6. Matt Logie (Whitworth, eight seasons, 2012-19): Logie has moved out of the area but his eight seasons at Whitworth included seven of 23 wins or more and seven NCAA Division III Tournament appearances. His record as the Pirates head coach: 194-35.

5. Jim Hayford (Whitworth, 10 seasons, 2002-11; EWU, six seasons, 2012-17): Hayford is the only coach on this list who was successful at two area schools, an accomplishment in itself. Whitworth had experienced success under Warren Friedrichs (251-195 from 1986 to 2001) before Hayford arrived from Sioux Falls near the turn of the century but Hayford lifted the Pirates to another level. He took them to the NCAA Division III Tournament his last five years, won at least 21 games in each of those seasons and reached the Elite Eight in his final year. At Eastern, Hayford became only the fourth coach to win 100 games at the school and the second to take the Eagles to the NCAA Division I Tournament.

4. Don Monson (Idaho, five seasons, 1979-83): The season before Monson arrived in Moscow, the Vandals were 4-22. The year after he left for Oregon, they were 9-19. In between, UI won 100 games. And lost just 41. In 1982, the Big Sky champions won 27 games and reached the Sweet Sixteen. No one, not even Hec Edmundson a century ago, has been more successful at Idaho.

3. Tony Bennett (WSU, three seasons, 2007-09): Its hard to include someone who only coached in the area for six years, three as a head coach. But Bennetts accomplishments in Pullman earn him a spot. All three of his Cougars teams played in the postseason, with the middle one earning a Sweet Sixteen spot in WSUs second consecutive NCAA berth. In those three years, Washington State won 69 games (and only lost 33). If Bennett had stayed longer in Pullman, he probably would be one spot higher.

2. George Raveling (WSU, 11 seasons, 1973-1983): No one in the past 50 years has had a more sustained run of success at Washington State than Raveling. In his final eight years in Pullman, he finished in the upper half of the Pac-10 (or Pac-8) all but one time. Thats remarkable. His 167-136 record at WSU looks even better when you realize he lost 48 of those games in his first three years. He also earns high marks for breaking barriers as the Cougars' first African-American basketball coach, not a small accomplishment in 1972.

I didnt really notice until I started putting this list together, but the coronavirus outbreak cost Few a chance to cross a milestone mark this season. Six hundred wins are impressive. Only a couple of coaches who plied their trade in the Northwest, even for a little while, have passed that mark.

Ralph Miller and Marv Harshman spent either all (Harshman) or most (Miller) of their life coaching in our corner of the nation. Some, like Kelvin Sampson, passed through on their way to either better or worse things.

It seems more than likely Few will pass everyone who has ever coached Division I basketball in the Northwest. In a little more than three years, if things return to normal, hell be over the 700-win mark. After that, who knows where he will end up.

Before we get to the majority of the links, we interrupt with some news. Late last night Bloomsday announced it was postponing the race to September 20, marking the first time in 44 years Spokanes biggest one-day event wont fill that first weekend in May. Dave Nichols has our story.

If the number of people who have been running past my house recently is any indication, the postponement is going to be felt throughout the community. It seems as if the recent virus-induced slowdown has released a desire to get out and run. Doing so with a Bloomsday T-shirt waiting down the road wont happen, however, until late summer this year.

Other large events were pushed back yesterday as well, including the French Open tennis tournament, the Kentucky Derby and another of golfs major events, the PGA.

WSU: It was a good year for Washington States basketball team, which is telling. A .500 record the Cougars finished the truncated Pac-12 Tournament at 16-16 is a step up these days. But it wasnt just the record, as Theo Lawson knows. It was how the Cougars got there. Over the course of the season there were many highlights, including the 10 he shines the spotlight on in this story. Around the Pac-12 and everywhere in college hoops, the NCAA will have trouble financially with the cancellation of its tournaments. The conference is at the forefront of the NIL issue. Washingtons Jimmy Lake is worried about things other than football right now. Oregon is moving ahead with plans for a new video board. It will be big. John Canzano delves into Jim Bartkos recent death and his life. The lack of pro days wont hurt the stars. It will limit the other players. The womens basketball polls were released yesterday and the conference was well represented, led by Oregon at No. 2. HBO has a documentary on the recent college basketball scandal. Its not kind to Arizona. The Wildcats final ranking is their highest in years. Utahs future seems bright. Arizona State is losing a player.

Gonzaga: The Zag women finished the season with its best-ever ranking in the Associated Press final poll, 13th. Jim Allen has more in this story. Jim also shares the news the women received a commitment from a player set to arrive in 2021. The interesting thing about Esther Little? She is another international player, joining a long list of those for the Bulldogs.

EWU: Larry Weir yesterday spoke with Shantay Legans, who may end up on the list we had above at some point. The interview is part of the latest Press Box pod. We will be talking with Larry this morning and will have a link to that conversation tomorrow.

Preps: A fan at the 2A and 1A State basketball tournament in Yakima has tested positive for COVID-19. Dave has more information in this story. Dave also has another interesting piece on how the ban on gatherings is affecting sports-dependent businesses.

Seahawks: Folks, Russell Wilson and Ciara get it. The Hawks haven't been linked to many big names other than Jadeveon Clowney. But they are busy with the mid-level free agents, including an offensive lineman. Teams may reach agreements with players in the free agent period, but it wont be official until the contracts are signed. That may take a while.

Is there anyone else you would add to our coaches list? Or do you think the order should be changed? Let me know. If youre good, dont worry. Well have something else tomorrow for you to get upset about. Until later

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A Grip on Sports: Mark Few tops our list of all-time local college basketball coaches, but there are 10 others to highlight - The Spokesman-Review

When you help a team put together a record-setting season, it should come as no surprise to be named the Coach of the Year in your sport.

But even after guiding Williamsville Souths Federation hockey team to a Small Schools championship-game berth and a school-record 18 wins this winter, finding out he had been named the 2019-20 All-Bee Boys Hockey Coach of the Year still caught Sean Green off guard.

Its a completely humbling thing, Green said upon learning of his selection. We play in the strongest section in New York State, and Id put the coaching in this league up against any other section in the state. Youve got to be ready to coach and have the team ready to play because, on any given night, anyone can beat anyone. Im just completely humbled by this, given all of the other good coaches in our league.

I have the easy job, getting to coach the kids, Green continued. For these kids to dedicate hours a week to a sport with so many other things they could be doing, its incredible. I might get this honor but so many more are involved in it, like my assistant coaches Scott Horton and Bill McGowan. I couldnt do it without them, and we do it because we love the sport and love the kids.

Green, who took South to the state final in his debut season, called this winter by far the best single season, on paper, that weve ever had. The Billies, though they lost to Starpoint in that Small Schools title game, constructed an 11-game winning streak heading into that contest en route to finishing the season with a school-record 18 wins overall.

This year we knew would be a special year with the kids we had, but what made a difference this year was the senior leadership and what they brought to the team, Green said. They completely changed the culture of our program for years to come. Their example will carry on to the next group and the next for years to come. Early in the year we talked about how we were an enigma to everyone else; we started winning game after game, carried that on, and just kept believing not hoping that we could win. Its easy to coach guys like that.

Hockey has been a big part of Greens life for many years. He won a couple of national championships through Amherst hockey, played collegiately at Oswego State College and went on to play professionally overseas for a few years before turning to coaching. Along the way, he learned quite a bit and drew bits and pieces from everyone that he worked with to form his own coaching practices and ideals.

I think one of the bigger aspects of my coaching style is that I want players to have their own hockey ability and hockey sense, and not feel stuck in any one style or system, Green said. Theyre the ones in the heat of the battle, so theyll say, Hey, we can do this or that, and that open communication we had with them was so vital to our success. We just try to get the right chemistry all the time, trying to have everyone together and be all inclusive.

And we always try to teach them life lessons as well, Green continued. We all want to win, but during the course of the season there are so many opportunities to teach life lessons. Ive had so many former players come back and tell me how much they enjoyed all the things they did together as a group off the ice as much as they did the games on the ice. It just makes everything so much more satisfying.

Green called beating Kenmore West in overtime in the semifinals his favorite memory of the season, but it wasnt so much for the outcome as it was for the reaction in the locker room afterwards. Similarly, the somberness in the locker room after the finals loss stands out in Greens mind when reflecting on the ups and downs of this past winter.

With so many tough small schools out there, its truly tough to have postseason success, so getting to watch them celebrate after that win over Kenmore West was great, Green said. And then to watch them leave the locker room after the loss to Starpoint but watching the bonds of those guys between the hugs and the tears you could see that they had learned some valuable life lessons. They said goodbye to the season that day but enjoyed the success that we had at the same time.

Green is one to constantly seek out new lessons to learn as well when it comes to better ways to get the most out of his current crop of players. Green, who called Google a wonderful thing, will listen to coaches speeches or podcasts, just to hear how they communicate with their teams. Hell also read up on other things coaches do, just to see if theres a little thing he could take and try and fit into his approach.

You have to constantly be trying to learn and better yourself, Green said. You have to be flexible with what you do we changed up three of our systems this year because of the kids we had in our lineup because thats one of the best ways you can make sure youre doing right by your players. So, for me, just listening to other people is so invaluable.

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South's Green tabbed Coach of the Year - Lancaster Bee